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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 10 to 34 of 34. Go back in thread:
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:19:13
In reply to Re: I'm very depressed tonight » crushedout, posted by daisym on December 9, 2004, at 23:24:19
Hi Daisy,I dunno. I'm OK, I guess. It's very nice of you to ask. I've been just really questioning my decision lately, to leave her. What do *you* think? Do you think I did the right thing?
Sometimes I wonder, especially when I read your posts, because there are ways that I find our Ts similar, only you present yours in a positive way and I seem to complain and gripe about mine. So of course everyone likes yours and thinks mine is trouble. But what if it's just our own attitudes about it and the way we're presenting things? That worries me.
Yeah, it's crazy, huh, that it's been a whole year since the CD. Well, almost a year. God, I miss her. I want to marry her. What on earth am I going to do?
I'm working on a (fifth!) CD for her right now. I'm not sure whether I will give it to her. I never gave her the fourth one.
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 0:26:51
In reply to Re: I'm very depressed tonight » daisym, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:19:13
Crushed I would keep her to the side and see your new T ...maybe the two years will pass faster ...ya know what I mean?
Hugs
> Hi Daisy,
>
> I dunno. I'm OK, I guess. It's very nice of you to ask. I've been just really questioning my decision lately, to leave her. What do *you* think? Do you think I did the right thing?
>
> Sometimes I wonder, especially when I read your posts, because there are ways that I find our Ts similar, only you present yours in a positive way and I seem to complain and gripe about mine. So of course everyone likes yours and thinks mine is trouble. But what if it's just our own attitudes about it and the way we're presenting things? That worries me.
>
> Yeah, it's crazy, huh, that it's been a whole year since the CD. Well, almost a year. God, I miss her. I want to marry her. What on earth am I going to do?
>
> I'm working on a (fifth!) CD for her right now. I'm not sure whether I will give it to her. I never gave her the fourth one.
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:34:58
In reply to if you ask me :-) » crushedout, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 0:26:51
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 0:37:23
In reply to please keep feeding my delusions :) (nm) » Fallen4MyT, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:34:58
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:44:21
In reply to lol crushed sometimes tis a reality :-) YES (nm) » crushedout, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 0:37:23
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:00:30
In reply to what do you mean???? (nm) » Fallen4MyT, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 0:44:21
Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 1:09:02
In reply to LOL I mean IT HAPPENS :-) (nm) » crushedout, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:00:30
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 1:09:04
In reply to LOL I mean IT HAPPENS :-) (nm) » crushedout, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:00:30
you mean we might really get married someday?
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:12:39
In reply to Oh, Fallen. Social? Your therapist? (nm) » Fallen4MyT, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 1:09:02
Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 1:14:07
In reply to Re: Oh, Fallen. Social? hahah don't ask :) (nm) » Dinah, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:12:39
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:15:05
In reply to Re: LOL I mean IT HAPPENS :-) » Fallen4MyT, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 1:09:04
>
> you mean we might really get married someday?Oh I cannot predict that but I can say it is NOT a hopeless thing ya know??? THINK LIKE ME ..ITS NOT a wash.....see a different T keep this T for pleasure or freindship ...what ever ya wanna call it ..Your new T is best as a T.
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 1:20:53
In reply to Re: Oh, Fallen. Social? hahah don't ask :) (nm) » Dinah, posted by Fallen4MyT on December 11, 2004, at 1:12:39
Can someone please fill me in on what's going on here?
Posted by daisym on December 11, 2004, at 1:43:46
In reply to I'm totally lost, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 1:20:53
Me too Crushed! I think the exchange is about whether Fallen has (is?) currently being social with her therapist or if she is just hoping. I'll let he speak to that.
As far as what you are doing...from what you've written over the past year, I think you have made a wise choice to try to get some perspective on this. You are hurting so badly. Unrequited love is the worst feeling...
I don't disagree that it is impossible to judge someone's therapist based on what we write here. And we write how they appear to us or what they actually do. I honestly don't know if your therapist is providing support and caring or encouraging something else. It is true that my therapist encourages me to lean on him, but holds a pretty firm framework for how we do that. I'll think about it some more and let you know. Take care of yourself.
Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 1:54:13
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » crushedout, posted by daisym on December 11, 2004, at 1:43:46
Sorry. Didn't mean to be obtuse. I was asking Fallen about her thread on Social.
My poor therapist. He's going to get yelled at on Tuesday for something someone else's therapist did again.
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 2:48:01
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 1:54:13
you're mad at him because fallen's t is being social with her?
Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 7:13:00
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » Dinah, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 2:48:01
Well, sort of. He frequently gets some backlash from therapist behavior on board.
It goes something like.
"Xxxx's therapist quit suddenly." (reproachful and indignant look) "And you're afraid that I will quit suddenly?" (glance away) And then we talk the whole thing out.
What I suppose I never do, and for darned good reason, is be angry with him about what the things I like about other therapists. I suspect it would go something like
"Yyyy's therapist called her to check on her because he was worried about her." (Reproachful peek) "I know that you know how to reach me if you wish to speak with me." {cooly} and downhill from there.
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 11:47:39
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » crushedout, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 7:13:00
Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 14:13:12
In reply to Did I ever tell you that you're funny? (nm) » Dinah, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 11:47:39
Do you think you two could convince my husband?
Posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 14:20:01
In reply to Fortunately he thinks so too. » crushedout, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 14:13:12
if he doesn't know already, it seems pretty hopeless.
Posted by Aphrodite on December 11, 2004, at 15:33:56
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » crushedout, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 7:13:00
Why don't you say the comment about Daisy's . . .er ...excuse me, I mean Yyyy's therapist calling to check on her? Would he become defensive?
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 12, 2004, at 0:11:24
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » Dinah, posted by crushedout on December 11, 2004, at 2:48:01
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 12, 2004, at 0:12:55
In reply to Re: I'm totally lost » crushedout, posted by Dinah on December 11, 2004, at 7:13:00
but i think its cute how you do that :)
Posted by Dinah on December 13, 2004, at 6:04:27
In reply to Dinah do not yell at your T :-), posted by Fallen4MyT on December 12, 2004, at 0:12:55
Why shouldn't I yell at him? All too many therapists seem to decide to jeopardize their licenses and their relationships with their many clients this way. No harm in letting him know that if your therapist is my therapist, I'll be standing in line behind his wife to tar and feather him for being so cavalier about his many responsibilities and commitments. And while it's likely that your therapist isn't my therapist, given the state of the psychiatric community, it doesn't hurt to remind him of the ramifications of any actions he might undertake.
Posted by Dinah on December 13, 2004, at 6:07:36
In reply to Why not? » Dinah, posted by Aphrodite on December 11, 2004, at 15:33:56
At any rate it would become a source of yet another discussion about the inequality of how important we are to one another. I think that issue is pretty much talked out. It's just one of those realities of life that you just deal with.
Posted by Fallen4MyT on December 13, 2004, at 22:25:44
In reply to Re: Dinah do not yell at your T :-) » Fallen4MyT, posted by Dinah on December 13, 2004, at 6:04:27
But Dinah the odds are your guy isn't my guy..I do not know what state you are in but that would be like me yelling at some guy cause say Ms NoName's hubby hit her...But I would say if it helps vent just dont yell at him like its him :)
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