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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 2, 2007, at 17:10:49
Ah, it so seems to be the nature of the beast doesn't it.
I will fully admit that this fall is my fault - I quit taking my prozac, and now I sit here almost crying - a mound of work on my desk and a sadness in my heart that is overwhelming.
Fortunately, my mentors at work both suffer from illness (one physical, one mental) and they understand how much harder it is for us.
I know that this is transient, I know that this can and will be controlled, but it is hard.
On the other hand, it is like an old friend - this feeling and I welcome it back. I've learned to forgive myself the small stuff - forgetting meetings, not eating, memory loss, leaden paralysis, crying.
It is like a homecoming for me - after so long feeling good. I fight it, but this feels so normal to me.
I wonder if I stopped taking my meds so I could return to a feeling I know?
It's a tough call. The sleep is wonderful thing.
I'm meeting my boyfriend tonight for a sushi dinner and I will have to be the natie he knows - which I can do, but underneath there is the true natie- suppressed by medication and therapy, but always always there.
Wish me luck
N
Posted by Dinah on August 2, 2007, at 17:27:12
In reply to Falling into the black hole again., posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 2, 2007, at 17:10:49
I think probably both Naties are "true". It's the depression fooling you into thinking only this one is.
Did you start taking your meds again?
It's always a temptation to go off meds, or at least to me it is. To see what will happen, who I "really am". But I take my glucophage for diabetes without really thinking about it.
Posted by B2chica on August 3, 2007, at 10:41:20
In reply to Falling into the black hole again., posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 2, 2007, at 17:10:49
glad work is understanding for you N...but
i (as i think many) understand about finding comfort with the depressed you...i REALLY do, and have to be careful of the lure, but i have a dysthymic personality and am SO use to the feelings. and i guess i lived with depression more years than i had medication for it...i learned to adapt. BUT, i have to remember that i cant control it, and ya i may have that '''comfort zone" feeling for a while but that soon fades into a crippling depression that i cant get out of and many times at that point cant even ask for help...so its important that i stay on top of it...
as i hope you do.and like Dinah said...it's tempting to go off meds to see if you can "make it without".
...i do like how you've chosen the word "homecoming"...it is a description i can relate to well.
and i LOVE sushi...enjoy...
again agree with dinah....i think Both nate's are the true one.
please reconsider going back on meds...or talk to doc about trying a different one..
best wishes...
b2c
Posted by OzLand on August 4, 2007, at 13:30:36
In reply to Falling into the black hole again., posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 2, 2007, at 17:10:49
I know it is so nice to be off med's and to want to feel okay without them. Notice I did not say good, but just okay. Good can be scary if you haven't felt good in a long time.
I thought I would be okay going off the Parnate just this past week, but I am a mess again and cry at the drop of a pin. Oh sure I can hide it too but am at home now doing a report because I am so much more inefficient when I am starting to get really depepressed. So, I started back on the Parnate the other day, and all the stuff that happens with Parnate when one starts up on it in the beginning is happening again--the being tired in the middle of the day, the dry mouth, the insomnia--no I can't say I have insomnia. I just can't seem to sleep more than four hours straight. I hate it. I want a nice 8 hours of sleep.
So, I would think going back on the antidepressant is okay. My husband pooped out on Prozac and rather than try something different, his gp who prescribes it has him on something like 80 mg. per day. I really wish he would go see a psychiatrist as he is on heart medications and also on cholesteral medications.
Personally, I like feeling NOT depressed or at least not so serioiusly or profoundly depressed as I can get. Mild I can handle. Moderate I don't want either. Take care.
OzLand
Posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 6, 2007, at 7:53:38
In reply to Falling into the black hole again., posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 2, 2007, at 17:10:49
SO I'm back on the prozac. Basically I lost a whole week with the start-up anxiety, but I feel pretty okay right now.
I'm still sleeping a lot, but I know that is the prozac (and not depression) and that it will pass.
I've got a lot of work to catch up on and hopefully I will make a dent in it today - sometimes you just have to cut yourself some slack I guess. I'll get it done.
Anyway, thanks to all that posted. It would be nice to be off the meds, but it's just not going to happen.
I'm on my way back out of this hole and I'm very encouraged that I'm feeling better.
I hope this continues
Natie
Posted by B2chica on August 6, 2007, at 8:21:44
In reply to Sorry I haven't responded earlier, posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 6, 2007, at 7:53:38
((((((((((nate))))))))))
very happy to hear. you sound better already.
This is the end of the thread.
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