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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by one woman cine on November 18, 2005, at 14:38:34
Hi all,
I'm new here and came across this site while searching on the internet.
Mainly, I'm here because of a situation with a less than ethical therapist over 3 years ago. I was in therapy for 5 years with this analyst and it was one of the single most destructive relationships I have ever had. Don't get me wrong, I've moved on with another therapist and I love what I do (filmmaker), have fulfilling relationships - but this experience has left me the sick feeling of betrayal. No matter what I do, nothing can quell the rage I feel towards this person. Anyway, I'm hoping to work this out of my system somehow.
Posted by happyflower on November 18, 2005, at 14:49:33
In reply to Destructive therapists, posted by one woman cine on November 18, 2005, at 14:38:34
Are you okay with telling us what happened. I am sure somebody can help you.
Posted by Gee on November 18, 2005, at 16:46:37
In reply to Welcome to Babble, posted by happyflower on November 18, 2005, at 14:49:33
That's never easy
Welcome Babble!
Posted by alexandra_k on November 18, 2005, at 19:31:20
In reply to Destructive therapists, posted by one woman cine on November 18, 2005, at 14:38:34
hey there.
i have similar struggles.
with particular clinicians...
and with the 'system' that assigned them to me...it can be really very hard
to appreciate that sometimes people are harmed more than they are helped
and that hurts real bad and feels like such an immense betrayal sometimes because...
they are supposed to help
and in some cases
we pay them a lot of money for it.i rage sometimes...
but i don't rage anywhere near as much as i used to.
a huge part of it for me...
was my thinking on what happened
and being willing to try my hardest to construe the 'story' of what happened
in a way that leaves me feeling a little better about the situation
and leaves me feeling a little better about myself
and a little better about themso, for example
one of my clinicians who i really raged at...
well, i suppose he was trying his best
but he didn't really know what to do
(he was a human being with limitations just like me)
and he was really very overworked
and was pressured to drop my case
and...
so...
it ain't so bad.but sometimes it can take a bit to figure out an interpretation...
glad you are feeling heaps better about your life :-)
maybe... your experiences helped you learn that...
the power to get better...
was within you.
Posted by Susan47 on November 19, 2005, at 9:35:56
In reply to Destructive therapists, posted by one woman cine on November 18, 2005, at 14:38:34
> Hi all,
> I'm new here and came across this site while searching on the internet.
> Mainly, I'm here because of a situation with a less than ethical therapist over 3 years ago. I was in therapy for 5 years with this analyst and it was one of the single most destructive relationships I have ever had. Don't get me wrong, I've moved on with another therapist and I love what I do (filmmaker), have fulfilling relationships - but this experience has left me the sick feeling of betrayal. No matter what I do, nothing can quell the rage I feel towards this person. Anyway, I'm hoping to work this out of my system somehow.You say he's an analyst so you must have been in analysis, not just therapy? I wonder about analysis, having never had it, but I think it might be potentially very helpful .. what did he do that was less than ethical? Spill.. maybe you could do a film about what happened, work it out of your system that way? I'm so sorry you had a destructive relationship.. what happened?
Posted by one woman cine on November 21, 2005, at 7:38:28
In reply to Re: Destructive therapists » one woman cine, posted by Susan47 on November 19, 2005, at 9:35:56
Thanks for the warm welcome everyone. I'm just going to try to give the 50 second rundown of this for the sake of brevity - this unfortunate quagmire could fill a book.
First let me preface this by saying there was no sexual misconduct and that it was not a man but a woman. Having said that, let me also say, that this whole episode was still an egregious violation of boundaries.
Initially, I went to this therapist due to family situations and life events. It was once a week. It slowly began to turn into the 3x's a week analysis. This was done under the idea that it was "in my best interest", like of the behaviors and ideas she espoused. In fact, she needed a "case" in order to get her certification (unbeknownst to me) & it was in her own best interest I was began this enterprise. There was active deception with the anecdotes and so-called information she was telling me, which I only found out about much, much later.
Now, I know about the theories in analysis concerning "good mothering" and what that means in the analyst/analsand relationship. She too this interpretation too far. She often called me at home several times a week (without being asked by me), told me intimate details of her life - past and present, and without going into the all the details - began to further the idea she was going to be MY "good mother" - an idea she actively made real through her behavior toward me.
However, she was unpredictable in many respects & her actions were often hurtful, which she chalked up to her "style" & "oops, oh well". Despite this, therapy with her became my entire life, without thoguht or regard to anything else. & my life began a downward spiral due to this intensive and twisted "therapy". Anyway, that's it in a nutshell, thanks for your comments and ideas.
This is the end of the thread.
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