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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by mattw84 on November 18, 2004, at 23:29:28
Hey all!
Sometime I feel like the whole therapy thing is really just an enormous emotional burden that has only helped me learn to look at the bad parts of my life that I had ever-so effectively learned to ignore! I am currently seeing my Pdoc on a weekly basis, and I spend most of my time now in between sessions recovering from the last. For example, the recent theme has been my social phobic (avoidant even...) behavior pattern I have established.
I'll say that 'so-and-so' called me and I didn't answer the phone, haven't talked with 'so-and-so' in a long time. I have 'so-and-so' new phone number so I should call and say I -- but I don't feel like the same person they called to talk to. Time and time again the pdoc asks me "what" is stopping me from calling. Each time I go into the whole I am 20 years old and still stuck with the parents, not doing anything with my life... etc She tells me not to keep beating myself up and what not, and gives me goals; like to call 'so-and-so' before my next visit (Next Tues). At this very moment I would love to call 'so-and-so' but instead I am on here! Why!?!?!? What am I missing? What am I so damned afraid of? Worst case my fears come true -- I am not who they thought I was anymore; rejection is no biggie.
It just feels like I am going around in this circle and getting all emotionally bent up after each session. I finally recover and can be at the least friendly and "normal" at work and deal with customers and then I have another session and haven't called 'so-and-so', have no good excuses, and go through the same series of questions with the same answers.
Any suggestions are much appreciated, hell, if you read the whole thing thanks for that! Probably making too much out of insignificant things here, but I appreciate your feedback! Thanks PB'ers!
Matt
Posted by Susan47 on November 19, 2004, at 0:27:38
In reply to Just let it flow? Plan? Am I missing the point?, posted by mattw84 on November 18, 2004, at 23:29:28
Who's so-and-so? One person in a particular?
Posted by cubic_me on November 19, 2004, at 7:33:48
In reply to Just let it flow? Plan? Am I missing the point?, posted by mattw84 on November 18, 2004, at 23:29:28
I don't think it's you that's missing the point, but your pdoc. She seems to be setting you goals (that you already know that you would like to do) without trying to find out why you find it so hard. It sounds like she is saying 'ignore that you have a social phobia and just do it', that's like saying 'I know you have no legs, but climb everest anyway'.
Could you try explaining to her that you can't do it, and you don't know exactly why, but would like some help with that? Or you could print out your post and show her, so that she knows a little of what you are feeling. That would also show her how much this affects you between sessions.
cubic x
Posted by sunny10 on November 19, 2004, at 8:48:47
In reply to Re: Just let it flow? Plan? Am I missing the point? » mattw84, posted by cubic_me on November 19, 2004, at 7:33:48
I agree with cubic_me. There are too many times when pdocs or T's tell you to "just do it", but don't really understand what prevented you from doing it in th first place.
Matt, you are paying these people, either through cash, insurance, or government subsidies. If they want YOU to work for them, ask them to give you the currency you need to do the job- TOOLS, KNOWLEDGE, SELF-UNDERSTANDING, you know what I mean. You are not paying them to make you MORE anxious! It seems that they want to "act tough" to you. To get you to be tough. Well, be tough with them! They are the ones making these demands that are making you more anxious.
Gosh, did I just tell you what to do, too??? Sorry, I was just trying to arm you with ammunition , in case you need it.... Of course you have my permission to ignore me, anxiety-free !
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