Posted by Adam on June 3, 2000, at 14:37:58
In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by Elizabeth on June 3, 2000, at 7:08:59
Hmm.
I think this represents sage observation. I essentially thought this boiled down to a bias in favor of the noble underdog (both as a self-identity and a community to identify with), coupled with a tenacious, and sometimes untenable desire to conflict with a larger, hostile "establishment", and/or those who appear to represent or defend it. I didn't consider the deeper motivations. Perhaps I could, if I felt victimized, characterize myself as a straw man torched by a firebrand, but I don't feel victimized, just misunderstood, and because I am also a tenacious debator, I can hardly claim total innocence.
I don't make the rules here, and don't presume to tell Dr. Bob what to do, but I was suprised that the boBB handle was silenced. I didn't find the exchange "uncivil" by my definition. I never felt particularly hurt, just irritated and misrepresented. False or mistaken accusations (of which I am guilty, it would appear) can happen, and even if the intent isn't malicious, I guess angry reponses are to be expected until the issue is clarified.
What I consider to be "uncivil" is behaviour that is without any redeeming value whatsoever, and material that is unregenerately hateful and brutal. There are few without sociopathic tendancies who want to be exposed to that.
Not to say I wasn't disturbed, but I don't see any sociopaths here. I could be wrong (given a lack of familiarity with the nuances of psychology), but I don't.
Anyway, I am STILL really curious about the logistics of registration, and real information (not just idle suspicion or overconfidence) about costs and benefits.
> > > My brief polemic about which you are now ranting and raving...
> >
> > > you choose to twist beyond reason whatever I tried very sincerely, persistently and honestly to say...
> >
> > > I would have a hard time hiring you in my newsroom. I would have very a hard time trusting you with my identity. Who knows where you might choose to slander me.
> >
> > > You, Adam, seem to represent a group of well educated individuals who are unable to manage there personal aggression, and are unable to back off once you smell blood in the water.
> >
> > I consider the above to go too far. Having already issued a warning before, I'm now going to block this "handle".
> >
> > > Apparently, those who advocate meds and the medical model enjoy the benefit of a referee here, and the rest of us can expect to be mugged.
> >
> > Well, that's one interpretation. :-)
> >
> > Bob
>
> Before I discuss this thread (from an "I seem to have missed this flame war, but boy is it interesting reading" perspective), I'd like to ask a question of Dr. Bob and anyone else who knows more about psychology than I do. "Help-rejecting complaining" is listed among the common defense mechanisms in one of the appendices to DSM-IV (the appendices are definitely the most interesting part of that book). My question is: what purpose does this behavior serve? How does it defend?
>
> On to my thoughts (which you're all of course free not to read if you're sick of this topic - I just found this discussion too interesting not to comment):
>
> Isn't it ironic that bobb accuses Adam (of all people!) of uncontrolled aggression? I think so. I'd go so far as to say it is plain bizarre. Or not: twisting reality so as to style oneself as the downtrodden victim and another as the evil aggressor can sometimes be an effective way to get sympathy, to get people "on one's side." (Attacking someone for being educated also tends to set off my BS alarm.)
>
> Uh-oh, I guess that I've just given bobb license to spew vitriol in my general direction for daring to make observations about his behavior - for focusing on an individual (especially this incredibly deep and complex individual - how dare I, unenlightened scum that I am?) rather than on "larger" problems. Well, that's okay. It has always been a weakness of mine that I am intrigued by the darker side of humanity as exemplified by particular behaviors. And, as someone (Cam, I think?) observed, how can one feel compassion for large groups when one does not recognize the importance of individuals who make up those groups? I think that bobb's focus (obsession?) on political problems is a red herring.
>
> Bobb seems to consider himself especially insightful (e.g., he feels he understands The Truth which others here refuse to see) and thrives on pointing out others' faults (or perceived faults). It's been my observation, though, that "insight" which is directed at others only, never at oneself, is no insight at all.
>
> So I guess what I'm trying to say is that "It" *is* about you, bobb. It is not possible for it to be otherwise, even if "It" is about something else as well.
poster:Adam
thread:34648
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000603/msgs/35880.html