Posted by Cynthia M on May 17, 2000, at 15:38:16
In reply to Re: Rage and Cutting Revisited, posted by Janet on May 17, 2000, at 10:46:28
Thanks both of you so much for your amazing support. I was just at my therapist and her reaction is that I am setting myself up for yet another "Lable" of border-line personality disorder. Like I am doing this on purpose, so I guess I have to not tell anyone- people don't handle this well. I am surprised that my husband is not arguing my decision to stop all of my meds.( he sees me as a drugged zombie) I am angry at the "system" for convincing me that I need them more than anything. I am playing the "game" and I am still not well. I have had it.I am tired of not being the person I want to be. I use to enjoy things, now all I do is go to psych appointments! These people are not my life! If I put as much effort into weight loss as I do to psychiatry I would be thin! I have a family that is depending on me to hold it together. Somewhere , somehow, in the deepest recesses of my brain there is the ability to handle what God has given me. I just have to figure out how to access it.Maybe I could substitute sex (pleasure) for cutting(pain) I don't think my husband would mind and it can definitely be as theraputic and not as scarring.I am rambling- day one- no meds. Should I be holding my breath?
poster:Cynthia M
thread:33767
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000517/msgs/33794.html