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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by attoday on July 17, 2004, at 14:33:08
I started doing some research on Lexapro because my Pdoc has made the suggestion that I consider taking a AD to help me. I found this board and I felt so sad because I related to a lot of what other wrote about agrivated depression. I don't know if that is good or bad, but I can no put a few words together with how I feel.
I'm not really sure what is going on with me. I know I suffer from depression. I'm not certain what kind of depression. My life is suffering from this depression that I've experience off and on for a few years now. Currently, I don't feel I enjoy life much anymore. I am scared that I will push away my boyfriend that loves me because of my depression and not wanting to be intimate.
I'm nervous about taking AD medication. I've taken it before and I didn't like the side effects. I took Zoloft 1st, but I was asleep more than I was awake. Then I was switched to Paxil. That felt better to me, but I gained weight, which I am very unhappy about. That is my new obsession...My weight and not being happy with my size. I stopped running and mountain biking because I moved to a new state. But as I read here the other night, this issue is probably a reaction to something else that is going on with me. I don't know exactly how to sort that out and figure it out.
I've been going to a Pdoc for about 5 weeks. I question whether he is helping me. I feel worse now than I did before... probably because I am talking about my feelings and all of these issues that come up day to day and how they relate to my past and feelings.
I don't know what else to do for myself to get better and enjoy life. I am working on codependency issues as well. I feel I am at the point where I should try meds again.
Ok.. well...
Thanks for reading... and I hope everyone is having a nice saturday.
Posted by ghost on July 17, 2004, at 16:56:08
In reply to new- needing support-depression- lexapro?, posted by attoday on July 17, 2004, at 14:33:08
I know how you feel when you say you're afraid you'll push your bf away with your depression and lack of desire to be intimate. my last bf was a wonderful guy i just didn't click with, and due to other problems (i think it's the borderline in me), i was unable to take him back once i'd pushed him away, but he was so very understanding, and tried so hard to bring back that intimacy, but ready to give me my space when i needed it. i bet your bf, if he loves you, too, will be just as willing and supportive.
is it possible for you to open up to him and at least tell him your fears? i think it helps if he knows he's not the reason you're feeling this way. i have trouble opening up, though.
moving to a new state can be a HUGE source of stress, and that could be triggering your increased depression, as well.
i have no magical words or suggestions (i'm beginning to think that's my disclaimer to everyone!) but i know how you feel. it's a pretty rotten place to be.
(((((((((attoday)))))))))
ghost
Posted by attoday on July 17, 2004, at 17:36:05
In reply to Re: new- needing support-depression- lexapro?, posted by ghost on July 17, 2004, at 16:56:08
thanks for your post ghost..
I mentioned last week that I was scared he will leave me because of my depression. He told me he loves me very much and he is glad I am here. I am glad you told me because that is a lot to hold in.
I've had difficulty with the intimacy since the beginning of our relationship. I'm just nervous about having sex... sometimes I feel like i'm hurting myself by having sex. I suppose this is the backlash from the times that I had sex when i wanted love (the codenpendent side of me).
There just seems to be so many things that are screwy with me.
Moving has been great, but it's a huge change. Even though I like living here, I find myself missing what I knew when I was in a familiar place. This place will become familiar soon..I can see that I just want to let go and someone else take care of me.. maybe then everything will be okay. that's how I feel but I know that isn't true. But as I wrote in another post, I can see that wanting someone to save me being a pattern.
Self care is new to me. No more Peter Pan's.. or ones I thought would be a Peter Pan.
This is the end of the thread.
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