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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by DaisyM on May 27, 2004, at 20:41:28
I think it is important to recognize the natural markers of time passage and pause and take stock of things. The end of May marks the close of my first year in therapy. This amazes me because in some ways it feels like I've been doing this forever, and in others, like I just truly got started.
I still struggle with so much of what being in therapy means. Does taking this long mean I'm really messed up? Or is this "normal?" I'm terrified My Therapist will get bored or tired of all this, but that terror is less and less these days. I had very big worries about what the end of the first year would bring. We've spent some time talking about those worries, especially the one that says I'm supposed to be done. You'll know, he tells me. Stop watching for it.
I also struggled with knowing how to express my gratitude to him within the "boundaries" of the therapeutic relationship. I know helping me is his job. But as I reflect over the past year and the up and down course of this process, I also know that I was blessed to find him. I'm convinced that I would have driven someone else crazy by now. Learning to trust has been so hard and learning to open up without editing has been even harder.
So, I found a funny little card with a cute little girl of about 5 on it, totally decked out, red boots, a hat etc. on a pay phone talking. I told him that this was how I felt when I called him. And I gave him two little gifts that symbolize how I think and feel about the last year. One was a mini-book of quotes about beginnings which I said was full of words -- to represent things that he has said and that have stayed with me -- and the other was a beautiful journal that has no words -- to represent his belief that we can continually rewrite our personal stories.
I was a little nervous about giving these to him. I've heard stories about therapist and gifts. But I'm happy to say he loved them and the card, especially the journal because he does keep one. He noted their symbolism too...
I just had to quip that I did hope that I wouldn't be marking 5 years together, no matter how much I like him! He laughed. :)
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on May 28, 2004, at 10:02:50
In reply to I made it a year, posted by DaisyM on May 27, 2004, at 20:41:28
Daisy,
What great gifts! I wish I had a mind for symbolism like you. Your T is lucky to have you.
My year anniversary is coming up in July. I've been trying to think of something good to do. You've inspired me!
Posted by Dinah on May 28, 2004, at 13:54:19
In reply to I made it a year, posted by DaisyM on May 27, 2004, at 20:41:28
But that's about half a house I've paid him. Isn't that enough?
Posted by DaisyM on May 28, 2004, at 14:40:33
In reply to Nine last month. I gave him nothing. » DaisyM, posted by Dinah on May 28, 2004, at 13:54:19
...and I think that is pretty terrific.
Did you do anything the first year? Maybe it is just my nature. I'm just so glad he didn't do that "how does it make you feel to give me this thing" :)
Posted by Brio D Chimp on May 28, 2004, at 18:03:48
In reply to Nine last month. I gave him nothing. » DaisyM, posted by Dinah on May 28, 2004, at 13:54:19
This is what I'm thinking about getting mine
http://www.ronandjoe.com/cheese/office/freud.html
something useful but not too personalI gave him some candy once on St Patricks day and a few cards. I used to bring him cartoons sometimes. I used to loan him books but he never read them so I quit. I used to write looooong letters and a few bad poems but I don't do that much anymore. I never really think about giving him gifts anymore. I don't know what that means.
Posted by fallsfall on May 29, 2004, at 8:16:46
In reply to Gifts for Ts, posted by Brio D Chimp on May 28, 2004, at 18:03:48
What a great gift for a therapist!!!!!
Makes me think about "What about Bob?".
Thanks for the chuckle.
This is the end of the thread.
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