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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by ClearSkies on June 18, 2008, at 16:50:03
I am struggling mightily with Babble at the moment. Please Be Sensitive and all. Well, duh, I thought I was being sensitive - I agonize over writing posts as never before. And as for BEING sensitive, I am the poster child :-)
So here's my list of the pros and cons of Babble and Me
Pros
I have made new friends on Babble IRL that I would not have made overwise
I have gained insights into many different aspects of mental illness that I didn't know before
I have learned more about the actions of psychopharmaceuticals (this also belongs on the con list, according to my previous pdoc I think)
I have learned how to express my thoughts in a more civil manner, at least according to the rules of this site - but I've noticed a definite spillover IRL as people have mentioned that I show great tact in how I express myself (um, refer to the Please Be Sensitive and the con list on this one too)
My keyboard skills have improvedCons
I have never suffered more than I have while reading some of the posts here because of being triggered and also having been sucked into some vortices of attacks, and that has had lasting effects
I take greater pains at composing my posts than ever before, yet I still managed to earn a Please Be Sensitive - and then had my notification to the administration about the rap on my knuckles, and comments from likeminded members of the community go uncommented on by the administrator of the site - more salt in the wound
Abandonment, abandonment, abandonment
Being a thread killer
Not being able to contribute to discussions because of my increased sense of self censorship
Inability to leave without great anger or hurt being feltWhat exactly am I getting out of continuing to attempt to participate here? More wounds. More triggers. More of a feeling of having reached a complete dead end. Yet I don't feel capable of moving on. I'm stuck. I love to read, love to learn. I enjoy the lack of dancing emoticons and avatars that other sites employ, as well as that counter that elevates the posters to varying states of poobah-hood depending solely upon how many times they hit the "submit" button. Puhleeze.
Stuck. Not happy. Not willing to let it go.
Posted by obsidian on June 18, 2008, at 20:57:33
In reply to Babble and Me, posted by ClearSkies on June 18, 2008, at 16:50:03
yours was a carefully thought out post and any reply I might give will feel inadequate on my part
just wanted to say....
I think sometimes you just have to say what you feel is true.
please be....just who you are
I'm sorry you're having a rough time right now. I have always appreciated you.
Posted by ClearSkies on June 18, 2008, at 21:13:11
In reply to Re: Babble and Me » ClearSkies, posted by obsidian on June 18, 2008, at 20:57:33
More than adequate, Sid. The words were crying to get out of me. I really am trying to come to terms with what to do here. There's a tempest in a teacup over on Admin. I've sent a bunch of notifications, probably will get slapped for that too. But right now I'm stinging.
Looking over my shoulder lest I be called mean. Sure, I'm mean. A long time ago, I divorced an abusive husband after 18 years of a not always unhappy marriage and then cut off all contact with him - I'm a mean one, alright. Some things can't be done gracefully. I'm not being very grace-full right now, and I keep getting reminded of it.
Let me go, let me go.
Posted by llurpsienoodle on June 18, 2008, at 21:57:27
In reply to Re: Babble and Me » obsidian, posted by ClearSkies on June 18, 2008, at 21:13:11
CS,
thanks for your words, you are a very considered, considerate person. I don't believe that you are mean. I think you have principles, and feelings, and sometimes following one gets you in trouble with the other.Your presence here is invaluable, at least to me. You have made such a big difference in my quality of life, and I feel immense gratitude that you have 'stuck it out' on babble, just from my own selfish perspective.
I like teacups.
I'm gonna give you a pbg
Please Be Gentle, clearskies, on yourself-Ll
Posted by muffled on June 21, 2008, at 0:48:44
In reply to Re: Babble and Me » ClearSkies, posted by llurpsienoodle on June 18, 2008, at 21:57:27
CS.
I understand.
I understand its hard to get away.
Do it in bits.
Slowly move away.
Its hard.
I miss babble, but I move away.
Ya, the admin sucks(NOT deps).
I DO NOT understand Bob.
Its driving me away too.
Too bad.
Take good care and I hope you can do what you need to do to take care of yourself.
M
This is the end of the thread.
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