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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 1:04:24
Guys, I'm getting desperate again.
I have two midterms on the 4th and I haven't really started studying for them yet. I'm getting desperate. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I can study enough. I didn't study today. I don't think I'm studying enough. I think I need to do something drastic...
I don't know what to do. I think I think I need to OD again, I dunno. I don't know how I'm going to pull this off. There are no options. I haven't studied enough, I've been procrastinating. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do! I have to study, but I don't think there is enough time, I don't think I can pull myself together to cram. If I OD, I don't want to go to the hospital again...I don't want to miss classes. I just need more time, more time to study, but I have enough time to study! I'm just a lazy bum, just procrastinating until things get desperate like I'm realizing right now. But, if I don't OD, no one will give me a note, but getting a note is a bad idea because keeping on track of studying is a good thing.
What am I going to do people? What am I going to do? Can I get activated charcoal without a prescription? I don't want to die, I don't. I just need more time!
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 6:14:10
In reply to I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 1:04:24
Posted by gardenergirl on September 27, 2005, at 7:19:58
In reply to Re: OK again (nm), posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 6:14:10
Glad to hear it.
Take care,
gg
Posted by Tamar on September 27, 2005, at 8:08:28
In reply to I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 1:04:24
> Guys, I'm getting desperate again.
DON’T PANIC!
> I have two midterms on the 4th and I haven't really started studying for them yet. I'm getting desperate. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I can study enough. I didn't study today. I don't think I'm studying enough. I think I need to do something drastic...
Have you done no study at all, or just too little?
If you’re doing some, how many hours per day? How many hours do you think you should be doing?
If you’re doing none at all, what are you doing instead?
I think it’s sensible to be very honest with yourself about what you’re actually doing. Even if you’re not doing much, doing a little is better than doing none at all. If you’re doing none at all, you need to think about why. Are you distracted by other things you enjoy? Or are you procrastinating because you’re afraid?
Maybe you’re actually doing plenty, even if it doesn’t feel like enough.
You can’t get back the time that has gone. But you can make good use of the time you have left. You have a week. It’s enough time if you use it wisely.
If necessary, lower your standards. Do you really need to do well? Or do you just have to pass? If you just have to pass, then aim for passing.
And also… if you fail, it’s not the end of the world. That can be difficult to believe. But failure is usually something from which you can learn. If you’re afraid of failure, sometimes experiencing it makes you realise it’s not as bad as you expected (after the initial shock). And you can find ways of ensuring you don’t fail again.
If you expect a lot of yourself, then you might worry you’ll let yourself down and then you might procrastinate because you’re worrying and it can become a vicious circle. Be honest with yourself: what do you expect of yourself? What do you think other people expect of you?
When you need to study, start with something that interests you, and spend at least half an hour on it, even if you feel you know it thoroughly. It should give you some impetus to move on to something you find less exciting.
If you’re really struggling with procrastination, perhaps you can talk to someone about it. Maybe a sympathetic professor? Or are there learning advisers at your institution? Many institutions employ people who can help with all kinds of study problems. Procrastination is a common difficulty and one that you should be able to seek help with.
Good luck.
Tamar
Posted by lynn970 on September 27, 2005, at 10:40:55
In reply to I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 1:04:24
Calm down.
Study for 15 minutes at a time. Take a break and then study 15 more minutes. This is not worth an OD. You will do fine.
Luv ya Lots,
Lynn
Posted by holymama on September 27, 2005, at 12:51:41
In reply to Re: I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by lynn970 on September 27, 2005, at 10:40:55
Hi Deneb,
My name is Autumn, and I'm in school too. I think I'm older than you, (32) and I'm in Grad school with 3 kids, so it's different this time around. I did my undergraduate degree when I was young like you.Doesn't everyone feel panicked before exams? I know I used to feel like I was dying, I would get so stressed out. I've definitely learned as I've gotten older, and am going back to school for round 2 that it's not worth the panic.
You're not out of the ordinary for panicking, and you are probably not behind anyone else in the amount you've studied so far. I think most of it is just your panicked perception.
If your perception is overblown, the good thing is that you can change that over time. When you start panicing, remember that it's just your brain 'freaking out' for no good reason again. Then try to breathe deeply and move on.
It really will make no difference if you worry or not, so if you find yourself worrying, try to catch yourself. I think if you do this enough times you'll be able to change the habit.
Good luck to you. I hope you've been able to calm down and start looking at your books a little.
~Autumn~
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 18:33:49
In reply to I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 1:04:24
People, I'm really sorry about posting such desperate things last night. I just get really really stupid sometimes. Little things become life or death situations. It's horrible.
I don't think I'm one of those people to be depressed for a long time and then do myself in. I think of one of those people who do something stupid to solve a problem, but it goes too far and I die accidentally. :-(
I really thought about ODing again last night. I was freaked out about my midterms, maybe I will freak out some more.
How do I stop this insanity?!! I seriously could not see any options other than ODing and faking illness again! What the heck is wrong with me! I didn't learn my lesson the first time. I just need to study...that is all. I still have time to study.
I think I messed up my life. What the heck am I going to do once I get my degree? Ahhhh! I'm having a quarter-life crisis!
There's probably nothing wrong with me at all...that is why I keep thinking this pdoc wants to harm me, cuz he can't tell the difference between real psychosis and fake psychosis. What if mine are fake? What if it is fake and this guy gives me powerful anti-psychotics...this means he harms me!
Ahhh! I can't tell the difference anymore! Sometimes I think maybe I'm just faking things, but then sometimes I scare myself and I just don't know anymore! I just don't know! But I do know for a fact that I get really really upset. I don't know what to think anymore...please think for me.
Deneb
Posted by Tamar on September 27, 2005, at 20:01:42
In reply to Re: Lack of coping mechanisms *trigger*, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 18:33:49
Hi Deneb,
> People, I'm really sorry about posting such desperate things last night. I just get really really stupid sometimes. Little things become life or death situations. It's horrible.
It sounds really difficult to cope with. I’m sorry things are so hard for you.
> I don't think I'm one of those people to be depressed for a long time and then do myself in. I think of one of those people who do something stupid to solve a problem, but it goes too far and I die accidentally. :-(
>
> I really thought about ODing again last night. I was freaked out about my midterms, maybe I will freak out some more.Freaking out about midterms is never fun. I think you’re right: you do need to find some coping mechanisms. Are you still trying to find some therapy? That might help.
> How do I stop this insanity?!! I seriously could not see any options other than ODing and faking illness again! What the heck is wrong with me! I didn't learn my lesson the first time. I just need to study...that is all. I still have time to study.Yes, you do still have time to study. It’ll be OK.
> I think I messed up my life. What the heck am I going to do once I get my degree? Ahhhh! I'm having a quarter-life crisis!Hey, I had no idea what I was going to do until three years *after* I finished studying. I don’t think you’ve messed up your life. You know, your time as a student is supposed to be fun. There’s no need to worry at this stage about what comes after (yeah, I know I’m old-fashioned).
> There's probably nothing wrong with me at all...that is why I keep thinking this pdoc wants to harm me, cuz he can't tell the difference between real psychosis and fake psychosis. What if mine are fake? What if it is fake and this guy gives me powerful anti-psychotics...this means he harms me!
Well, didn’t you say he has 24 years’ experience? I’m not saying p-docs are infallible but generally speaking I think that experience must count for something. And I admit I know very little about medication, but it sounds as if the dose he gave you was low enough that it shouldn’t harm you. Have you been taking it? It might be just the thing you need to get you through the midterms.
> Ahhh! I can't tell the difference anymore! Sometimes I think maybe I'm just faking things, but then sometimes I scare myself and I just don't know anymore! I just don't know! But I do know for a fact that I get really really upset. I don't know what to think anymore...please think for me.
Well, if I were going to think for you I’d probably say, “Don’t be too hard on yourself, try to keep the midterms in perspective, and give the medication a chance.” But I’m not qualified to think for you, so feel free to disregard anything I say!
I hope you’ll feel OK again soon. I know you often feel OK again within a little while. But do look after yourself.
Tamar
Posted by Phillipa on September 27, 2005, at 20:09:22
In reply to Re: Lack of coping mechanisms *trigger* » Deneb, posted by Tamar on September 27, 2005, at 20:01:42
Deneb, what are you taking in school? Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:27:49
In reply to Re: I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger* » Deneb, posted by Tamar on September 27, 2005, at 8:08:28
> Have you done no study at all, or just too little?
I've just done too little. :-(
> If you’re doing some, how many hours per day?I go to all my classes (I used to skip them a LOT). I think I average 1 hour of study a day? :-(
> How many hours do you think you should be doing?
Maybe 3 would be good.
> If you’re doing none at all, what are you doing instead?When I'm not studying, I'm usually just doing nothing...sometimes I lie on the bed, sometimes I surf the web, read posts etc. I haven't been sleeping my days away these couple of day though...phew.
> Are you distracted by other things you enjoy? Or are you procrastinating because you’re afraid?I think I procrastinate because I'm afraid and then I just don't want to think about things anymore so I pretend they don't exist.
> Maybe you’re actually doing plenty, even if it doesn’t feel like enough.I wouldn't get an A right now if there was a test here right now.
> If necessary, lower your standards. Do you really need to do well? Or do you just have to pass? If you just have to pass, then aim for passing.
Well, the first tests aren't worth as much as the second tests, but I still want to do really well. I just need to pass, but I still want to do well. I just need to pass because I've already screwed up my chance for grad school, at least for now. I'm such a loser...
The pdoc I saw two times in high school was wrong...I don't have a boyfriend (or any friends for that matter) and I'm not doing well in school. :-( I'm much lower functioning.
> And also… if you fail, it’s not the end of the world.I've already failed before and it never gets easier for me.
> Be honest with yourself: what do you expect of yourself?
I expect to get As and Bs this semester. I aim for As.
>What do you think other people expect of you?
Nothing, my parents don't expect much from me.
> When you need to study, start with something that interests you, and spend at least half an hour on it, even if you feel you know it thoroughly. It should give you some impetus to move on to something you find less exciting.
That's a really good idea. I was able to get some studying done today, not enough, but better than nothing. :-)
> If you’re really struggling with procrastination, perhaps you can talk to someone about it. Maybe a sympathetic professor? Or are there learning advisers at your institution?
I'm terrified of talking to professors...it's horrible. In high school I *never* raised my hand to ask or answer a question. I had/have horrible social anxiety. Even just attempting to raise my hand in class sent my heart racing and my face blushing. I would think that I was going to just drop dead from a heart attack.
Thanks so much Tamar for all your suggestions of what to do and the questions to ask myself. That was really kind of you to do that for me. I'm sure lots of people could benefit from your advice. Thanks again. :-)
Deneb
>
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:35:50
In reply to Re: I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by holymama on September 27, 2005, at 12:51:41
Thanks Autumn
You could be right about that blowing things out of proportion thing. I often freak out a LOT before exams and I usually do OK. Sometimes I even do really well. Other times I do really really badly...but I also never went to class then..
I think just going to class helps a LOT. I learn while in class...being in class is a form of studying. At least so far I'm attending all my science classes. I must admit that I skipped one of my lectures in my psychology class, but that class doesn't count towards my degree. I still feel bad about skipping it though.
Thanks again Autumn for your advice.
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:46:42
In reply to Re: Lack of coping mechanisms *trigger* » Deneb, posted by Tamar on September 27, 2005, at 20:01:42
> Freaking out about midterms is never fun. I think you’re right: you do need to find some coping mechanisms. Are you still trying to find some therapy? That might help.
I'm not sure where to go for therapy. The counselling centre kind of just dumped me off to this replacement p-doc. I think maybe they didn't want to mess with whatever the p-doc would suggest or something.
> Hey, I had no idea what I was going to do until three years *after* I finished studying. I don’t think you’ve messed up your life. You know, your time as a student is supposed to be fun. There’s no need to worry at this stage about what comes after (yeah, I know I’m old-fashioned).
Ya, you are right, but that doesn't stop me from my freaking out episodes. :-( The weird thing is, I don't think I need to achieve much to be happy...I just want to be happy and relatively stress-free.
>Have you been taking it? It might be just the thing you need to get you through the midterms.Yes, I've been taking it. Last night I thought of not taking it because I though maybe it would harm me, but then I wanted to OD and stuff so I wanted to take it to see if it would calm me down. I think it did.
Thanks so much for the encouragement Tamar. I just hope I can do the same for you. :-)
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:48:27
In reply to Re: I'm getting desperate again... :-( *trigger*, posted by lynn970 on September 27, 2005, at 10:40:55
> Calm down.
>
> Study for 15 minutes at a time. Take a break and then study 15 more minutes. This is not worth an OD. You will do fine.Thanks for the tip Lynn...I will try that tomorrow if I run into trouble studying.
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:50:42
In reply to Re: Lack of coping mechanisms *trigger*, posted by Phillipa on September 27, 2005, at 20:09:22
> Deneb, what are you taking in school? Fondly, Phillipa
Right now I'm taking molecular biology, plant physiology and biochemistry, organic chemistry and some psychology course (interpersonal something or other :-P ).
Deneb
Posted by Phillipa on September 27, 2005, at 23:39:30
In reply to Re: Lack of coping mechanisms » Phillipa, posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 22:50:42
Wow! That's a whole load. Maybe you could cut back a wee bit next semester. And what do you want to become? What degree are you going for? Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Sarah T. on September 28, 2005, at 0:02:11
In reply to Re: OK again (nm), posted by Deneb on September 27, 2005, at 6:14:10
Hi Deneb,
I think you should spend as much time as possible at the library or some place other than home. You will be in a place where you are supposed to be studying. When you're in the library, DON'T go over to the computers and log onto Psychobabble. When you have a lot of studying to do, try to limit your time on the Internet. Perhaps you can set up a schedule where you allow some time for Psychobabble and other Internet use, but set a timer, just as if you were in a class.
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