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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by verne on September 6, 2004, at 23:26:45
It all began two days ago when I tried zoloft for the first time, and it made me very agitated. The next day I talked myself into drinking to deal with the zoloft "hangover" (I've gone months, even years without alcohol but haven't done very well since April). Zoloft was a lame excuse but I went with it.
Into my sixth beer, my judgment impaired, I decided to harvest some morning glory seeds from my garden, grind them up, and put them in tea. I had read online that there's something mildly hallucinogenic in the variety of morning glories I have growing in my garden.
I read reports that 50-100 seeds may cause nausea, and to get the desired effect, you would have to take more than a hundred and be sick to your stomach first. Since I had a high tolerance for LSD in my hippie days, I went with 400 seeds. (I'm the mad scientist when it comes to experimenting on my body)
I felt something almost immediately but it had way too much of that old-acid strychnine feeling and I never got to the "good part". I needed about a dozen more beers to deal with the head-wired-in-a-vise feeling that lasted over 12 hours. I couldn't relax and felt a lot of tension in the back of my neck and head. It was like an itch I couldn't scratch, with a yawn and a burp that never came. All in all, a bad trip with no upside.
I won't repeat this experiment on any scale. I had been eyeing the morning glories in my backyard all summer, struggling with the temptation to "poison" myself (typical borderline behavior). Once an idea takes hold I have a hard time shaking it and it's only a matter of time.
I'm sharing this to warn others and, perhaps, deter them from trying this. Many intoxicants or hallucinogens found in plants are poisonious. Or there are so many other unpleasant compounds present the ill effects outweigh any benefit.
*As a footnote, packaged morning glory seeds are treated with a mild poison to prevent misuse.
I somehow made it through today without drinking. This morning it was like emerging from the storm cellar to find my life in shambles. The previous two weeks had been very productive and things were looking up. Again, it's typical borderline behavior to sabatoge any sort of success. (I used to self injure only when something good happened to me) I realize now that I was on very thin ice all last week.
Verne
Posted by SAW on September 7, 2004, at 2:07:09
In reply to Bad Trip, posted by verne on September 6, 2004, at 23:26:45
Wow, Verne, you must have suffered. I have a drinking problem and have done some pretty stupid things with my impaired judgement, which of course, at the time, seems to be the most intelligent and the ONLY thing to do. I always regret it after.
Wishing you strength and a speedy physical recovery.
Regards
Sabrina
Posted by partlycloudy on September 7, 2004, at 7:47:00
In reply to Re: Bad Trip » verne, posted by SAW on September 7, 2004, at 2:07:09
Verne - I know just what you mean by sabotage. I thought I was the ruling master of it. My poison is alcohol. I hope you stay safe and let us know how you're doing.
(and thanks for the warning.)
pc
Posted by Jai Narayan on September 7, 2004, at 8:19:28
In reply to Bad Trip, posted by verne on September 6, 2004, at 23:26:45
Thanks Verne for explaining.
I have read about Boarderline and wondered if all my family has this diagnosis.
I appreciate hearing your experience and what you have to deal with.
So the "morning glory seed" caper....
We have a garden where we used to grow moon flowers till the news came out with all the possible ways they could poison a person. I miss the beautiful flowers and the lovely scent but we have children around and well...you are right some of these plants have poison and toxins.I'm glad you survived.
Can I ask you more questions about being a borderline?
I would do this on another babble site but since my family may be impacted by this diagnosis, I am curious how to live with this.
Posted by verne on September 7, 2004, at 10:35:28
In reply to Re: Bad Trip, posted by Jai Narayan on September 7, 2004, at 8:19:28
Sabrina and pc, thanks for your kind words. My poison is alcohol too. I'm still picking up the pieces after this latest plunge. I don't normally drink 18 beers in one day. I'm also still feeling the effects of the seeds - everything appears to be melting or vibrating. But it always took a few days for things to stop moving when I took acid (many years ago)
Jai,
I'd be happy to share what I know about borderline personality disorder. You may have to give me a few days. My mind is blank and I'm groping in the dark today. What forum is for talking about diagnoses?
Verne
Posted by justyourlaugh on September 8, 2004, at 17:12:48
In reply to Re: Bad Trip, posted by verne on September 7, 2004, at 10:35:28
your post brought me to tears
i am not alone
thankyou for sharing
jyl
Posted by Jai Narayan on September 8, 2004, at 22:34:08
In reply to Re: Bad Trip, posted by verne on September 7, 2004, at 10:35:28
I really don't know which forum is right for our discussion. Maybe psychology?
You are so kind to consider helping me out with my concerns.
See you on social or psychology?
I hope you are doing alright?
This is the end of the thread.
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