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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
I have been terminated due to the psychologists situation. Sooooo, I took the referals and called the Psychology Assoc. in my state...and began the hunt. I went to my first one yesterday...after I got there I found out he does more rehab. therapy with brain injuried patients. I hate being uncomfortable especially when its a waste. What are some of the questions you would ask up front. My faith is very important to me so I want to make sure we are on the same page there or at least can respect what I believe. Do any of you have other suggestions. I have another "interview" this afternoon. I was shocked about my reactions yesterday...I ended up calling my husband out of a meeting to vent.
Posted by Dinah on November 26, 2003, at 9:48:40
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
I'm sure you've done this, but if you try googling "finding a therapist" you'll come up with lots of lists.
I don't have any firsthand advice because I took the first therapist who seemed to want to see me. Most were rather standoffish about a cold call. But maybe that was something, as it suggested a certain warmth.
Do you want CBT, someone who is future oriented, and well, CBT'ish? Or do you want someone psychodynamic, which opens a whole new can of worms as to theoretical orientation. I'd ask what their general approach is to your particular problem. If they mention correcting dysfunctional thoughts and examining your behaviors that perpetuate your problem, you know what you've got. If they mention self objects or reparenting, you've also got a good idea. If they are vague, well they're conservative then. :)
Why don't you start with a list of what you really don't want. Those are usually a lot easier to make.
(And why did your outgoing therapist refer you to one with such an inappropriate specialty?)
Posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:58:24
In reply to Re: Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek » Speaker, posted by Dinah on November 26, 2003, at 9:48:40
Dinah,
I got the name of the T. yesterday from the Psych. Assoc. Most of the referals were women and I am more comfortable with a man...which shocks everyone I talk with. I am not that informed on types of therapy so your comments are very helpful. What is CBT?
Posted by Dinah on November 26, 2003, at 10:07:27
In reply to Re: Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:58:24
CBT is a very focussed type of therapy that looks at the automatic thoughts you have and how to change them. So it might look at how you interpret events or how you think about things and try to change that.
To be honest, it makes me want to spit nails and punch the person I'm speaking to. And perhaps that has to do with the practitioners I've run across. It seems like pull yourself up by your bootstraps, you can do it, etc. that doesn't acknowledge your perceived reality and your feelings. It attempts to change those feelings by changing your thoughts. But that's just me. It's been helpful for many people.
So if, for example, you were worried about your job, it might challenge your catastrophic thinking, all or none thinking, etc. What are you thinking would happen if you were fired. What is the likelihood that you would actually be fired. What is realistically the outcome if you were. If you have pictures of destitution and family ruin, it would challenge that. That's just an off the top of my head example.
It wouldn't go into the roots of your problem, your history, your conflicts with your parents, or transference with your therapist.
Posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 10:21:10
In reply to Re: Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek » Speaker, posted by Dinah on November 26, 2003, at 10:07:27
Dinah,
Thanks, are you sure you didn't go to school for all this stuff :). I had not even thought about the internet for finding a therapist. I just went to google and am printing off 8 pgs. on types of therapy and questions to ask. I will read it in the waiting room...you are a gem! Thanks again
Posted by Penny on November 26, 2003, at 10:42:31
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
Speaker,
Something else to consider which will vary depending on your situation is insurance/payment arrangements. When I was looking for my first therapist, it never occurred to me what would happen if/when my insurance no longer covered my visits. Fortunately, my former therapist was very willing to work with me when I ran out of covered visits. When I was looking for a new T a year ago, I made sure to ask them about that. My current T said that if insurance didn't pay, she would be happy to work something out with me (fortunately, my insurance is really good about paying for therapy, so this hasn't been an issue).
It would suck to be seeing a therapist for a while only to realize that you can no longer see him/her for financial reasons. I don't know your situation, but it's something to consider, and, perhaps, easier to talk about before you have become attached!
Good luck.
P
Posted by judy1 on November 26, 2003, at 11:50:23
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
When I was terminated, I took the list my insurance provided me and called a bunch of them. The majority called me back and I spent 5-10 minutes asking questions- did they have experience treating my disorder(s), what type of therapy did they use- I like an eclectic approach (interpersonal and DBT), that type of thing. It really saved me time (and their's), but I still saw about a dozen before I found a 'perfect pick'. I also had only used male therapists, but this time mine is a woman and much more empathic than my former therp. So I try not to use gender as a limiting factor, you may be pleasently surprised. Are you near a University? If so, call the psych dept., ask to speak to the director's secretary, and ask him/her for suggestions. This was a great resource for me also.
Best of luck, judy
Posted by fallsfall on November 26, 2003, at 18:08:50
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
Do a 5 - 10 (or more) minute phone interview before you commit your time and theirs. If they won't give you that much time on the phone, then you probably don't want them anyway.
In general I found that I could learn quite a bit on the phone. With some it was really clear that we wouldn't be a match - if they didn't understand the questions I was asking, or they made me feel like they were stupid questions, or they didn't have any time available.
I interviewed 5 therapists (and phone screened more like 8 or 9). Two if the interviews were worthless: 1. I told the guy I didn't want CBT and he said he did other things, too - but when I saw him in person he did only CBT. I felt that lying to me on the phone was not a good start for a theraputic relationship. 2. Someone had told me that this woman did Psychodynamic therapy. I told her what I was looking for, and she tried to refer me to someone else in her group. I was stubborn and didn't really listen to her - and then found out in the interview that she only did CBT now (she used to do Psychodynamic). She helped me to understand my situation better, though, so it wasn't a total loss.
I also thought I wanted a woman, but I interviewed both and chose a man (and I'm happy with him). So you might want to talk to both.
A lot of people (including therapists!) think that if you have an initial session with someone that you have to stick with them. This is NOT true. You need to look until you find someone you are comfortable with. It is the fit that is important.
If you can get your initial list of people to consider from people who know you and who you trust (i.e. your pdoc, your GP, personal friends who are therapists or who work with therapists, friends, co-workers) then you will start with higher quality therapists initially.
Searching for a therapist is quite stressful. Just remember that YOU are interviewing them (they happen to be interviewing you at the same time). Ask them how they would handle a situation that you had with your first therapist (that either went really well or really badly), and see if you like their response.
Good luck.
P.S. I also sent summaries of all of my interviews to 4 of my closest friends and asked them for their opinions. I got some good insight from them.
Posted by Elle2021 on November 27, 2003, at 6:51:03
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
What are some of the questions you would ask up front. My faith is very important to me so I want to make sure we are on the same page there or at least can respect what I believe. Do any of you have other suggestions.
My faith is important to me too, so that is always my main concern. I feel that if the therapist isn't on the same page as I am on the matter of faith, they tend to give useless advice that I would NEVER take. My pdoc asked me on MY first app. with him what my faith was. He seemed super-understanding and said he respected it. So, yes, you should find one that is understanding and respectful.
Ask him what his feelings are concerning medication. I think sometimes my pdoc is far too eager to give me pills when I would rather talk.
Make sure to ask what his schedule is like. Does he attend many meetings and seminars. Is he available to his patients. Can he be flexible regarding appointment times and dates? That is so important. I have a great pdoc and can't ever get a hold of him...
Hope this helps you out.
Elle
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