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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Susan47 on January 11, 2005, at 14:20:57
Is a slimy, mucky, romp through a minefield of love, hate, trust, anguish, betrayal, grief... learning. It's a microcosm of living .. and it all happens between two people who've managed to build all this from the damaged soul of one.
Posted by 10derheart on January 11, 2005, at 18:30:09
In reply to Therapy, posted by Susan47 on January 11, 2005, at 14:20:57
So very well said. You have a true gift for doing that, Susan. Creating something profound out of the ordinary.
I don't know what more to add at this point. And few can render me speechless.
Thanks for writing it. It feels somehow liberating, although I'm not sure from what.
Hmm, guess I wasn't entirely at a loss... :)
Posted by Speaker on January 11, 2005, at 18:35:25
In reply to Re: Therapy, posted by 10derheart on January 11, 2005, at 18:30:09
Susan,
Thanks for saying what I have been trying to put together in my mind all week!!! "BRAVO"
Posted by gardenergirl on January 12, 2005, at 11:19:46
In reply to Therapy, posted by Susan47 on January 11, 2005, at 14:20:57
Wow, what an evocative statement. I can almost picture it.
So are you back in therapy? I forget. Considering it? Or still plodding through on your own?
gg
Posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2005, at 15:41:15
In reply to Re: Therapy » Susan47, posted by gardenergirl on January 12, 2005, at 11:19:46
Seeing a counsellor right now, don't have the heart or ability for another therapist.
Very, very depressed.
Took self off Prozac, 60 mg daily.
Need to see MD to get back on at least a minimal dose, I think.
Counsellor is doing me a world of good.
NO TRANSFERENCE THANK THE GODS.
Posted by gardenergirl on January 12, 2005, at 16:06:41
In reply to Re: Therapy » gardenergirl, posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2005, at 15:41:15
Posted by annierose on January 12, 2005, at 17:50:08
In reply to Re: Therapy » gardenergirl, posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2005, at 15:41:15
Susan -
Not to change direction of this thread (I did like your original thread-starter ... struck a chord in me, not sure why though), anyway, glad to read you are seeing a counsellor. I know how painful the termination with your T has been for you. And I felt you needed someone to help you sort through those feelings. I hope this works out for you. Annierose
Posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2005, at 20:14:23
In reply to Re: Therapy » Susan47, posted by annierose on January 12, 2005, at 17:50:08
You don't know the half of it. Nobody does. Pain is something I have to walk through barefoot with no protection. There is no protection from pain. When the pain is caused by my own self, that must be the worst. When I've allowed myself to live in a netherworld of drugs and euphoria and acted out all the slef-loathing of my childhood with a person I loved and respected and that person turned around and his soul virtually SCREAMED at me to STOP, (my therapist), the pain bit me in the face.
I feel like I'll never smile again, I'll never have a reason to. I certainly don't know how to love. I'm so incredibly needy, when I allow myself to be who I really am. Is it who I am? I don't know.Pain just is; it exists and it takes a h*ll of a lot of courage to allow myself to feel it.
THe antidepressant I took last year completely disallowed the reality of my situation to be with me.
Does anybody reading this understand? Do I really understand? I think I do, then a cloud of uncertainty settles over me and I only can cry.How did this happen? How did I allow myself to be what I've always hidden from the world, and how did I make another person so disgusted with me that I hate myself too?
I'm sorry, I'm just no good right now. Forgive me, but I am going to post this, knowing what a dreadful negative thing it is.
Posted by annierose on January 12, 2005, at 22:12:17
In reply to Re: Therapy » annierose, posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2005, at 20:14:23
Susan-
You are in such pain right now. And that is what a good T or counsellor does, helps people with emotional pain. I'm glad you are seeing someone.
It's a long road, but it's worth taking the trip.
To be left behind means that the pain will never subside, and it does, with time and a good T.Sorry you are feeling so yucky.
This is the end of the thread.
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