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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Poet on October 24, 2003, at 9:25:14
I read my therapist what I wrote about why I disliked my inner child and how I felt I abandoned her. She said that I didn't really abandon her, I just pushed her away because she reminded me that I didn't get the love and attention I deserved as a child.
Then we did guided imagery: my T told Big Me to imagine I'm watching Little Me playing with a favorite toy. T said, go sit next to her, play with her. I said, I can't. She said, then I'll go sit with her. Imagine I'm sitting right next to her, if she wants she can come on my lap (I couldn't imagine that!) I'm reading her a story...Big Me started crying- a first in therapy.
T said to remember the image and feeling of warmth and caring and keep it inside me where I can call it up when I need it.
I'm sorry that I couldn't imagine Little Me sitting in my T's lap, though snuggling up next to her felt so good. I think my problem is that Big Me wants to push Little Me out of the way, I want to be on her lap and be read to.
Poet
Posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 9:38:03
In reply to Inner Child part two, posted by Poet on October 24, 2003, at 9:25:14
Wow - powerful stuff, eh?
Well, I'm glad you were able to at least imagine snuggling up to her, even if not sitting on her lap. I would have a problem with that as well.
Now, the challenge is going to be trying to connect with that feeling of warmth and security. For me that would be hard on two counts - one, b/c it would make me miss my T more when she wasn't there, and two, it would mean lowering my defenses somewhat and allowing my vulnerable (child) self out into the world a bit. Not sure I could do that right now. I'm hoping you can, you are certainly making some good strides in therapy right now!
BTW - my T said something the other day about not making me do the 'empty chair' thing when I was talking about my grandfather. I thought of you.
P
Posted by bubblechild on October 24, 2003, at 16:46:51
In reply to Re: Inner Child part two » Poet, posted by Penny on October 24, 2003, at 9:38:03
Thank you for the continuation of this thread. Your T seems to be personalizing the difficulty you are having in caring for your inner child. I can understand how that can seem painful and comforting at the same time. As in reading your post, that's how it made me feel.
I wonder if one of the reasons we dislike our inner children is that they can possess attributes we were told, as children, were offensive. In my home it was emotions, weakness, vulnerability, and needyness. We seal up these children as protection, in our desire to be accepted. Personally I do not feel my inner child is deserving of the care your T offered.
After telling my T once, that she has been the only person to really see my inner child, she thanked me for the privledge. That totally blew me away. It never occured to me that anyone would ever want to see that child-let alone, thank me for sharing her. (although I did tell my T that I was sure she was trained to say those things! lol.
My T has used terms like "reparenting" but I find that so difficult to even understand. I am slightly closer to that understanding than I was last year!
<sigh> oh well........((((hugs)))))and thank you for bringing this discussion to the forum.
Posted by Poet on October 25, 2003, at 10:35:54
In reply to Re: Inner Child part two, posted by bubblechild on October 24, 2003, at 16:46:51
Bubblechild,
<I wonder if one of the reasons we dislike our inner children is that they can possess attributes we were told, as children, were offensive.
You are definitely on to something. I have always buried emotions, except anger, a trait I got directly from my mother.
I don't think my inner child was worthy of the caring and attention my T gave her, but my T would say that's because I didn't get the nurturing I needed.
My inner child sends hugs to your inner child.
Poet
Posted by bubblechild on October 25, 2003, at 17:21:10
In reply to Re: Inner Child part two » bubblechild, posted by Poet on October 25, 2003, at 10:35:54
((((((poet)))))))) I was told the exact same thing by my T. Are you sure we're not related? lol
This is the end of the thread.
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