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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 2 of 2. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by messadivoce on June 29, 2005, at 14:05:29
I know that a lot of different people are sensitive about this subject, and for me it was as hard to talk about as sex!!
Anyway, I lost 25 pounds before I started college, and it was pretty much because my mom made me go to weight watchers. It helped short-term, but it didn't fix the problem inside, which was that I hated myself no matter what my weight. I got thin for my build and height, and I thought about food constantly!! Just hungry all the time.
By the time I went to therapy at my Uni, I had gained 10 of it back and had pretty much found my equilibrium. But I still felt fat. When I stopped therapy I felt much better about myself. My male T inferred that he would be a pretty shallow person if my weight mattered to him at all in that context.
When I went to my female T the next year, she turned out to be a plus-sized woman. Her confidence in herself as a person and a woman was inspiring. Not that I thought any less of her in the first place, but she was just so comfortable with herself that I couldn't help but notice. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I've learned the elementary truth that if you're not happy, weighing less isn't going to really help that much.
Now I think I've probably put on another 10 pounds from the last year of college (no time to eat healthy, or think about what I'm eating) and I'm trying to cut back (but I just love food sooooo much!!). But my point is, I feel better now than I did when I was thinner!! It's amazing. And I now have the ability to not care what my (skinny) family is thinking. Because it just doesn't matter.
My wedding is next June. I'm hoping to lose those 10 pounds or so by then, but I think this time it's going to be different because I feel different.
Posted by spalding on June 29, 2005, at 15:38:47
In reply to therapy and weight, posted by messadivoce on June 29, 2005, at 14:05:29
messadivoce, wow, what a great story of finding confidence and peace of mind around the weight issue. If I may say, I'm so proud of you!
Yes, you need a sensitive T. when you're talking about this. Your female T. sounds wonderful, I feel like I could picture her.
I am totally struggling around this issue right now. I am losing a little weight, but I am white-knuckling it. I feel guilty about eating, no matter if it's ice cream or salad. It's currently my big topic in therapy -- last session, my T. said, "You created the eating disorder -- with cause, and it served you well for a long time." I can totally see that in my case, this is true. But it's going to take a lot more work. As awful as it is to talk about sometime, I'm glad we're slogging through it. Better now than never.
messadivoce, congratulations on your upcoming wedding! It is going to be YOUR DAY, and I say, don't cave to anyone's demands or let your skinny family impinge on your happiness! Go for it with gusto!
<<There, I feel better.>>
spalding
This is the end of the thread.
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