![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 21 to 45 of 45. Go back in thread:
Posted by holymama on January 12, 2006, at 3:14:19
In reply to I re-read all your messages, posted by Deneb on January 11, 2006, at 23:32:00
Deneb,
Hi! I found a lump in my breast in my mid twenties. It scared the bejeezus out of me until I saw a specialist.
What I learned from him is that I just have lumpy breasts!! The lump that I had sounds like yours, small and firm and moved under my skin. He said the kind of lump that moves is not usually anything to worry about. It's the kind that seem attached and don't move around that are more worrisome. Sorry, not very scientific terminology, but those are words to remember for both of us.
Good luck, Deneb, with keeping your anxiety down. Remember there is a reason for everything and perhaps you will gain something positive from a little health scare.
~Autumn~
Posted by JenStar on January 12, 2006, at 10:16:10
In reply to I re-read all your messages, posted by Deneb on January 11, 2006, at 23:32:00
Deneb, you're going to be OK. It's VERY low possibility of cancer, OK? You're going to be FINE. :) Keep in mind your youth, your health history, your family's absence of breast cancer, and the fact that there are many other reasons for lumpy breasts. Even if it were cancer, you're finding it early and there are great treatments. But I don't think it is cancer, OK? (I mean, I know I'm not a doctor, and I'm not psychic, but I really think you're going to be OK.)
Please try not to stress. I know it's hard, but you ARE going to be OK. Take it easy on yourself!
JenStar
Posted by Racer on January 12, 2006, at 13:22:58
In reply to Re: This is where your thinking skills *Trigger*, posted by Deneb on January 11, 2006, at 21:27:14
> Sigh, I just did some research and it seems the statistics don't look good
Why on earth would you do that, Deneb? You do know that that's just torturing yourself, right? You don't need to do that -- why buy trouble when you can get so much for free?
Again: use your thinking apparatus. You've seen a doctor, who said it was a benign cyst. You've made an appointment to see a doctor you trust. You've calmed yourself down using some skills you're trying to learn, and they've worked.
So why are you going back to read more and freak yourself out more? You do know that you're going to freak out by reading those things, so why do it when the idea is to calm down and get through until the next appointment?
> I think I always knew that I would die young.
Here's a reality check, Deneb: it's a heck of a lot more likely that you WON'T die young, so you better figure out a way to work through these things now, so that you're not still living crisis to crisis when you're 40. Trust me, that ain't what you want.
It's very easy to say, "well, it doesn't matter, because I'm going to die young." But you know what? That's a very immature attitude to take. It's much better to make an effort to improve your ability to cope, so that you can be happier for all those years when you look in the mirror and say, "How the [expletive deleted] did I ever manage to get SO OLD?" I do that many mornings.
And Deneb? If you read back through the archives, about two years ago, I was told that "the radiologist says that the tumors in your liver look malignant. That means cancer." There's no question, it is frightening, it will freak you out, and that's normal. But once a doctor who has examined you tells you that the lump you found is a normal lump, it's time to move on. You're doing the right things, getting an appointment with your own doctor, etc. Now move on.
Posted by Racer on January 12, 2006, at 14:44:14
In reply to I re-read all your messages, posted by Deneb on January 11, 2006, at 23:32:00
I forgot to ask, when I posted earlier, how it went with your family doctor?
Here's the thing, Deneb: even if it may seem as if I'm hard on you, I do care what happens to you. I want to see you doing well, and I know that it's possible for you to do well. Some days I'm doing badly myself, and other days I want to shake you so that you can hear what I'm trying to say. But on any of those days, I still care what happens to you.
So, how did it go? What did your doctor say? Did she show you how to do a self-exam? Did she describe what different sorts of lumps feel like? (A lot of doctors have a practice breast, that has a lot of normal lumps, and some cancerous lumps, for you to feel. Those can be helpful, in teaching you to distinguish between them.)
Posted by Deneb on January 12, 2006, at 16:44:59
In reply to STOP IT! » Deneb, posted by Racer on January 12, 2006, at 13:22:58
> Why on earth would you do that, Deneb? You do know that that's just torturing yourself, right?
Yes, I know that know. I won't do any more research on this. I need to think of other things, more productive things...like on my studies.
> > I think I always knew that I would die young.
>
> Here's a reality check, Deneb: it's a heck of a lot more likely that you WON'T die young, so you better figure out a way to work through these things now, so that you're not still living crisis to crisis when you're 40. Trust me, that ain't what you want.Yes you're right again. It's more likely that I won't die and if I choose to "check-out" now, I'll really mess up my future. That's one of the reasons why my grades are below what I want them to be right now...because at times I give up on life. I trust you on that one Racer.
> But once a doctor who has examined you tells you that the lump you found is a normal lump, it's time to move on. You're doing the right things, getting an appointment with your own doctor, etc. Now move on.
It's just hard to move on sometimes. I feel like I'm always going to be afraid of this lump now, no matter if the ultrasound says it's nothing. I have to learn to not be so obsessive and anxious.
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on January 12, 2006, at 16:53:58
In reply to I forgot to ask - how did it go with your doctor? » Deneb, posted by Racer on January 12, 2006, at 14:44:14
> I forgot to ask, when I posted earlier, how it went with your family doctor?
My family doctor taught me how to do a self exam. She didn't have an models of breasts for me to feel...too bad. She didn't seem worried at all. She told me lumps can result from normal hormonal changes. She told me not to worry. She said the lump was 0.7cm.
I'm getting blood tests done just because it's been 5 years since I've had one. I hope I'm OK.
At least my blood pressure is good. It's 100/70. One time it was around 140/- and my doctor got scared for me and ordered an ultrasound, and Holter monitoring. It turned out to be nothing. It was probably just anxiety. I was also holding my breath, that might have increased my blood pressure.
> Here's the thing, Deneb: even if it may seem as if I'm hard on you, I do care what happens to you. I want to see you doing well, and I know that it's possible for you to do well.
I know Racer. :-) I know a lot of people here care about me. I care about you too, even though I hardly ever respond to your posts. A lot of the time I don't feel qualified to respond. I have next to zero life experience. I've read some of your past posts and I have an idea of what you've been through.
Thanks Racer
You posts are always helpful to me.Deneb
Posted by TexasChic on January 13, 2006, at 20:02:46
In reply to Re: I forgot to ask - how did it go with your doctor?, posted by Deneb on January 12, 2006, at 16:53:58
> I know a lot of people here care about me. I care about you too, even though I hardly ever respond to your posts. A lot of the time I don't feel qualified to respond. I have next to zero life experience. I've read some of your past posts and I have an idea of what you've been through.
Sometimes it comforting just to know someone is thinking of you even if you don't have any advice. Don't minimize your importance. I always feel touched when you respond to me.
-T
Posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 20:48:53
In reply to Re: I forgot to ask - how did it go with your doctor?, posted by Deneb on January 12, 2006, at 16:53:58
I hate this. I hate this horrible anxiety. It's making me miserable. My hands are constantly sweating and I can't concentrate on studying.
I hate this so much. I wish I were dead, but at the same time I'm afraid of dying.
I feel like I can't handle it. I don't have good mental health to begin with, all this uncertainly is making me worse. How can I get through 2 weeks? Thank goodness I came out of my distress before all this happened.
I feel like I should make plans for my death. Ugh, I'm just not well. I feel like I'm going to break. I feel like I'm going faint/disappear. I don't know how to deal with health problems.
I feel like I don't even care if I die suddenly. I just don't want to have cancer.
Life is too stressful. I want to sleep and go off to a dreamworld.
I want to go comatose until everything is OK again.
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 21:02:07
In reply to I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 20:48:53
I want to check out.
I want to check out of life. It's too stressful. I'm just exhausted from the anxiety.
I feel like I can't handle it. I don't know how much more I can take.
I'm sorry, I'm just feel especially bad right now. I think it will pass.
I just want to be put out of my misery right now.
Posted by TexasChic on January 13, 2006, at 21:05:30
In reply to I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 20:48:53
Rather than plan for the worst, why not plan for the best? There's nothing you can do about it, right? So put it in God's - or fate's hands (whichever you believe in). If you can't do anything about it, then excessive worry won't solve anything, it only makes you feel bad. Just repeat to yourself;
'This is out of my hands. Whatever is meant to happen will happen. I have no control over this. Therefore, I give myself permission to stop worrying about it and just relax and be happy.'
-T
Posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 21:36:59
In reply to Re: I feel like the anxiety is killing me » Deneb, posted by TexasChic on January 13, 2006, at 21:05:30
> Sometimes it comforting just to know someone is thinking of you even if you don't have any advice. Don't minimize your importance. I always feel touched when you respond to me.
Thanks TexasChic, likewise
> Rather than plan for the worst, why not plan for the best?
I feel like I can't plan for the best. I feel like it will be bad luck to plan for the best. I have to plan for the worse. It's twisted, I know. I gotta get into the whole, "I'm prepared to die sort of thing again." I think that might give me some relief. I just hate having things be out of my control.
>There's nothing you can do about it, right? So put it in God's - or fate's hands (whichever you believe in). If you can't do anything about it, then excessive worry won't solve anything, it only makes you feel bad.
I can't help it. I can't help but worry.
>Just repeat to yourself;
>
> 'This is out of my hands. Whatever is meant to happen will happen. I have no control over this. Therefore, I give myself permission to stop worrying about it and just relax and be happy.'I don't think I can accept that.
Thanks for trying to help.
Deneb
Posted by Phillipa on January 13, 2006, at 21:57:08
In reply to Re: I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 21:36:59
Hey Deneb for what it's worth I'm the same way. Take your resperidol. You have to wait. It will turn out okay even if you don't believe it will. Try and do something with someone to distract yourself. Something fun. I know how hard it is I emphathize with you. Fondly, Phillipa been there gone there still there.
Posted by TexasChic on January 13, 2006, at 22:07:57
In reply to Re: I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 21:36:59
Believe me when I say I understand. You remind me alot of me at your age. I know what it feels like to be in that pit of hopelessness and despair. It has taken a lon-g-g-g-g-g time for me to get to where I am now (I'm 35). I wish I had a magic solution, but of course I don't. Its just hard work and determination. And for me, meds. I honestly don't think I would be here today if it weren't for my getting on Prozac. Not that meds are for everyone, but I do feel you should use everything at your disposal to help yourself. This is your LIFE you're dealing with afterall.
You will have to be willing to accept things you think are unthinkable, like the fact that it is okay to put yourself above all others and devote your time to making yourself better. What better way to help other people in your life than becoming a stronger, healthier person?
I know, when I was in the pit of despair all this talk meant nothing to me. But I think you have seen what it feels like to feel better with help and may understand.
Keep trying, I'll be routing for you!
-T
Posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 22:50:33
In reply to Re: I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by TexasChic on January 13, 2006, at 22:07:57
> I honestly don't think I would be here today if it weren't for my getting on Prozac. Not that meds are for everyone, but I do feel you should use everything at your disposal to help yourself.
I know. I think meds help me a lot, but right now I'm just going through a scary time. There's only so much meds can do.
>This is your LIFE you're dealing with afterall.
Or the end of my life. :-(
Right now I'm still planning for the future, signing up for summer field courses and all. I just hope it won't be a waste of money. I might be dead before then.
Such a shame...Deneb never got to see the world before she died. She never got to pursue her career in the sciences. She never experienced living on her own.
> I know, when I was in the pit of despair all this talk meant nothing to me. But I think you have seen what it feels like to feel better with help and may understand.
I'm not really in a pit of despair right now. Maybe it's the meds keeping me afloat. Right now at this very moment my anxiety is OK, but it gets bad for a while then gets better and so on.
I'm just not used to facing a possible death that is not under my control.
> Keep trying, I'll be routing for you!
>
> -TThanks TexasChic
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 23:25:34
In reply to Re: I feel like the anxiety is killing me » TexasChic, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 22:50:33
I guess it's just part of the way I'm dealing with things right now.
Sorry if I'm bringing some people down. I'm just getting some things out.
I just feel the need to express myself you know?
Anyways, I think I'm doing fairly OK considering the circumstances. I'm fairly functional at least. I'm more functional than not so long ago with the whole self harm thing.
It's just that the anxiety comes and goes and it's really strong anxiety that keeps me from doing my work sometimes. All in all, I think I'm still calm most of the time and I can concentrate during those times. I just freak out in a major way sometimes.
Deneb
Posted by TexasChic on January 14, 2006, at 13:38:55
In reply to Sorry if my post are a bit gloomy, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 23:25:34
> I just feel the need to express myself you know?
I understand.
> It's just that the anxiety comes and goes and it's really strong anxiety that keeps me from doing my work sometimes. All in all, I think I'm still calm most of the time and I can concentrate during those times. I just freak out in a major way sometimes.
I know exactly what you're talking about. I'm going through the same thing, except with a different subject matter (my obsession is a guy). I don't know why I can't turn off the paranioa and all the negative talk going on in my head. I KNOW that I should just forget about it and move on, but that's easier said than done.
-T
Posted by Racer on January 14, 2006, at 16:29:03
In reply to I feel like the anxiety is killing me, posted by Deneb on January 13, 2006, at 20:48:53
Seriously -- put your mind around this, Deneb: Your doctor, whom you've stated you trust, told you that this lump is NOTHING.
That you are still worrying, and 'planning the end of your life' and all that, well, it's something you're choosing to put your energy into. And you can choose to stop putting energy into it, too.
Instead of continuing to obsess about a lump in your breast that will likely resolve on its own by the end of your next cycle, why don't you shift some of that energy into asking WHY you feel the need to torture yourself this way? WHY do you need this sort of drama in your life? What's going on that you're not dealing with, in order to put all this worry into something you've already had examined and been told was NOTHING?
I'm sorry that you're feeling bad, Deneb, and I know you are. But how about putting some energy into working towards feeling better long term, rather than devoting so much energy to needless worry?
Posted by Deneb on January 14, 2006, at 19:49:05
In reply to Your doctor already told you this is nothing » Deneb, posted by Racer on January 14, 2006, at 16:29:03
> Seriously -- put your mind around this, Deneb: Your doctor, whom you've stated you trust, told you that this lump is NOTHING.
I still want to be 100% certain that it is nothing. I'm waiting to get an ultrasound of it. Meanwhile the uncertainly is horrible. It's very unlikely that the lump is anything serious since it doesn't fit the cancer profile, but some people still win the lottery...
>
> That you are still worrying, and 'planning the end of your life' and all that, well, it's something you're choosing to put your energy into. And you can choose to stop putting energy into it, too.Yes, I suppose you're right. I just tend to see the worst possible scenarios in everything. I don't know why I torture myself this way. Maybe it alleviates my anxiety about living life...since if things turn out as bad as I think they will I won't need to make something of myself.
Also, I think I'm superstitious in my own way. I think that if I expect good things to happen, the opposite will happen. I started thinking this way when I was little. I called it my opposite theory. When something good happened, I knew that something bad would happen. The better things were, the worse they would get.
> I'm sorry that you're feeling bad, Deneb, and I know you are. But how about putting some energy into working towards feeling better long term, rather than devoting so much energy to needless worry?
I'll try Racer. It's hard not to worry. I'll start by ceasing my research on breast cancer. I'll concentrate on studying and I'll think about good things like getting a hamster and the Babble Party. This will make the time go by more quickly.
Thanks Racer for urging me to think of more productive things.
Deneb
Posted by Racer on January 14, 2006, at 21:11:34
In reply to Re: Your doctor already told you this is nothing » Racer, posted by Deneb on January 14, 2006, at 19:49:05
Deneb, here's the thing: I do understand that this is real to you. I understand that you are frightened. But I also feel kinda manipulated right now, as though you're asking for sympathy and comfort and using this as a way to get it. Please keep in mind that I'm trying to offer constructive criticism, by telling you what I'm feeling right now. I'm not trying to hurt you, just to help you understand how someone else has been effected by what you're writing here right now.
A lot of people here have gone through breast lump scares. A few people here have probably HAD breast cancer, and survived. And many of us have probably lost someone we cared about to breast cancer. Right now, a close friend's mother is dying from it. She was diagnosed when she was pregnant with him, and he's 45 now. Even if this were not a normal lump -- and your doctor has told you that it is -- that's not an unusual result to a diagnosis. She has had treatment over the years, varying lengths of remission, and a certain amount of metastasis. Now, terrible as it is, she's losing her battle. But she certainly had to figure out how to live her life in the meantime.
I think it's best for me to avoid this thread in future, because I am starting to feel so manipulated. As though I'm giving you the attention you're wanting, and that that's not good for you.
I wish you the best, Deneb. I hope you find a good therapist, because I think that would help you more than anything we could do here.
Posted by Deneb on January 14, 2006, at 22:35:48
In reply to Re: Your doctor already told you this is nothing » Deneb, posted by Racer on January 14, 2006, at 21:11:34
I found two more lumps in the other breast!
Is this a good sign or a bad sign?
Should I go to the doctor again? Or should I wait until my appointment to bring this up? My family doctor said she found two lumps in the other breast and I didn't believe her because I couldn't find them, but now I found them.
Why are my boobs so lumpy?
Deneb
Posted by Racer on January 15, 2006, at 0:44:27
In reply to I found more lumps!, posted by Deneb on January 14, 2006, at 22:35:48
>>
> Why are my boobs so lumpy?
>
> DenebFrom the Fort Wayne Radiology site:
Fibrocystic Breasts: A Non-Disease
Fibrocystic BreastsFibrocystic changes are the most common cause of breast lumps in women ages 30 to 50. Although fibrocystic changes may also be referred to as fibrocystic disease, this is not a disease, but a condition. It can be known as cystic disease, chronic cystic mastitis or mammary dysplasia. This condition is not cancerous. At least 60% of the women in their reproductive years have "lumpy" breasts as a result of these non-cancerous conditions.
http://www.fwradiology.com/fibrobrst.htm
From the US government site, at MedlinePlus:
Fibrocystic breast disease is described as common, benign changes involving the tissues of the breast. The term "disease" in this case is misleading, and many providers prefer the term "change."
The condition is so commonly found in normal breasts, it is believed to be a normal variant. Other related terms include "mammary dysplasia," "benign breast disease," and "diffuse cystic mastopathy."
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000912.htm
From MedicineNet:
Fibrocystic breasts are characterized by lumpiness and usually discomfort in one or both breasts. The condition is very common and benign, meaning that fibrocystic breasts are not malignant (cancerous). Fibrocystic breast disease (FCD) is the most common cause of "lumpy breasts" in women and affects more than 60% of women.http://www.medicinenet.com/fibrocystic_breast_condition/article.htm
Now Deneb? Go study. Stop fixating on your breasts. You're going to turn into a teenage boy if you keep this up. The lumps are fibrocystic changes, which these articles and others say 60% of women have. I'm in that 60%, mine started getting lumpy in my teens, so don't read that "30 to 50 years" thing as absolute.
Posted by fallsfall on January 15, 2006, at 11:32:20
In reply to I found more lumps!, posted by Deneb on January 14, 2006, at 22:35:48
>Should I go to the doctor again? Or should I wait until my appointment to bring this up? My family doctor said she found two lumps in the other breast and I didn't believe her because I couldn't find them, but now I found them.
So now you can believe your doctor. She is obviously thorough and observant.
What is it that you are wanting to bring up with your doctor? That you have found the two lumps that she already knows are there?
Let's talk about your school work instead over on Students.
Posted by Phillipa on January 15, 2006, at 18:29:37
In reply to Re: I found more lumps! » Deneb, posted by fallsfall on January 15, 2006, at 11:32:20
Deneb stopping caffeine including chocholate and taking vita E actually works I used to do it. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Deneb on January 15, 2006, at 18:32:38
In reply to Re: I found more lumps!, posted by Racer on January 15, 2006, at 0:44:27
I was too busy looking up breast cancer and didn't research fibrocystic condition very much.
Deneb
Posted by Deneb on February 21, 2006, at 14:30:23
In reply to Thank-you Racer for the info, posted by Deneb on January 15, 2006, at 18:32:38
It turns out I don't have more lumps, I was feeling my ribs.
I just have the one lump and the ultrasound showed that it is "most likely" a benign fibroadenoma.
I'm still a little worried so my doc's gonna follow up with me in about a month.
Deneb
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Health | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.