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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by mair on January 16, 2005, at 14:56:16
I've discovered that ever since mid-Dec., I don't seem to have any urge to leave my house, although I dutifully show up for work every day as if I was actually a normally functioning professional. Ever since I managed to finally win a compensation battle I've been fighting for years, I can't focus on any one thing long enough to get anything done at work. I come in every morning and I can't figure out where to begin. I'll pick up a piece of paper, maybe do one thing with it, check my email, check Babble, play a quick game of spider solitaire, check my calendar, read some internet news, do some kid-related thing like call and make a dr's appointment, and then go back to the same piece of paper, for maybe another 15 minutes or so before it all starts again. My compensation is totally based on my production and I can't produce. I went home early on Thursday because I didn't feel well, and didn't bother to come in on Friday, ostensibly because I still wasn't feeling all that great, but I really think I would have been fine to work, if I had the slightest motivation or ability to work. I have mega bills, not the least of which is my son's massive college tuition and it's really important that I make more money than I have which is one reason why it was so important for me to have struck a new compensation deal. But it's as if that took so much out of me that I now have nothing left to actually devote to my job.
And I'm pretty sure I'm not going to have any clients left by the time I pull myself out of my malaise, if I can pull myself out. I'm starting to panic and feel less than worthless.
Posted by Dinah on January 16, 2005, at 19:23:50
In reply to I can't work (rant), posted by mair on January 16, 2005, at 14:56:16
I could have written that post. My bosses could have written that post *about* me.
You've gone through some stressful things lately. Even though you don't *feel* feel it, I'll bet you're experiencing the side effects anyway. My son doesn't *feel* feel it either, but he's having some totally unusual troubles at school. Nothing serious, but he's clearly experiencing stress as well.
Concentration is the first thing that goes for me. I can't even read the longer posts, or longer threads. I wanted to look up the books referenced above, but I'm not even sure I could take in the descriptions. Plus my sleep has been disrupted, and if I remember correctly, so has yours.
So it seems pretty normal to me, in a way, given circumstances. But if you were to ask me what to do about it, clearly I have no earthly idea.
Posted by fallsfall on January 16, 2005, at 20:57:10
In reply to I can't work (rant), posted by mair on January 16, 2005, at 14:56:16
I know that feeling.
Can you make a short list of things that you *have* to do today? And then break them down into really small subtasks (Like 1. Collect the 3 documents you need to read for client A, 2. Read the documents, 3. Write down the options for what to do for client A, 4. Make a decision, 5. Write up your decision 6. Send off email (or whatever). Really, really small subtasks. Maybe the first task for each thing you have to do is to break it down into subtasks? Make each subtask really doable (not overwhelming).
Then tell yourself that if you do the first subtask you can go get a cup of coffee. And after the second one you can play one game of solitaire. And after the third one you can do a "kid" thing. etc. Food works, too.
Even if you spend 1/2 of your time rewarding yourself, you will still be getting more done than you are now.
Make a big deal out of crossing things off your list.
Post to Babble each time you complete one of your "things" and we will congratulate you.
This is how I clean my kitchen (1. Put dishes from sink into dishwasher, 2. Put dishes from counter into dishwasher, 3. Throw away trash, 4. Put recycling away, 5. Wash 5 pans, 6. Wash 5 more pans) Actually, that's how I used to clean it. Now I can combine 1&2, and 3&4, and wash all the pans if they fit into the drier thing (if they don't all fit, then I break it into pieces). See what progress I've made?
Posted by mair on January 16, 2005, at 21:05:05
In reply to Re: I can't work (rant) » mair, posted by Dinah on January 16, 2005, at 19:23:50
Dinah, I know it's not funny but I actually chuckled a bit reading your response.
My colleagues I think have been too busy to notice. My secretary knows but she's either too nice to say much, or just too busy with all of her other office tasks to really push me. It's pretty pathetic, but it might help if she nagged more, but I'm not sure she can figure out what to nag about, and frankly I hate to bother her when she's otherwise being so productive.
My husband has noticed my desire to hibernate. He pretty much insisted we go out to dinner Saturday night because he thought I needed to get out of the house. I guess going to the trash and recycling center earlier in the day didn't count.
I can't read alot either. I got DVDs of the first season of "West Wing" for Christmas, and I honestly think I could just vege out and watch those.
I keep telling myself that I go through some unproductive periods every year, but usually I can blame those on feeling deeply depressed. I don't feel particularly depressed. I just feel that I'm coasting to no particular effect. My sleep, however, has started to get a little better.
Mair
This is the end of the thread.
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