![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 155 to 179 of 193. Go back in thread:
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 14:24:24
In reply to Re: another cycle, posted by Dr. Bob on November 2, 2009, at 14:13:19
You know I am always open to rapprochement, not just with you, but in general.
Will you be willing to commit to bring these things up on board before doing them? This could have all turned out so differently if you'd have just talked about it first. Part of the reaction was just seeing the links there with no warning, no explanation, no nothing. The same compromise could have been reached without all the distress.
When I asked that you show us the same respect we should ideally show you, that's part of what I meant. That you explain instead of having us try to guess. And that you try to listen to what we're actually saying. If we say you aren't hearing, could you stop and listen?
I admit that I wasn't always as prudent and reasonable as I would like to see myself as being. There are things that push my buttons big time, and this contained a lot of them. The topic of bullying is huge for me. As is respect. And expectations of you.
Are you saying that you found yourself upset that people jumped to the worst possible conclusions?
If we're willing to try to give you the benefit of the doubt, are you willing to commit to giving us information ahead of time, and listening to our concerns ahead of time?
If there's a bigger problem here than the most obvious, and I think maybe there is, isn't it important that both sides talk about what their expectations of each other might be?
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 14:30:30
In reply to Re: another cycle, posted by Dr. Bob on November 2, 2009, at 14:13:19
> In retrospect, I switched buttons and moved ahead too quickly, and I apologize for that.
Incidentally, you use this phrase a lot and it's part of what leads me to react quickly. I infer that you are planning a certain course, and that your only concern is not following it too quickly. And that whatever compromises you make now may not be seen as permanent, but just a step in moving more slowly.
It isn't moving too quickly that we need you to accept responsibility and express regret for.
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 14:34:32
In reply to Re: another cycle, posted by Dr. Bob on November 2, 2009, at 14:13:19
My middle school teachers didn't tell me that they didn't know who did things, but they did tell me that if I just didn't react, they'd leave me alone. It may be a true statement, but it never has managed to be helpful to me.
And partnerships don't have to have cycles like this. The partners can agree to rules of engagement. The behaviors that lead to these cycles, on both sides, is a choice. But it's not a choice that can be made unilaterally. It is an agreement, a mutual choice.
Posted by antigua3 on November 2, 2009, at 17:27:21
In reply to involuntary tweet / facebook options?, posted by floatingbridge on October 25, 2009, at 20:20:45
I'm sorry if this has already been asked, but I'm totally lost and will read all the posts, but right now my immediate concern is that I asked not to be twittered, tweeted or Facebooked, but those icons show up on the bottom of my posts. Does that mean my wish wasn't respected? If so, it's not clear how I fix that. Can someone help me?
antigua
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:29:36
In reply to Re: involuntary tweet / facebook options?, posted by antigua3 on November 2, 2009, at 17:27:21
http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/settings.pl
You can opt out here now. And this one doesn't rely on a list.
Posted by antigua3 on November 2, 2009, at 17:38:54
In reply to Re: involuntary tweet / facebook options?, posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:29:36
Thanks, they're gone now. But I'm annoyed that my previous request was not respected.
antigua
Posted by Kath on November 2, 2009, at 17:41:13
In reply to Re: involuntary tweet / facebook options?, posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:29:36
(unless I'm wrong)
that if a thread goes to T. or FB & we have posted in that thread, our post will show.
I hope I'm wrong about this, but I think I'm not.
Kath
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:44:57
In reply to I think it's important to realize, posted by Kath on November 2, 2009, at 17:41:13
If someone follows the link, they'll reach babble where your post will show. It won't actually show on Twitter or Facebook.
I don't like this whole idea more than your average babbler, but I think it's important for people to understand what is and isn't happening.
Posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:48:03
In reply to Re: involuntary tweet / facebook options? » Dinah, posted by antigua3 on November 2, 2009, at 17:38:54
I understand. Respect is a core need.
Posted by cactus on November 2, 2009, at 21:49:34
In reply to I think it's important to realize, posted by Kath on November 2, 2009, at 17:41:13
> (unless I'm wrong)
>
> that if a thread goes to T. or FB & we have posted in that thread, our post will show.
>
> I hope I'm wrong about this, but I think I'm not.
>
> KathYes Kath, that is exactly what's happening, Bob actually conceded that point in an above post. Peace Kath, that's what had upset me so much, but I have calmed down now.
If you click on a tweet on tiny (Psyco Babel's Twitter Homepage) and you have responded to that tweet in babble, it then links straight back to psychobabble and the thread in babble you have responded to, and your name does appear. C
That's all I have been trying to say all along and I don't like it.
Posted by Kath on November 2, 2009, at 22:20:04
In reply to Re: I think it's important to realize » Kath, posted by cactus on November 2, 2009, at 21:49:34
> Yes Kath, that is exactly what's happening, Bob actually conceded that point in an above post. Peace Kath, that's what had upset me so much, but I have calmed down now.
>
> If you click on a tweet on tiny (Psyco Babel's Twitter Homepage) and you have responded to that tweet in babble, it then links straight back to psychobabble and the thread in babble you have responded to, and your name does appear. C
>
> That's all I have been trying to say all along and I don't like it.So that's on the "psycho Babel Twitter Homepage". Do you know if the same thing happens if someone puts a post on their Twitter or Facebook site???
I don't like it either.
Kath
Posted by Kath on November 2, 2009, at 22:25:05
In reply to Re: I think it's important to realize » Kath, posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:44:57
> If someone follows the link, they'll reach babble where your post will show. It won't actually show on Twitter or Facebook.
>
> I don't like this whole idea more than your average babbler, but I think it's important for people to understand what is and isn't happening.Okay - point taken.
I agree that it's important for people to understand what is & isn't happening. I also think it's important for person X to know that removing the buttons from posts in person X's name does not mean that their posts won't be seen if someone clicks on a post on T or FB & person X has written a post on that thread.
Kath
PS - unless I'm wrong.
Posted by rskontos on November 3, 2009, at 21:01:36
In reply to Re: another cycle » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 14:30:30
Well said dinah, as always.
rsk
Posted by antigua3 on November 8, 2009, at 19:27:32
In reply to Re: involuntary tweet / facebook options? » antigua3, posted by Dinah on November 2, 2009, at 17:48:03
Posted by okydoky on December 15, 2009, at 19:07:53
In reply to Re: tweet / facebook options, posted by Dr. Bob on October 27, 2009, at 4:59:06
I am curious after reading through this entire thread if this is "Bob's" ENTIRE answer to all the questions about why... Facebook/Twitter ?
***Like you, however, Facebook and Twitter users are real people who can benefit from support and education. Sharing and tweeting might lead them to the many thoughtful and intelligent posts here, and then they might join Babble and contribute new perspectives and energy. I think good can come of this -- for current posters, for new posters, and for this community as a whole.***
***I don't think it would necessarily be sick, twisted, outrageous, or demeaning to share/tweet a post about suicidality or rape or abuse. People post in the first place because they're looking for support or information, and they're more likely to find it if more people see their post.
Bob***
Is this "YOUR" opinion and/or "YOUR" reasoning?
oky
Posted by Dr. Bob on March 10, 2010, at 2:11:10
In reply to Re: tweet / facebook options » Dr. Bob, posted by okydoky on December 15, 2009, at 19:07:53
> Is this "YOUR" opinion and/or "YOUR" reasoning?
Yes, I wouldn't have posted it otherwise...
Bob
Posted by jade k on July 17, 2010, at 7:56:55
Hi admin people :-)
I know you've probably covered this ad nauseum, but if you would humor me...I was gone when all this started.
I came across the page where I can select whether or not I want the tweet/share buttons on my posts. I selected no.
Does this mean that none of my posts will go to facebook and twitter? Or does it just mean I can't use those tools? Can you, and other posters share/tweet my posts to fb and twitter?
Dr. Bob, do I have the option to request/select that my posts not be moved to other sites? I'm really not looking for a debate, I just want to make sure I understand your current policies. I'm still catchin up.
Thanx in advance for your reply,
~Jade
Posted by Deneb on July 17, 2010, at 8:39:02
In reply to Dr. Bob or Deputy, FB/Tweet questions, posted by jade k on July 17, 2010, at 7:56:55
Hello Jade,
I'm not admin or a deputy, but I can answer your question.
> Does this mean that none of my posts will go to facebook and twitter?
It means people can't put your posts on their facebook or twitter via the buttons, but there is nothing to stop people from copy and pasting your post onto any site on the web (as is the case with any forum). Since you turned the buttons off, it means there is no button for people to impulsively tweet or facebook your posts.
> Or does it just mean I can't use those tools?
It means you and others can't tweet or facebook your posts via the buttons. Other people don't see the buttons on your posts too.
> Can you, and other posters share/tweet my posts to fb and twitter?
Anyone on the Internet can share/tweet your posts to facebook and twitter by just copy and pasting, just like with any other site on the Internet. Without the buttons however, people are not given an option to impulsively do so.
> Dr. Bob, do I have the option to request/select that my posts not be moved to other sites?
Getting rid of the buttons means Dr. Bob won't tweet or share your posts on Facebook. It also tells other posters that you do not want your posts to be tweeted or shared, but in theory there is no way to prevent others from copy and pasting your posts onto other sites, as is the case with anything online.
Posted by jade k on July 17, 2010, at 8:56:11
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob or Deputy, FB/Tweet questions, posted by Deneb on July 17, 2010, at 8:39:02
Hey Deneb,
Dr. Bob needs to sign you on. Thank you for the clear and complete post, I wasn't expecting that so fast. No further response is needed :-)
~Jade
ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting...
Posted by Dr. Bob on July 17, 2010, at 15:01:42
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob or Deputy, FB/Tweet questions, posted by Deneb on July 17, 2010, at 8:39:02
> > Or does it just mean I can't use those tools?
>
> It means you and others can't tweet or facebook your posts via the buttons. Other people don't see the buttons on your posts too.But you can still use those tools on other posts (when those posters leave them turned on).
> ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting...
Are your questions worth answering? Sharing or tweeting your posts could help you get your questions answered.
And of course assuming your posts aren't worth cutting and pasting could be seen as an example of the LWE. :-)
Bob
Posted by jade k on July 17, 2010, at 16:22:48
In reply to Re: FB/Tweet questions, posted by Dr. Bob on July 17, 2010, at 15:01:42
> > > Or does it just mean I can't use those tools?
> >
> > It means you and others can't tweet or facebook your posts via the buttons. Other people don't see the buttons on your posts too.
>
> But you can still use those tools on other posts (when those posters leave them turned on).
>
> > ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting...
>
> Are your questions worth answering? Sharing or tweeting your posts could help you get your questions answered.
>
> And of course assuming your posts aren't worth cutting and pasting could be seen as an example of the LWE. :-)
>
> BobDr. Bob,
As always, with all due respect, do you often have to ask yourself if a person is joking or not? Feel like maybe you dont "get" certain kinds of humor? (just as I have never gotten yours?)
"ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting..."
Anyone who knows me would know I was kidding. I was just relieved that I'd made it more difficult for people to send my posts to sites [where I know people!] I know that doesn't make you happy, but it was my choice.
> Are your questions worth answering? Sharing or tweeting your posts {{could help you}} get your questions answered.
Yes, and no thank you. I do just fine.
> And of course assuming your posts aren't worth cutting and pasting could be seen as an example of the LWE. :-)
And of course, here we go again. You don't know me Dr. Bob. Please stop looking for ways to prove that my self worth is flawed in some way. YOU may not like me, and I'm okay with that. Can't please everyone, right? Please know that my sense of self esteem is strongly in tact :-)
"Poor Jade, she was once so proud to be a babbler, ohh, woe be her!"
see? joking.
Posted by Dr. Bob on July 19, 2010, at 15:21:23
In reply to Re: FB/Tweet questions » Dr. Bob, posted by jade k on July 17, 2010, at 16:22:48
> > ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting...
>
> Anyone who knows me would know I was kidding.Sorry, I guess I don't know you, at least not well enough.
Bob
Posted by jade k on July 19, 2010, at 15:49:41
In reply to Re: kidding » jade k, posted by Dr. Bob on July 19, 2010, at 15:21:23
> > ps-I feel better now, my posts aren't worth cutting and pasting...
>
\(Bob) Are your questions worth answering? Sharing or tweeting your posts could help you get your questions answered.
(Bob) And of course assuming your posts aren't worth cutting and pasting could be seen as an example of the LWE. :-)Dr. Bob,
You are repeatedly posting the LWBehere (its old), in addition, you are repeatedly trying to point out what you must perceive to be my weaknesses.
I'm curious as to why you are doing this. Clearly in this thread you are upset that I declined to have access to my posts via the fb and tweet buttons.
Is this what its all about? Because I had a look at the Facebook page...I can see why you are upset with me, and maybe with babblers as we are not using the links.
I really don't like the way you are treating me. In addition, you moved the posts around so that the point and rating system discussion fell back onto Deneb (she felt/feels). Why would you do that?
~Jade
Posted by sigismund on July 19, 2010, at 21:56:09
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob or Deputy, FB/Tweet questions, posted by Deneb on July 17, 2010, at 8:39:02
How do I know if my posts can be Facebooked or Tweeted?
I have't clicked any buttons in the control function of Babble (whatever it is called and wherever it is).
Posted by Dinah on July 19, 2010, at 22:03:15
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob or Deputy, FB/Tweet questions, posted by sigismund on July 19, 2010, at 21:56:09
You must have opted out at some point.
If you look at the bottom of your posts, you won't see the Facebook/Twitter items you would see if you look at a post of Dr. Bob's (for example).
Go forward in thread:
Psycho-Babble Administration | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.