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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 35. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by zenhussy on July 20, 2004, at 13:19:09
Do tell!!!
Posted by B2chica on July 20, 2004, at 13:50:50
In reply to Jai....what is life like as an EMPATH??, posted by zenhussy on July 20, 2004, at 13:19:09
my 2c if it's anything like what i feel, it's mostly terrible, frustrating and distracting.
-yet at times gives me my greatest gift of compassion.
B2c.
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on July 20, 2004, at 14:02:10
In reply to Re: Jai....what is life like as an EMPATH??, posted by B2chica on July 20, 2004, at 13:50:50
Posted by gabbix2 on July 21, 2004, at 1:46:42
In reply to what B2c said!!!! (nm), posted by Miss Honeychurch on July 20, 2004, at 14:02:10
Someone who embodies empathy? Obviously it's something to do with Empathy.
Posted by B2chica on July 21, 2004, at 10:30:10
In reply to what is an empath?, posted by gabbix2 on July 21, 2004, at 1:46:42
> Someone who embodies empathy? Obviously it's something to do with Empathy.
(compliments of www.webster.com)
Empathy
1 : the imaginative projection of a subjective state into an object so that the object appears to be infused with it
2 : the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner; also : the capacity for this
(can't remember where i got this explanation)
Empathic Ability
This ability is where you are actually able to feel others pain or discomfort without touching them. This is also true for those that can feel moods and emotions.
-Some people that are strong empaths are able to send out their emotions and/or pain to others.HTH
B2c.
Posted by gabbix2 on July 21, 2004, at 13:44:41
In reply to Re: what is an empath? » gabbix2, posted by B2chica on July 21, 2004, at 10:30:10
Thank you!
Posted by Jai Narayan on July 21, 2004, at 20:38:01
In reply to Re: what is an empath? » B2chica, posted by gabbix2 on July 21, 2004, at 13:44:41
Empath description
Someone who actually feels what someone else feels….
Someone who is living the other person's experience with them as they describe and/or experience it.
It is empathy to the extreme.All of my life I have had an over abundance of emotion. Finally I came upon a book that would talk about Empaths....Marion Zimmer-Bradley had a series of books that featured men and women who could see each other without talking....
it was in an other dimention.
I have never projected my feeling into things like rocks etc. That would be hard to do.My reception is with humans and other animals.
It's not a given....sometimes it's there sometimes it's not. Sometimes I have to really focus on the person or animal.
when I am doing healing work with someone or praying for someone who is dying I connect with them in a very special way.
It's hard to describe as it seems to be beyond words.
Better late than never....I hope.
Posted by tabitha on July 21, 2004, at 22:59:09
In reply to all right my computer failed me right as I was...., posted by Jai Narayan on July 21, 2004, at 20:38:01
sounds like it could be intrusive, if you can't shut it off at times. But mostly a gift, right?
Wasn't there an empath on star trek next generation? That woman with the plunging necklines? But maybe she was supposed to have ESP.
Posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 0:01:52
In reply to all right my computer failed me right as I was...., posted by Jai Narayan on July 21, 2004, at 20:38:01
Jai,
I have had this experinece, particulary when working with people in later stages of Alzheimers. Although they were not able to communicate verbally in any kind of coherent manner, I really *felt* I connected with them and understood. And then when my verbal response was to try to state or validate what they were feeling, they seemed to be comforted and calmer. Perhaps this comes out of my own need to feel like people in late stages of dementia are still *in there* somewhere, but it really felt like a connection to me.And this moment always feels like a gift from God.
I hope your abilities feel that way to you, too.
((((Jai))))
gg
Posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 0:31:27
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was.... » Jai Narayan, posted by tabitha on July 21, 2004, at 22:59:09
I understand your situation, Jai. I realized I am empathic years ago, but couldn't get anyone to perceive what I experience.
Funny, but the character from Star Trek, The Next Generation, Counselor Deanna Troi, opened the eyes of some of my acquaintances. As if having "hyperempathy" only became a real thing once someone put it on a TV show. The odd thing about that is that Troi was only half human, and the empath features only came with her alien heritage.
Do you suppose this means we are half alien??? (chuckling)
tabitha,
Yes, being empathic can be extremely intrusive. it can also handicap, if one does not realize that very few people are like they are. I was ostracized as a child in all social arenas because I was so sensitive to others' feelings. This treatment of me was the one thing which eluded my understanding.
I stretched myself very thin for the people I knew. It wasn't until years later that I understood that these people I had helped and cared so much about did not have an inkling of how I felt. Most of them were just users. I don't regret helping any of them, though.
In recent years I have managed to learn how to be social without giving myself up to everyone. It can be very difficult to stand by, knowing that someone is hurting, to restrain myself when I know that someone is a user, and worse, an abuser. My innate tendency is to respond to what I perceive, but I am finally, at age 48, capable of a type of detachment. It is something I have to consciously exercise, in order to keep myself in focus.
I was recently diagnosed (categorized) by the psychiatrist who runs the mental health department where I receive counseling. His conclusions were PD NOS (personality disorder - not otherwise specified), PTSD, OCD, Agoraphobia, and Anxiety & Panic Disorders. I believe a good deal of these have been caused, at least in part, by my hyperempathy and inability to reconcile what I feel with how the rest of society perceives and behaves. Especially the PD NOS classification. In my case, I have been labelled "weird" by my social world. PD NOS is, to me, just a place to put all us weird people who the shrinks can't otherwise diagnose, or understand. And, in my case, I am weird because I am an empath.
Posted by tabitha on July 22, 2004, at 0:41:38
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was...., posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 0:31:27
thanks for the insights. It's always been a struggle for me to read people's feelings (including my own). I've gotten better at it, but I still miss a lot. It's hard for me to imagine what it must be like having an overabundance of empthy.
Posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 0:43:24
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was...., posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 0:31:27
How sad that your gift is considered to be pathology. I don't know if I would go so far as to say I am an empath, but I am a highly sensitive person. I, too used to face ridicule from others for being hurt by things that others thought were no big deal. This feeling of being weak or weird continued until I read "The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive when the World Overwhelms You" by Elaine Aron. It really depathologizes sensitivity. It felt like it was written just for me.
BTW, I love your posting name. When I was a girl, I had a doll named "Playin' Jane". She had a redhaired pony tail (I have red hair), and she could "play" games with you by pushing down on a level and launching a ball into a game board. I think most of the games were tic tac toe type things, but it was so cool. A very special doll to me for a number of reasons.
Take care,
gg
Posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 1:12:58
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was.... » Jai Narayan, posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 0:01:52
gg,
Thank you for sharing here.I, too, believe empathy is a gift from God (who else?).
Just as with faith, I think one must exercise it to become stronger, but it is within us at conception. Part of the uniquity that is us.
Personally, I have no doubt whatsoever that you have made the connections you feel. And that those with whom you connect are aware of your gift, and appreciative of your generosity of spirit.
Although it is well into the wee hours for me I am so... pleased... to have stumbled in here that I find it very difficult to go to bed.
Time to exercise that self-control. My son will be waking me in 6 hours.
Posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 1:21:16
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was.... » just plain jane, posted by tabitha on July 22, 2004, at 0:41:38
tabitha,
From where I sit it appears you are trying, which is more effort than most people put forth.
Hang in here. I'm just guessing, but it feels like a good place to grow.
BTW, "having an overabundance of empathy" feels blessed.
jane
Posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 1:28:36
In reply to gg's gift » gardenergirl, posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 1:12:58
I am also a redhead.
Perhaps there's something in that.
Wait... no... it can't be.
My three sisters are also redheads, as are many of my relatives, and none of them stagger under the weight of their empathy.
lol
g'nite
Posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:20:20
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was.... » Jai Narayan, posted by tabitha on July 21, 2004, at 22:59:09
>> Wasn't there an empath on star trek next generation? That woman with the plunging necklines? But maybe she was supposed to have ESP.
yep i think her name was something Troy. and yes empath but also telepathy (talking with mind).
...;^)
i LOVED DATA!!!!
b2c.
Posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:31:36
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was » tabitha, posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:20:20
All you that feel you are empathic, have you mentioned it to your T's?? or anyone for that matter. do they just nod their head, smile- saying "sure you feel others feelings...ya, i believe you (sarcasm here)"
or do they take you seriously? REALLY understand?well in one of my 'word drawings' that i showed my T at the very beginning i had Empathy quite large and tangled in barbed wire near "my center"-he almost had a shocked look on his face and quickly asked "Empathy???" i just told him just that i placed it there cuz it's part of what's inside me that sometimes is very intense and it can hurt.
he's never mentioned it again, but i wasn't sure afterwards what he thinks i mean by that. i'm not sure he really understands that it's not just to empathize with someone but actually empathic. And to be honest i just left it there and didn't give detail cuz i'm not sure anyone really get's it. i've only told....two people in my life and one is dead. so that leaves one person (my close friend now) about it and he feels it too, to some degree.
What do you all think?
B2c.
Posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 11:40:08
In reply to gg's gift » gardenergirl, posted by just plain jane on July 22, 2004, at 1:12:58
You are so sweet, must be the red hair! :)
I'm glad you stumbled in here, and I certainly understand how it is hard to turn it off, once you find a place that feels like coming home. I hope you continue to enjoy Babble with all of its lovely personalities.
I've recenly been beating myself up for spending so much time online, but I think your post made me realize that there is something here that fills a need. The connection and the feelings of being understood and valued by others...Thanks for helping me realize that.
And welcome to Babble! Here's a cyber hug
((((just plain jane))))
gg
Posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 11:40:52
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was » tabitha, posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:20:20
Posted by Cass on July 22, 2004, at 14:27:41
In reply to emotional sensitivity and empathy » just plain jane, posted by gardenergirl on July 22, 2004, at 0:43:24
Dear GardenerGirl and all,
I haven't read many self-help books lately, but I'm going to buy the one you mentioned, GG. I have alwasy been very intuned with the vulnerablility or emotional suffering of others. It's excruciatingly painful. One of my earliest childhood memories is of being at school and seeing a little boy get dragged across a lawn by a dog. His foot was caught in the dog's leash and the dog was running and dragging him. I remember him crying in fear and humiliation, and it was enormously painful for me to see this. It was as if it were happening to me. I also remember adults and children around me laughing as the watched this scene. I knew I was different from them, and it was confusing.
Being very empathic was even more difficult because my unhappy mother was very hostile toward her children. She seemed to only believe the worst, especially of me. I was her last and least wanted child. She tried to teach me that I was an insensitive, unkind child, and a part of myself believed that. Consequently, I couldn't deal with the empathic side of myself. I wasn't usually able to act on it. It contradicted the identity that my mother had set for me.
Posted by TexasChic on July 22, 2004, at 14:44:29
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was » tabitha, posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:20:20
And that's the first thing I thought off when I saw this thread! That was my favorite Star Trek series.
Posted by partlycloudy on July 22, 2004, at 15:07:43
In reply to Re: That would be Deanna Troy, posted by TexasChic on July 22, 2004, at 14:44:29
I can never resist trivia. Of course you know that her mother was played by Nurse Chapel, aka Mrs. Gene Roddenbery. With those contact lenses that make your eyes all pupil.
Posted by TexasChic on July 22, 2004, at 16:34:31
In reply to Re: That would be Deanna Troy » TexasChic, posted by partlycloudy on July 22, 2004, at 15:07:43
I believe the contacts were to make her look more like Deanna. Also, Geordi was Kunta Kinte in Roots (LeVar Burton).
Posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 16:40:17
In reply to Mentioning to your T???, posted by B2chica on July 22, 2004, at 9:31:36
Dr.BOB, if it fits better could you give this thread a lift over to psych board?
thnx.
b2c.
Posted by Jai Narayan on July 22, 2004, at 17:10:41
In reply to Re: all right my computer failed me right as I was.... » Jai Narayan, posted by tabitha on July 21, 2004, at 22:59:09
> sounds like it could be intrusive, if you can't shut it off at times. But mostly a gift, right?
>
** I have had this since I was little so I am used to it and would miss it if it were to go away. Kind of like being able to hear or taste.
> Wasn't there an empath on star trek next generation? That woman with the plunging necklines? But maybe she was supposed to have ESP.
**I never watched TV when Star Trek was on....I guess that was a big mistake on my part. but I had a period where TV was not tollerated. Like right now. My TV died and I haven't replaced it.
Boo hoo....I am missing all the news of the war and the ads of people running for office....
I was being silly. I am so happy it happened now. I choose to read the news etc.
I have ESP as well.
Do you?
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