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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 12:21:24
My pdoc told me something that resonated with me. I was complaining to him about feeling sluggish. He asked me how my anxiety was, and I said that it was pretty good.
He said that I probably make it through my day by running on anxiety. Now that I'm not feeling antsy and anxious, I am having problems motivating myself. He's SO right. My eyes grew wide when he said that, and I asked him- well? What should I do if I don't feel motivated? How am I going to keep going if I don't feel any pressure?
Pdoc drew the line between pdockery and psychotherapy at this point. Said that my T can help me figure out such issues.
So, I have this problem- I can use stimulants to push me over the edge from alert to antsy- and then I will get things done. Unfortunately, this reliance on stimulants leaves me feeling queasy and exhausted. Stimulant of choice = caffeine. Am I creating my own anxiety? If it feels so bad, why do I keep doing this? How can I learn to listen to my body when it says- one cup of coffee in the am. one cup of tea in the pm. I like how these beverages taste, and initially, I like the happy happy feeling they give me. But now, some 2 hours after drinking 32 oz of coffee, I am feeling really queasy and shaky and ill. Now I feel like sh*t, and worse-- because I know it's self-inflicted. I'm supposed to be learning how NOT to self-inflict bad feelings. I feel myself slipping back into this state of semi-panic, when I can hear little creepy-crawlies and my usual tremor is magnified. the pressure in my chest, etc. All the classic anxiety symptoms. ugh.
I'm a caffeine junkie. There, I said it.
what now? how can T help me with this?
-Li
Posted by Dinah on November 12, 2006, at 12:33:06
In reply to Creating anxiety in order to motivate?, posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 12:21:24
I don't know the answer, but if you find out, let me know. I've often said that my only source of energy is anxiety. Which is probably why I end up in one work crisis after another.
Have you had a sleep study done? I'm kind of hoping my problem is at least partly related to my apnea.
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 12:44:29
In reply to Re: Creating anxiety in order to motivate? » Lindenblüte, posted by Dinah on November 12, 2006, at 12:33:06
> I don't know the answer, but if you find out, let me know. I've often said that my only source of energy is anxiety. Which is probably why I end up in one work crisis after another.
>
> Have you had a sleep study done? I'm kind of hoping my problem is at least partly related to my apnea.no, I've never been in a sleep study. Both of my parents have sleep apnea, but they are both really heavy, and snore loudly. I don't snore, and my husband has never complained about my sleep breathing.
I am a very light sleeper, though. (except for these last few months when I've been taking seroquel. zonk)
My husband always told me that I won't do anything unless there's a fire burning under my *ss. I hate it when he's right.
-Li
Posted by Racer on November 12, 2006, at 15:02:24
In reply to Re: Creating anxiety in order to motivate? » Dinah, posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 12:44:29
I swore up and down that I had no problem with anxiety. I even had a panic attack when my former pdoc told me he was leaning towards that as a dx for me.
No anxiety -- it only looks that way, because I'm powered by adrenaline...
I don't have an answer. If you find one, let me know. I've got a few things I'd like to get done, too...
And ain't it awful when husbands are right?
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 15:25:01
In reply to Re: Creating anxiety in order to motivate?, posted by Racer on November 12, 2006, at 15:02:24
Okay, I'm gonna be brave. REALLY brave. I NEED to leave the house. I have no food. I have a shopping list that hasn't been taken care of in a week.
I must leave the house.
I am no longer in immediate danger of panic attack. I had to take pharmacological steps, however. I am not proud of myself today. I am really frustrated with me. f*ck it.
how does Li treat her acute anxiety? Well, first she took a bath with magnesium salts (epsom). helped about 10%. Then she took 5 mg of propanolol. Haven't taken this since my last stint as violinist extraordinaire. I feel like such a loser. An hour later, still terrified. now I've taken half of my klonopin tablet. feeling a little better. I'm just going to get ready and walk out the door in 6 minutes. If I have a panic attack, I can always come back in and put me back under house arrest.
-Li
lesson learned? I dunno. tomorrow. no more caffeine. I'm going off. cold turkey. that's right. I can't do this sh*t ever again. I ruined my sunday (probably on purpose, too...). Another triumph of hedonism over reason.
Posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 16:13:06
In reply to Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 0., posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 15:25:01
Hi Li,
I hope your shopping trip went okay. I use caffeine and so do a lot of people, I think it is one of the best legal drugs out there to get you going. But.... too much of it is like anything in life, can do harm, plus there is the withdrawal from it each day.
Caffeine as you know is a powerful drug, and I wouldn't suggest going cold turkey. It can really suck to do that, you will feel it. I would suggest going to at least half either by drinking coffee half reg mixed with half decaf, or pop, half and half, drinking the normal ammounts. I would at least do this for a week, and gradually in another week drink less caffeine.
FOr me caffeine is a fake energy, it helps me stay up at night so I can study, but for real energy I need to eat, exercise, and sleep properly and try to stay away from a lot of carbs. Do you exercise everyday? For me that is the #1 thing to do for a lot of reason, but it does give you energy, and helps with depression and anxiety.I have been feeling a lot anxiety for the last month and eventually I just crash, and the only thing that will help is a lot of sleep. Good luck, let us know how y ou are doing. ((((Li))))))
Posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 16:22:08
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 0., posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 16:13:06
I planted over 300 today, and I am too exhausted to be anxious. Don't have a yard, plant them in pots for the balcony. ;-)
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 18:18:33
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 0., posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 16:13:06
> Hi Li,
>
> I hope your shopping trip went okay. I use caffeine and so do a lot of people, I think it is one of the best legal drugs out there to get you going. But.... too much of it is like anything in life, can do harm, plus there is the withdrawal from it each day.Yes
> Caffeine as you know is a powerful drug, and I wouldn't suggest going cold turkey. It can really suck to do that, you will feel it. I would suggest going to at least half either by drinking coffee half reg mixed with half decaf, or pop, half and half, drinking the normal ammounts. I would at least do this for a week, and gradually in another week drink less caffeine.
A sensible suggestion. I've gone cold turkey at least a half dozen times and it sucks. It's a great way for me to get a migraine headache. I suppose I should stick to a half-sized cup of coffee and mix it with either decaf or steamed skim milk (misto). another alternative could be half coffee and half cocoa. that sounds nice.
I already drink a lot of green tea. Maybe I should dilute my tea a little bit, or start brewing white tea. It has even less caffeine than green tea.
By far, my diet has the most caffeine from coffee.
Okay plan:
1) 6 oz of am coffee with a "mixer"
2) green tea the rest of the dayif that goes well, I'll cut out the coffee entirely by week two.
I still like green tea. I think I can keep that under control. Somehow not so "addictive" as coffee. I dunno why?
> FOr me caffeine is a fake energy, it helps me stay up at night so I can study, but for real energy I need to eat, exercise, and sleep properly and try to stay away from a lot of carbs. Do you exercise everyday? For me that is the #1 thing to do for a lot of reason, but it does give you energy, and helps with depression and anxiety.I am trying to walk at least 30 minutes a day and do 2 strength training workouts a week. I am also avoiding all refined carbs and sugars (except for fruit).
I felt a lot better today after I walked to a distant bus stop to get the bus. I could have waited right outside my place, but I kept walking and it felt good.
> I have been feeling a lot anxiety for the last month and eventually I just crash, and the only thing that will help is a lot of sleep. Good luck, let us know how y ou are doing. ((((Li))))))Thanks for hugs SatinDoll. That's so sweet of you :)
I have to remember- Water = angel on right shoulder. Coffee = devil on left shoulder. Coffeemate = the devil's poop.
-Li
Posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 18:29:16
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 0. » SatinDoll, posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 18:18:33
It sounds like you have a good plan! Green tea has a lot less caffeine than coffee so maybe that is why it is less adictive for you.
I am glad you felt better after your walk. It is amazing how good you feel when you exercise. I know, I didn't believe anyone who said that to me, but now I have learned! When I don't exercise for a couple of days, I feel like sh*t, I feel more stressed.
When my T has a client that wants to return due to low depression due to nothing in paticular, he tells them to go exercise for a couple of weeks first, and then if they don't feel better he will see them. He does practice what he preaches! LOL Thank goodness he renewed his gym membership, now I can keep it going! lol
You sound better tonight already! ;-)
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 19:28:21
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 0. » SatinDoll, posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 18:18:33
I'm not going to lie to you- the drugs helped a lot too. On the way to the store, I still realized I was really scared and anxious, but that I just didn't give a crap (benzodiazepine?)
But yes, exercise helps. Housework counts, I think :)
-Li
thank goodness the Housewives are on tonight. That makes everything more bearable... They have even more drama than I do!
Posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 21:02:46
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 2., posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 19:28:21
>
>
> But yes, exercise helps. Housework counts, I think :)
> OH, yeah, if have the time to do it! LOL I have been a very bad housewife and I know because my DH told me so.
> >
> thank goodness the Housewives are on tonight. That makes everything more bearable... They have even more drama than I do!
Darn ! I missed it again. I never watched it before until my Adnormal Psych proff. keeps refering to it discribing different disorders and such! It is so funny because his wife watches it and he just makes fun of it, calls it a lingere show with a soap opera. But he just admitted last class that he is starting to get into it. LOL But I have been studying so I missed it !
>
>
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 21:52:54
In reply to Re: Hedonism 1 vs. Reason 2. » Lindenblüte, posted by SatinDoll on November 12, 2006, at 21:02:46
> > But yes, exercise helps. Housework counts, I think :)
> > OH, yeah, if have the time to do it! LOL I have been a very bad housewife and I know because my DH told me so.
> > >
> > thank goodness the Housewives are on tonight. That makes everything more bearable... They have even more drama than I do!
> Darn ! I missed it again. I never watched it before until my Adnormal Psych proff. keeps refering to it discribing different disorders and such! It is so funny because his wife watches it and he just makes fun of it, calls it a lingere show with a soap opera. But he just admitted last class that he is starting to get into it. LOL But I have been studying so I missed it !
> >Never fear, SatinDoll. If you go to abc dot com, you can watch tonight's episode for free. If you want to watch it without commercial interruption, you can purchase each episode on iTunes and watch it on your computer. (I think this works for PC and not just Mac. 1.99 US per episode.
Frankly, tonight's episode was very triggering for me. There is one new character who adds a lot of tension and may make our dear Orson "crack" and show his true colors to Bree.
I counted at least 4 psychopathological disorders in the dozen or so characters on tonight's show.
Enjoy!
-Li
Posted by Meri-Tuuli on November 13, 2006, at 9:51:17
In reply to Creating anxiety in order to motivate?, posted by Lindenblüte on November 12, 2006, at 12:21:24
Hey....
Okay, yes ditch the coffee, very good idea. Drink perhaps green tea (which I think you mentioned). Or at the very least just have one small cup of normal coffee/day. Coffee has other chemicals in it besides the caffine which stimulate you.
Anyway back to your orginal question. Hmmm.. Do you procrastinate alot? Let me refer you to these podcasts:
http://iprocrastinate.libsyn.com/
They're very good and I believe you're some kind of pysch grad student?? Anyway you'll find them espically interesting I think. Anyway in the podcasts he talks about 'senstation seekers' who kinda need the anxiety/adrenaline thing to get stuff done, anyway I'm not good with these things ( do geology!), just have a listen. And he also touches on depression and procrastination, something close to my heart! Or you can get the paper he refers to in the podcasts (I have a copy if you can't access the journal at your uni, although I'm assuming you can!)
Kind regards
Meri
Posted by Phillipa on November 14, 2006, at 15:34:55
In reply to Re: Creating anxiety in order to motivate?, posted by Meri-Tuuli on November 13, 2006, at 9:51:17
Green tea comes in decaffinated too. I wish I could drink coffee love it but too much anxiety. Love Phillipa
Posted by SatinDoll on November 14, 2006, at 18:20:12
In reply to Re: Creating anxiety in order to motivate? » Meri-Tuuli, posted by Phillipa on November 14, 2006, at 15:34:55
how is withdrawl for you today?
Posted by Lindenblüte on November 14, 2006, at 21:28:35
In reply to Drinking some chai tea thinking of you today!, posted by SatinDoll on November 14, 2006, at 18:20:12
I'm feeling a lot better today. Here's my caffeine consumption
4oz coffee am
8oz yerba mate amokay. here's when the problem started- I wanted to hang out with my friend, who has been SO busy at work, so I invite her for coffee. I pulled out the medium size (16 oz cup) intending to get decaf. I only was able to fill the cup up about halfway and the darned coffee tank was EMPTY. then I had to get another 4 oz of full-caff, and topped the rest of the cup up with skim milk.
In retrospect, it was a good thing, because I went to a lecture at 4:30. Small classroom. A Nobel Laureate came and sat down next to me, and started grilling this PhD student about his model and his equations and whatnot. Um, this is going to be ME in 3 mos, when I have to address this same audience. lol. Anyhoo, I was actually following at least 30% of what Dr. Nobel was saying, and the "lecture" ended up lasting over 2 hours, and I didn't get home until after 7pm. ugh.
I realize now that the twitchy twitchy is a direct effect of coffee. It is an option, not a necessity. Sometimes feeling peace in my heart is okay too. It's nice to be able to feel that.
By 9pm I felt calm and collected.
no headaches today.
Tomorrow's goal- more tea, more decaf.
I can do this :)
-Li
Posted by muffled on November 15, 2006, at 14:08:42
In reply to Re: Drinking some chai tea thinking of you today! » SatinDoll, posted by Lindenblüte on November 14, 2006, at 21:28:35
Cool thread Li.
Good point.
One time a babbler wrote that she didn't know how to function w/o a gun to her head.
Its weird to be not anxious.
Its all wierd.
Very strange world indeed.
Muffled
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