Posted by Ian on September 15, 1999, at 6:53:27
Thanks jamie and dj for your comments. Being sceptical of a lot of psychopharm I felt I'd probably outstay my welcome here but I couldn't 'leave' as there's much more to this board than views on medication. Its a brilliant thing this board, there's a real sense of comunity and that in itself is therapeutic. Its good to have a place where you can talk about depression and not risk losing friends by boring them to death by it.
As far a hippocampi go I don't know any more than my second year neuroanatomy which is that it is basically a coiled up extension of the cortex very involved with memory and closely associated with the limbic system ande thereby emotion which makes sense as anything emotionally significant is easily remembered normally.As for having a clear mind I'm not so sure, being a doc everyone presumes that. I've had two things happen to me which have seemed to change my subjective reality. The first I previuosly mentioned which was being coerced into taking dothiepin at age 13 for school time misery. Its a drug used in the UK and I have'nt seen any references to it on this site, I think it has been introduced in the states as dosulepin. After that time emotionaly I felt stifled and slightly blunted. Didn't stop me though. Second thing was halfway through med school trip to Amsterdam with girlfriend it was rather emotionally charged and I had a panic stricken spacecake experience that I feel I've been compensating for ever since. My fairly sharp visual/conceptual mind deserted me rather and things I could grasp easily before became out of my reach. In order to remember things I've compensated by becoming a very serial type person linking a to b, b to c, c to d. abcd don't stick out clearly in the front of my mind,paper has become my brain for the sake of prioritising things. I managed to qualify and I guess most people look at that and think "well ther can't be too much wrong with him if he can do that" but as I'm sure Bob can verify a junior docs brain is often a long list of paper with things to do on it.
So these to things happen and I feel they must be some how related in Amsterdam one of the first things I wanted to do was cry and I couldn't then came the frightening thought roller coaster ride. I feel emotional catharsis protects the intricate working of cognition and when its all to much then the floodgates open either as rage or misery. This is all unscientific conjecture but its the only explanation that makes any sense to my self other than the fact I may be deluded. I'd appreciate top tips on amelorating cognitive hazes. I know the sensible things to do exercise, medication, no alcohol although I feel I'm turning into a drone regimenting my life for a 20% improvement. I'd be realy interested to here whether there is anyone else out there who feels a tricyclic AD has had a permanent effect on the way they feel, I have second hand information that I'm not the only person to experience this.
Right off for that run then...
poster:Ian
thread:11593
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990914/msgs/11593.html