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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Phillipa on July 26, 2007, at 22:16:29
Lurpsie are you okay tonight? I'm worried about you? Love Phillipa
Posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 26, 2007, at 22:29:01
In reply to Lurpsie?, posted by Phillipa on July 26, 2007, at 22:16:29
I'm okay.
I played a game earlier called "lie in bed and fly"I got myself nice and dissociated and dreamed that I was flying far far away from my sorrows.
I between this I sobbed ferociously.
now I'm exhausted
thanks for your caring
((((P_)))))
-Ll
Posted by Phillipa on July 26, 2007, at 22:56:02
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? » Phillipa, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 26, 2007, at 22:29:01
Lurpsie please be safe for me? Love Phillipa crying isn't bad it's healing. See your're starting to heal.
Posted by muffled on July 26, 2007, at 23:21:47
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? » Phillipa, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 26, 2007, at 22:29:01
HEY!
I know how to fly too.
Cept I flip onto my back and fly on my back looking up at the sky. Is THAT weird or WHAT!!! LOL!
Thanks that you keep us babblers updated.
Damn I so wish i could somehow magically make this pass faster and easier for you.
Flying is good.
I'd forgotten bout flying, its cool.
When next T appt?
Let us know how geodon reduction goes.
I'm gonna goto cave later.
Mebbe I'll get Damos to take my ikids, he's done that B4. Then it'll just be adult me, and adult me is very calm and competant, so you can sit with me and feel my competant calm vibes, or.....we can play w/kids, sometimes its funny. But have to play in the mossy place, no playing in the cave.
I find I have to make a conscious effort to geto mossy place, but for some reason, I just 'arrive' at cave, its sorta weird.
Do you still have your cat?
If so, hows it doing?
Goto run
Take care,
Muffled
Posted by Damos on July 26, 2007, at 23:52:45
In reply to Re: Lurpsie?, posted by muffled on July 26, 2007, at 23:21:47
Hey Muffled,
Was just passing and remembering what a lovely time it was when your ikids came to stay. I'd be glad of their company - anytime. Promise to take the gooderest care of them I can.
(((((((((((Llurpsie)))))))))))
(((((((((((Phillipa)))))))))))
(((((((((((Muffled))))))))))))
(((((((((((Babblers)))))))))))Know that everthough I might not be here, I'm never very far away.
Posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 27, 2007, at 11:59:34
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? » muffled, posted by Damos on July 26, 2007, at 23:52:45
sluggiest of mornings.
dreaded my pdoc appt.today he was genuinely responsive though. I felt like he heard me. decided to switch from geodon to abilify and add small dose of zoloft. hallelujah!
maybe I'll get anti-depressed again
Thanks you all for worrying about me. I had to have H drive me to my pdoc and later on my T appt. I'm not safe to drive right now. And I haven't hurt myself in 64 hours. That's good.
If things get really bad again, I might fly some more. I kind of think that T is going to have a turning point today. When I finally get around to saying some of the hard stuff. Stuff about terminating with my former T. Stuff about being lonely and about this readjustment to living with my husband. it's really hard right now and I've been holding back the emotions for so long. No wonder I've been cracking up.
I thank all of you, so much, for helping me and giving me strength to make it through all of this. I cross my fingers that the med changes give me a little jumpstart and that I can turn that page with my quieT. I am certainly a quietLlurpsie lately (IRL- in babbble I'm LOUD and NEEDY) people turn off the a/c to hear me talk. i mumble. ((((muffled)))) is that what muffled is like?
nice to hear from you Damos, and I think muffled and I have a date to make chains of wild violets down near the mossy spot. You want to come? You can just watch if you want.
-Ll
Posted by Phillipa on July 27, 2007, at 12:17:31
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? update, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 27, 2007, at 11:59:34
Lurpsie so glad you're feeling better update on T today okay? Love Phillipa
Posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 27, 2007, at 15:49:16
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? update » LlurpsieNoodle, posted by Phillipa on July 27, 2007, at 12:17:31
Talked about husband's reaction. T suggested that we bring him in for a few sessions. (kicking and screaming, I'm sure)
Then to my lack of feelings
then to cutting. i told him the how what where why. he was good about it. not judgemental. no stupid puppydog pity eyes either. I can't stand it when people do that.
but... I dissociated major time. started staring at this one spot on the carpet and drifted away. and pulled myself back again and couldn't remember what we were talking about...
then I told this story about this horrible thing that happened to me once, and i was totally like a robot saying it. and drifted off too. looking down at myself in the office. heard myself saying it. but not feeling it at all.
told t i was not really feeling anything right now. that i was off in la la land.
he said the nicest thing "It's okay if you couldn't feel it, because I could"
sigh... at least one of us in the room has emotions.
-Ll
exhausted.
Posted by muffled on July 27, 2007, at 16:53:10
In reply to How T went today » Phillipa, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 27, 2007, at 15:49:16
> Talked about husband's reaction. T suggested that we bring him in for a few sessions. (kicking and screaming, I'm sure)
**Aaaaccck. Maybe he could talk to hubby w/o you there in the room????
> Then to my lack of feelings**I know your tired, but what did he say bout that?
> then to cutting. i told him the how what where why. he was good about it. not judgemental. no stupid puppydog pity eyes either. I can't stand it when people do that.
**well I guess if he has had some experience he's bound to have come across SI before. Glad he responded well.
> but... I dissociated major time. started staring at this one spot on the carpet and drifted away. and pulled myself back again and couldn't remember what we were talking about...**hey thats my fav way, i just stare at carpet and then everything starts to fade..
> then I told this story about this horrible thing that happened to me once, and i was totally like a robot saying it. and drifted off too. looking down at myself in the office. heard myself saying it. but not feeling it at all.**I'm glad you can remember some stuff from your appt, I would miss entire appointments, and thats rather disconcerting, plus it feels wasteful...
> told t i was not really feeling anything right now. that i was off in la la land.
>
> he said the nicest thing "It's okay if you couldn't feel it, because I could"**WOW! DOUBLE WOW! WHAT a WAY cool thing to say! ((T))
> sigh... at least one of us in the room has emotions.
>exhausted.
**Yeah, dunno what it is bout dissociating, but it is exhausting...utterly.
Thanks for update and glad you went and that it went reasonably well.
Keep us in the loop.
Muffled
Posted by Phillipa on July 27, 2007, at 19:00:48
In reply to How T went today » Phillipa, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on July 27, 2007, at 15:49:16
Lurpsie good idea about hubby. And sounds like you did a great job. I was once told when you tell a bad story and are unemotional about it it's intellectualizing. I do this a lot. Love Phillipa ps you know when nursing a a patient died you still had to continue with your other patients so it the death gets stuffed down inside. Hence problems today too much stuffing and not feeling.
Posted by Phillipa on July 27, 2007, at 19:03:48
In reply to Re: Lurpsie? » muffled, posted by Damos on July 26, 2007, at 23:52:45
Damos you haven't posted in the longest time still cold there or warming up? Love Phillipa
This is the end of the thread.
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