Posted by fallsfall on November 26, 2003, at 18:08:50
In reply to Terminated/Trying new Therapists-eeeeek, posted by Speaker on November 26, 2003, at 9:10:32
Do a 5 - 10 (or more) minute phone interview before you commit your time and theirs. If they won't give you that much time on the phone, then you probably don't want them anyway.
In general I found that I could learn quite a bit on the phone. With some it was really clear that we wouldn't be a match - if they didn't understand the questions I was asking, or they made me feel like they were stupid questions, or they didn't have any time available.
I interviewed 5 therapists (and phone screened more like 8 or 9). Two if the interviews were worthless: 1. I told the guy I didn't want CBT and he said he did other things, too - but when I saw him in person he did only CBT. I felt that lying to me on the phone was not a good start for a theraputic relationship. 2. Someone had told me that this woman did Psychodynamic therapy. I told her what I was looking for, and she tried to refer me to someone else in her group. I was stubborn and didn't really listen to her - and then found out in the interview that she only did CBT now (she used to do Psychodynamic). She helped me to understand my situation better, though, so it wasn't a total loss.
I also thought I wanted a woman, but I interviewed both and chose a man (and I'm happy with him). So you might want to talk to both.
A lot of people (including therapists!) think that if you have an initial session with someone that you have to stick with them. This is NOT true. You need to look until you find someone you are comfortable with. It is the fit that is important.
If you can get your initial list of people to consider from people who know you and who you trust (i.e. your pdoc, your GP, personal friends who are therapists or who work with therapists, friends, co-workers) then you will start with higher quality therapists initially.
Searching for a therapist is quite stressful. Just remember that YOU are interviewing them (they happen to be interviewing you at the same time). Ask them how they would handle a situation that you had with your first therapist (that either went really well or really badly), and see if you like their response.
Good luck.
P.S. I also sent summaries of all of my interviews to 4 of my closest friends and asked them for their opinions. I got some good insight from them.
poster:fallsfall
thread:284011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031123/msgs/284222.html