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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
I recently finally went to see a psychologist (instead of the therapist I saw briefly last fall and summer). I don't know if they are just trying to make money off me or if I'm sicker than even I imagined, but my husband is so freaked out that for the first time in our marriage I really worry. I took some personality tests, and gave him (the psychologist) a brief history of my past.
I have (no significance to the order and nothing has been 100% confirmed yet - I haven't gone back yet either) 1-social anxiety disorder, 2-bulimia, 3-bipolar, 4-paranoia, 5-obsessive compulsive disorder, 6-problems with co-dependency, and 7-low self-esteem, 8-some postpartum depression, 9-PMDD, 10-avoidant personality. No wonder I feel like such a loser and freak. No wonder people read strange vibes from me and back off. I know I need help. I'm just so embarrassed and ashamed. I'm afraid to tell my parents. It's hard to believe but they think I'm fine and wouldn't even guess how *ucked up I am! I've been so depressed lately I haven't even read this board for a month or two. Understandably, my husband hasn't taken this too well. He has already had enough from me. Miraculously, my two little girls seem unscathed. I have tried so hard to not get upset around them.
How could I have gotten by all this time seemingly OK? Why has everything crumbled since my two daughters were born? The bad things that have happened to me all occurred up until around age 25. I'm 36. Why now when it looked like everything was finally under control? How come I didn't freak out then? I know the psychologist should answer that but I'm terrified to go back. It's like it's going to really confirm how messed up I am.
Posted by noa on March 18, 2003, at 19:21:24
In reply to How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
Don't worry so much about the list of labels. To me, that doesn't mean you have so many different disorders, but probably one disorder with a number of features to it. The main thing is find a therapist and pdoc for some good treatment--meds and therapy, probably. Work on things one step at a time.
You must be a great mom!
Posted by Dinah on March 19, 2003, at 4:09:58
In reply to How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
Noa is completely right. I'm kind of surprised they hit you with that list all at once. My therapist has always tried to do it more conversationally, rather than throwing DSM-IV diagnoses around. At any rate the DSM-IV diagnostic method is unbelievably arbitrary and doesn't reflect real life situations well at all. Overlap between diagnoses is unbelievably common, as is not quite fitting a particular diagnosis.
Don't let the labels get you. You are the same person five seconds after getting the diagnosis as you were five seconds before. You are uniquely you. The human brain is far too marvelous and complex to reduce to a set of diagnostic codes.
Posted by Dragonslayer on March 19, 2003, at 6:51:34
In reply to How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
And sometimes, they're wrong ! I know that probably isn't helpful, but it is true. I agree with the above written stuff, too. Be kind with yourself !!
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:37:19
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by noa on March 18, 2003, at 19:21:24
Thanks Noa,
It's hard to shake the labels when my husband deals with people who act accordingly with many of my labels. When he complains about them I'm afraid that he's thinking the same about me. It's my family that I'm worried about. My mother considers me the only one whose life seems normal. I'd hate to ruin the charade. I know that she would feel like a complete failure and I don't want to do that to her.
Thanks for the encouraging words.
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:49:42
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have » WorryGirl, posted by Dinah on March 19, 2003, at 4:09:58
> Noa is completely right. I'm kind of surprised they hit you with that list all at once. My therapist has always tried to do it more conversationally, rather than throwing DSM-IV diagnoses around.
Dinah,
This psychologist is a friend of a friend and I brought everything that I had acquired from seeing my former therapist. My friend had already asked him to give me the tests because I really wanted to know everything that is wrong with me. Now I'm freaking because it's worse than I thought. I'm sure some of these disorders can bleed into another, as you said, and my husband thinks that it's probably not as bad as I think, but this was hard enough for me just to go. To make matters worse, my husband is not a fan at all of pdocs and meds. He thinks they are a temporary crutch for people who are weak and/or defective. Well, I guess I'm both, whether he likes it or not. I'm trying to save this marriage while he still loves me (and thankfully he does).>At any rate the DSM-IV diagnostic method is unbelievably arbitrary and doesn't reflect real life situations well at all. Overlap between diagnoses is unbelievably common, as is not quite fitting a particular diagnosis.
>I know that I need for him to be able to assess my life situation. I just don't know if I can handle opening up again. When I started to open up with my former therapist (I mean REALLY starting to open up!) he sort of backed off. I swear, it was like he really didn't want to hear about some of the stuff I was trying to tell him. He wanted to fixate on what he perceived as the immediate problem at hand, my social anxiety. I'm surprised that he didn't want to know about my bulimia, or abusive ex-boyfriend, or abusive ex in-laws, etc. Almost the second I brought it up he shhh'd me with "we really need to work on THIS problem".
> Don't let the labels get you. You are the same person five seconds after getting the diagnosis as you were five seconds before. You are uniquely you. The human brain is far too marvelous and complex to reduce to a set of diagnostic codes.
Thanks for your kind words. I know how stupid I sound (I forgot to mention stupidity as one of my best traits!) As sorry as that attempt was at tongue in cheek humor, I sometimes feel that this knife gets duller every day. Getting older stinks. I miss the allowances people seemed to make for everything when I was younger. I'm trying, though!
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:50:53
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by Dragonslayer on March 19, 2003, at 6:51:34
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:52:01
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by Dragonslayer on March 19, 2003, at 6:51:34
Posted by noa on March 19, 2003, at 16:53:04
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have » Dinah, posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:49:42
Worrygirl, some thoughts:
Choose a therapist who will work with you on how you want the therapy to be conducted. Friend of a friend might be too close to home, no? Discuss right up front with a new therapist the problems you had with previous one and ask how he/she would deal with those issues.
The labels/diagnoses are only helpful if they're helpful! I mean, to the extent that using them helps to define the problem in a way that helps point to strategies for dealing with them, then they're useful. Otherwise, they're just words. Remember, these categories are just organizing constructs made up by people to try to help understand people's problems. Even those that have been linked to biological findings may overlap or be incomplete explanations for the problems.
Meds are helpful with symptoms and often don't necessarily correspond with one diagnosis vs. another. They treat the symptoms, not the categories.
Take care!
Posted by amy_oz on March 19, 2003, at 17:57:29
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have » Dinah, posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 10:49:42
Worry Girl,
Its amazing how you go through many trials and then fall apart afterwards in seemingly good times. Its like the body and mind has a resilience to cope with the stress while its occuring and when you finally "relax" you reaise how much was simmering under the surface. I've hads a very similar experience and have since been given the labels; major depression, ptsd, panic disorder, bipolar, SAD, GAD, agitated depression.......All of them describe some of my symptoms cause each of the diagnoses overlap significantly but none of them describe me as a person.You need to learn how to treat the symptoms and learn positive thought/life patterns for the future. Its possible that that was what your therapist was trying to do by concentrating on the current symptoms of social anxiety. Or maybe your therapist only wanted to deal with one thing at a time.....
I've found that its useful to talk to the therapist about the kind of approach that they will take with your case so that i have more of an idea where they are coming from. I'm very lucky to have found one who is open with me and wants to work with me and not for me.
I've certainly found it useful to discuss past experiences to see what kind of distructive patterns they have set up for me now. Its the hardest thing I have ever had to do but hopefully it will be worth it.
Thanks for listening to my rambling..Good luck and many hugs to you.
Cheers,
Amy
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 20:22:00
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by amy_oz on March 19, 2003, at 17:57:29
Thanks Amy,
That meant a lot. Knowing that you have had similar labels and possibly experiences comforts me.
Maybe that was what my former therapist was trying to do when he seemed to be focusing on the social anxiety, just take things one step at a time. He probably wasn't anticipating me walking out the door and never returning.
Somehow I feel that I do need more than a therapist, and a psychologist will be a step in the right direction. Now, to find the right one...
Thanks again.
Posted by WorryGirl on March 19, 2003, at 20:27:08
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by noa on March 19, 2003, at 16:53:04
> Choose a therapist who will work with you on how you want the therapy to be conducted. Friend of a friend might be too close to home, no? Discuss right up front with a new therapist the problems you had with previous one and ask how he/she would deal with those issues.
>Hi noa,
Even though this therapist doesn't know me personally, he does know a few people who know me, so you have a point. I'm thinking of looking for a different one and just explaining to my friend that I'd prefer a female or some other excuse. Because she is really trying to help me out I don't want to rain on her parade.
> The labels/diagnoses are only helpful if they're helpful! I mean, to the extent that using them helps to define the problem in a way that helps point to strategies for dealing with them, then they're useful. Otherwise, they're just words. Remember, these categories are just organizing constructs made up by people to try to help understand people's problems. Even those that have been linked to biological findings may overlap or be incomplete explanations for the problems.
>
I've calmed down more about the labels now thanks to the responses I've received. It's amazing how the perception of things can change almost drastically from day to day.> Meds are helpful with symptoms and often don't necessarily correspond with one diagnosis vs. another. They treat the symptoms, not the categories.
>
At this point I feel that meds are going to have to part of the solution. I'll probably start with Paxil.Thanks again!
Posted by noa on March 20, 2003, at 16:19:59
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by amy_oz on March 19, 2003, at 17:57:29
Posted by shawna on March 24, 2003, at 7:56:31
In reply to How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
> I recently finally went to see a psychologist (instead of the therapist I saw briefly last fall and summer). I don't know if they are just trying to make money off me or if I'm sicker than even I imagined, but my husband is so freaked out that for the first time in our marriage I really worry. I took some personality tests, and gave him (the psychologist) a brief history of my past.
> I have (no significance to the order and nothing has been 100% confirmed yet - I haven't gone back yet either) 1-social anxiety disorder, 2-bulimia, 3-bipolar, 4-paranoia, 5-obsessive compulsive disorder, 6-problems with co-dependency, and 7-low self-esteem, 8-some postpartum depression, 9-PMDD, 10-avoidant personality. No wonder I feel like such a loser and freak. No wonder people read strange vibes from me and back off. I know I need help. I'm just so embarrassed and ashamed. I'm afraid to tell my parents. It's hard to believe but they think I'm fine and wouldn't even guess how *ucked up I am! I've been so depressed lately I haven't even read this board for a month or two. Understandably, my husband hasn't taken this too well. He has already had enough from me. Miraculously, my two little girls seem unscathed. I have tried so hard to not get upset around them.
> How could I have gotten by all this time seemingly OK? Why has everything crumbled since my two daughters were born? The bad things that have happened to me all occurred up until around age 25. I'm 36. Why now when it looked like everything was finally under control? How come I didn't freak out then? I know the psychologist should answer that but I'm terrified to go back. It's like it's going to really confirm how messed up I am.what is a belimia test?--this i have never heatd of.
the fact that you take so good care of your two girls that they have been unscathed, as a mother i can tell you this would rule out social anxiety disorder, maybe social anxiety but not as a disorder.
also true bipolar , obsessive compulsive and true parinoia.
a man would berate me for stating this but as a mother i know what it takes to raise children, what all they and we go thru, what they pick up without our knowing emotionally etc...so i state the previous in all sincerity.
these test by their very nature are made to be "sensitive"
you may have normal concerns such as if a question was on a test and it asked are you suspicious of people, you put yes, and in real life you work for an investigative agency or your husband has cheated on you then this question in relation to your life should not flag parinoia, but because this is a battery that is given to a whole populus and has not been tailored to you...it will! they try to weed these indescrepencies out by supplimenting other questions on down the list to prclude or exclude but on the borderline cases this does not work...that is why these tests are only a suppotive means for the doctor to use in his diognosis and not the diagnosis itself although i have seen some lazy doctor syndrome for which this has been done and taken as gospel.
at any rate do not worry to much as these tests do not prclude in themselves a pathological condition.
the fact that you were given the illness names, that you could have ,presumtiousely tells me that i would definetely seek another doctor as that is bad medicine number one and that he may be using these test as a diagnosic instead of a means of retreaving information to help make a diagnosis upon further doctor patient investigation.
Posted by WorryGirl on March 24, 2003, at 8:38:31
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by shawna on March 24, 2003, at 7:56:31
> what is a belimia test?--this i have never heatd of.
Shawna,
The psychologist I saw is a friend of my friend and had already been told about my bulimia. Knowing this, he gave me a brief questionnaire asking me questions about my eating habits. This confirmed my bulimia, which was the only obvious illness I have anyhow (obvious to me in that I know what I do to myself even if others can't see what I'm doing).> the fact that you take so good care of your two girls that they have been unscathed, as a mother i can tell you this would rule out social anxiety disorder, maybe social anxiety but not as a disorder.
I am only hoping they are unscathed. So far they show no signs of behavior that would cause any concern, although my three year old has often asked me why I was crying and I told her I was sad because I missed Daddy when he is out of town or some other reason I could think of. They are one and three years old, and because I don't get out much (only for my three year old's gym class and that is torture because of the social anxiety).
The social anxiety disorder is 100% confirmed. It had been confirmed by the therapist I saw for a few months last year and was brought up again my this psychologist when the test showed a high likelihood for the disorder. No one had to tell me I have social anxiety disorder anyway. When I am around others I absolutely freeze. I can barely talk, I shake, and feel such immense fear that people think I'm weird, crazy or both and avoid me, which I prefer. When I am around anyone outside of my family and my two or three long-time friends, I feel incredible feelings of inadequacy and am afraid that I don't measure up. I'm afraid that everyone is talking about me and scrutinizing me finding me to fall short in everything. I prefer to stay locked up in my house all day even when I am so bored I can't stand it. Sometimes I'll take the girls to the park but I feel so uncomfortable around the other mothers that I have to leave. You see, they are making fun of me behind my back and think I'm a pathetic loser (in my mind anyway).
> also true bipolar , obsessive compulsive and true parinoia.
I tested high in all of these disorders, apparently because of the way that I answered the questions. What I tested low on was schizoid, histrionic, and narcissistic personality, among others. It doesn't appear that I have borderline personality either. I haven't gone back to the psychologist yet, but my friend recently told me that the test he gave me merely showed what I had tendencies toward these disorders and nothing had been 100% confirmed until I talk with him further.
My severe and unpredictable mood swings that often last for days seem to be indicative of bipolar. I'm paranoid that my husband is having an affair, that people are "out to get me" and want to hurt me just because they don't like me, etc. I'm obsessive-compulsive about many things. When I shop online, start a hobby, talk on the telephone, or even read (I'll read 50 books on a subject I'm interested in when two or three would be sufficient) obsessively. When I decide to clean, it's all or nothing. Before I had kids, I'd clean for over 24 hours, continuously finding something wrong that needed to be cleaned. I'm always afraid that I have left the house unlocked, the stove or iron on, etc. and have gone back to the house several times to "make sure". Now when I get the urge to clean I do it at night when the kids are asleep and often won't sleep all night. The rest of the time the house is in constant disarray which I'm ashamed of.
I'm terrified of confrontation of any kind. I run like hell and have even left a store or situation right in the middle of the transaction when I felt that someone was looking at me in a bad way or giving me an unkind attitude. When someone is truly mad at me I want to hide behind closed doors and can't face them.
No, I don't know that I have these disorders 100% yet, but I have a pretty good idea of the outcome and am terrified to go back. I'm afraid the pdoc will think I'm one of those really bad nutcases who only appears somewhat normal on the surface. My biggest fear is of crying in public.
> a man would berate me for stating this but as a mother i know what it takes to raise children, what all they and we go thru, what they pick up without our knowing emotionally etc...so i state the previous in all sincerity.I can only hope that my girls haven't already picked up some negative stuff from me. My husband is justifiably concerned that they may have even though they don't show any signs yet. I hope it doesn't come out when they're older. And if I came out sounding like I'm this terrific mom it wasn't exactly how I meant for that to come out. What I meant was that it amazes me that they do appear unscathed so far. There are days when I feel like the biggest failure in the world and have zero tolerance for things they do sometimes. I've never physically abused them but I have raised my voice to my three year old, but always apologized afterwards and hugged her and told her how much she was loved and wanted. I don't my kids to hear the kind of things I heard growing up.
> these test by their very nature are made to be "sensitive"> you may have normal concerns such as if a question was on a test and it asked are you suspicious of people, you put yes, and in real life you work for an investigative agency or your husband has cheated on you then this question in relation to your life should not flag parinoia, but because this is a battery that is given to a whole populus and has not been tailored to you...it will! they try to weed these indescrepencies out by supplimenting other questions on down the list to prclude or exclude but on the borderline cases this does not work...that is why these tests are only a suppotive means for the doctor to use in his diognosis and not the diagnosis itself although i have seen some lazy doctor syndrome for which this has been done and taken as gospel.
> at any rate do not worry to much as these tests do not prclude in themselves a pathological condition.
> the fact that you were given the illness names, that you could have ,presumtiousely tells me that i would definetely seek another doctor as that is bad medicine number one and that he may be using these test as a diagnosic instead of a means of retreaving information to help make a diagnosis upon further doctor patient investigation.
>Thank you for all of these words and I am going to go see another doctor anyway, because I don't feel comfortable knowing that he knows my friend. I specifically asked if I could take the tests you were talking about and he gave it to me immediately on my first and only visit then we briefly talked about the results. He said that he was concerned about the results and that we would discuss them more on my next visit. That's why I was so terrified. Plus he said that I would need medication and he would have to further determine what I would need. I'm afraid of taking medication, as well.
Thank you again - I greatly appreciate your input. You and everyone else who has responded has helped me feel better about everything. Although I don't know what my true diagnoses are yet, I do know there is something wrong. But to know that there are others who understand and can often give helpful advice does make a difference.
Posted by stjames on March 26, 2003, at 14:07:12
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 24, 2003, at 8:38:31
Sounds like you took the MMPI. The MMPI is an aid
to understand and help diagnose the patient. But it is in no way a diagnosis, by itself.
Posted by WorryGirl on March 31, 2003, at 19:26:07
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by stjames on March 26, 2003, at 14:07:12
> Sounds like you took the MMPI. The MMPI is an aid
> to understand and help diagnose the patient. But it is in no way a diagnosis, by itself.Thanks. I actually found some great tests on mytherapy.com. They, also, don't claim to diagnose but I felt better after taking them. It is probable that the main things I'm dealing with are anxiety (generalized and social), bulimia and bipolarII.
Posted by Mama Bear on April 1, 2003, at 22:05:11
In reply to How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:17:09
You sound like you have been through alot. Are you on any medications? If you are this could be part of your problem. Have you ever read the book "Your drug may be your problem?" It is by Dr. Peter Breggin. It is an awesome book. A must read for anyone thinking about medication or already on medication. Neuroleptics and other psychiatric medication can make the problems that you had worse than before meds. We often have the misconception that these psychiatric drugs are curealls. This is not the case at all. Please read this. It is a must. Mama Bear
Posted by WorryGirl on April 2, 2003, at 16:21:38
In reply to Re: How many mental illnesses can 1 person have, posted by Mama Bear on April 1, 2003, at 22:05:11
> You sound like you have been through alot. Are you on any medications? If you are this could be part of your problem. Have you ever read the book "Your drug may be your problem?" It is by Dr. Peter Breggin. It is an awesome book. A must read for anyone thinking about medication or already on medication. Neuroleptics and other psychiatric medication can make the problems that you had worse than before meds. We often have the misconception that these psychiatric drugs are curealls. This is not the case at all. Please read this. It is a must. Mama Bear
Thanks for the book recommendation. I have been trying to find the right pdoc this week and am still looking. I do believe I'm going to have to have medication. I've been trying a few "natural" remedies - everything from flax oil tablets to exercising. They help, but when I get really down or anxious I can't get motivated to exercise so knowing I need to do it isn't much help!
This book may help with what possible meds I might need (or don't).
Thanks again.
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