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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Blossom on March 28, 2006, at 21:25:19
Hi everyone.
Today I went to the clinic (for something else) and walked by my therapist's office. The door was open and he was sitting at his computer typing notes, his face turned away from the door. Ooooo! This is just the opportunity I was hoping for. I dashed in and said, "Hi, Uncle (firstname)!" I planted a kiss right on the top of his bald head, then I dashed back out the door.
It was a spunky act of rebellion! My T doesn't really touch much in therapy, so it was thrilling, like I was breaking the rules. The only thing was, I was hoping to get a good rise out of him, or at least, see him react some way, but he acted like nothing out of the ordinary had happened at all. Just "Hey, how are you?" So that was disappointing.
Still, it was great fun!
Blossom
Posted by annierose on March 28, 2006, at 22:05:41
In reply to I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Blossom on March 28, 2006, at 21:25:19
Trust me, he was probably reacting inside and keeping a cool exterior for you!!
Your story brought a smile to my face --- very cute and innocent enough.
But you know, the next time you see him will come the question, "So .... tell me about the kiss."
Posted by LadyBug on March 29, 2006, at 0:07:45
In reply to I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Blossom on March 28, 2006, at 21:25:19
Your post made me chuckle. You know the "kiss" will come up next time. I can't even imagine doing that. I slipped in an *end of the hour* hug once, it was not taken well and caused me to cry even harder than I was crying before I hugged her. A kiss??? Wow, you are daring.
LadyBug
Posted by Blossom on March 29, 2006, at 6:23:55
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)! » Blossom, posted by LadyBug on March 29, 2006, at 0:07:45
I know it will come up next time. I don't really care. I don't really have any strong transference for him, so whatever. I was just bein' me. ; )
The thing is, I think he knows me well enough by now to realize that. I really wouldn't be surprised if he didn't mention it at all. Maybe that's why he wasn't surprised. Hmmm.
Blossom
Posted by fairywings on March 29, 2006, at 12:26:58
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Blossom on March 29, 2006, at 6:23:55
I'm not familiar with your background, or your relationship with your T, but it sounds like he's not easily ruffled, and you've got .....well, um ....moxie?
I was picturing it in my head when I was reading your post, and I got a nice smile. I hope the next session goes well, be sure to fill us in.
fw
Posted by Deneb on March 29, 2006, at 20:26:31
In reply to I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Blossom on March 28, 2006, at 21:25:19
Wow! You kissed your T! <giggle>
Do you love your T?
I don't have any strong feelings for my pdoc/T. I like her, but I don't really need to hug her or feel anything for her really.
It's a curious thing. I don't experience much transference with my pdoc, but I think I do for the administrator here.
Teehee, I'm going to meet Dr. Bob in real life. I wouldn't kiss him, but I wish I could hug him. I wonder what would happen if I gave Dr. Bob an unexpected hug? Would that be harassment?
I think it's great that your T didn't make you feel bad after you kissed him. He sounds like a good T.
Deneb*
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on March 29, 2006, at 23:53:20
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)! » Blossom, posted by fairywings on March 29, 2006, at 12:26:58
Why did you call him "uncle"? Do you usually call him that?
EE
Posted by Blossom on March 30, 2006, at 8:56:58
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Emily Elizabeth on March 29, 2006, at 23:53:20
> Why did you call him "uncle"? Do you usually call him that?
>
> EEI don't call him that in therapy, but if I send him emails, I do occasionally call him that. I don't think he understands why I call him that. It started a while ago when he told me that sometimes female Asian clients have a hard time opening up to him, so he tells them to think of him as an uncle, since I guess in that culture it's easier to talk to a male if he's a relative, or something like that. (I'm not Asian, by the way.)
So now it's just a sort of playful term of affection that I use sometimes. I think he actually likes it. Anyway, he's never told me not to call him that.
Blossom
Posted by Blossom on March 30, 2006, at 9:01:02
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)! » Blossom, posted by Deneb on March 29, 2006, at 20:26:31
> Wow! You kissed your T! <giggle>
>
> Do you love your T?
>
> I don't have any strong feelings for my pdoc/T. I like her, but I don't really need to hug her or feel anything for her really.
>
> It's a curious thing. I don't experience much transference with my pdoc, but I think I do for the administrator here.
>
> Teehee, I'm going to meet Dr. Bob in real life. I wouldn't kiss him, but I wish I could hug him. I wonder what would happen if I gave Dr. Bob an unexpected hug? Would that be harassment?
>
> I think it's great that your T didn't make you feel bad after you kissed him. He sounds like a good T.
>
> Deneb*I do think I love my T, but not in a romantic or transferential way. If I had strong transference for him, I don't think I could have done that. I'd be too afraid of how he'd react or that he'd reject me. I used to have strong transference for him, but I don't anymore. It's nice because I feel more free to just be me and do what I feel like doing.
Blossom
Posted by dia on March 30, 2006, at 22:48:35
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by Blossom on March 30, 2006, at 9:01:02
Blossom how were you able to get past the strong transference feelings for him? That really must feel better to now not worry so much about what he thinks or feel overly self-conscious. I'm trying to get past the same thing right now it's hard!!
*Dia*
Posted by Blossom on March 31, 2006, at 9:31:00
In reply to Re: I kissed my therapist (really)!, posted by dia on March 30, 2006, at 22:48:35
> Blossom how were you able to get past the strong transference feelings for him? That really must feel better to now not worry so much about what he thinks or feel overly self-conscious. I'm trying to get past the same thing right now it's hard!!
>
> *Dia*Well, honestly, I don't know. I have to say that over the time that I have known him, he compromised the therapeutic relationship, which really shouldn't have happened. I mean that he started treating me more like a friend than a client. He shared with me about his personal life and I got to know the real him. Okay, so that really SHOULD NOT happen in therapy. But in this case, I think it helped me to get over the transference because I saw that he really is a regular guy with the same problems and personality quirks that everybody else has. He's not always nice and cuddly like a therapist is.
Probably the only reason he got away with it is that I am for the most part, a mentally healthy person right now with a wonderful loving husband and lots of emotional support from other people. I just need a bit of coaching in one particular area.
I know that may not help you figure out how to get over your own transference. I guess it's something that may go away with time as you heal.
Blossom
This is the end of the thread.
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