Posted by CarolAnn on July 6, 2000, at 8:51:03
In reply to Re: River dry? Check for springs » ryan_s, posted by KarenB on July 5, 2000, at 19:21:46
You said what I meant to say, better then I could say it!!!
I do also believe that self-esteem can be helped with medication. I think I really meant to just have ryan consider whether his therapist has been addressing the problems of whether past "issues" might be causing some of the negativity.
I know that my "negative" voices come from my childhood perspective that I was unloved and unwanted. When I start to hear self-critical talk, it's always things that my mother use to say to me. After two years of therapy, and a lot of reading and thinking, I can perceive my mother's criticism differently. She really believes she is helping me. For example: in my early twenties(when my social life was non-existant), if I mentioned anything about wanting a family, she would say things like, "oh you don't want to be stuck home with kids, you never get to go anywhere, a family just takes away your freedom...ect". I always thought she was attacking me personally as her child, as if the things she was saying were actually her feelings about having me. What I realize now, is that she was trying to PROTECT me from disappointment, because from what she could see, it didn't seem possible that I would even meet a man, let alone marry and have a family.
Of course, it's one thing to know something 'rationally' and another to be stuck with feelings that are 'irrational'. I do still battle inner negativity and am not always successful at "reframing" my perceptions. So, you're right, this is where medication comes in. When it helps, it stops me from "going there" mentally. Medication also stops my mind from going in circles, like, "you're awful, no I'm not, yes you are...ect". Am I the only one whose mind does that? Is this post a good example of ADD at work or what? I'm so hyper-focused on the point I'm trying to make, but unable to focus on the best way to make my point! Yadda, yadda, yadda! Well, you're my friend, so I know you'll at least attempt to figure it all about! Oh geez, I just realized this thread is supposed to be in support of ryan...ryan, I'm sorry I just can't 'delete', it took me almost an hour to write this. with love, from CarolAnn
poster:CarolAnn
thread:39467
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000630/msgs/39547.html