Posted by Chris A. on July 6, 2000, at 18:14:32
In reply to Chris A…are you out there?, posted by Janice on July 4, 2000, at 23:34:50
Dear Janice,
Thanks very much for your prayers. They probably
help more than
anything else.
Today is better. Perhaps I wouldn't have become so
desperate as to
attempt suicide
- to end the pain - if I had continued with ECT.
The cognitive side
effects (confusion
and significant memory loss) were escalating. They
are still a
problem, as are the
dysphoric hypomania, the rapid cycling and the
depression that
never quits. I'm not
sure where that all fits into the DSM IV.
Ninety-nine percent of
ADs, stimulants and
their relatives, not to mention neuroleptics scare
me because of
the cycling and bit of
TD I have experienced. Mood stabilizers simply
haven't worked.
Nimodipine was
stabilizing - at about zero on a depression scale
of one to ten. We
are back to
lamotrigine. It's hard to be optimistic when it
hasn't worked well
in the past. My
consultant had even questioned as to whether it
contributed to my
cycling, although
there were no other evident adverse effects. We
are still exploring
the unlikely
possibility of Hashimoto's related encephalopathy.
We're changing
my ERT back to
one that also targets the brain instead of the
selective raloxifine
(Evista) that I've been
on. The risk vs. benefit picture is one that my
Gyn will frown on.
The biopsies get
rather old after so long. We're also looking at an
additional
consult with someone
who can put the endo, mood disorder and gyn pieces
together in a
complete puzzle.
Thanks for the VNS site. I am holding off to see
what further
clinical trials show. It's
hard to forget the "honey-moon" effect surrounding
the origianl
rTMS trials. I was
ready to get on a plane for Charleston, but
thankful that I didn't.
It would be good to
visit with our friends who had a VNS implanted in
their son this
spring to treat severe
epilepsy. That reminds me, I still have their
video put out by
Cyberonics for patients
and families. VNS might be the answer, but I am
not ready to jump,
just as I am not
ready to jump into getting meds from overseas just
yet. We lived
overseas for
several years and were not necessarily impressed
by some of the
medication
approval procedures employed. Is anything that's
pharmacologically
active
completely free of potential side effects? Some of
us that are
quite sensitive to
adverse effects have to be especially careful.
How is the topirimate trial going? It has
definitely been effective
for some treatment
resistant bipolar patients and I hope and pray you
are among them,
as you have
been through the trenchs and hope that they aren't
in your future.
For today I am planning on staying out of the
hospital and out of
the morgue. It isn't
good for families and probably isn't what God had
in mind.Blessings to a caring and valuable friend,
Chris A.
poster:Chris A.
thread:39404
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000630/msgs/39595.html