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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by AMD on February 24, 2005, at 14:32:32
Folks,
I've been doing so well in the past year with regard to my drinking and have completely abstained from cocaine use. (I used to have a mild habit.)
Well, last night I went out and broke down -- had a few drinks, and the next thing I knew I was searching out some cocaine. I found a little, did a little, but that was it. I slept in today and feel ... hmm. OK. My head is a little cloudy, but that may be the alcohol. My true worry is that by taking that little bit of cocaine I've "jumped started" my brain back into its depressive state. I suddenly remember the year of misery that my previous drug and alcohol use brought on ... did I just invite it back with this moment of weakness? Or is it perhaps the guilt that's truly making me feel bad?
I'm taking Celexa 80 mg and Lamictal 200 mg, and have been calm and happy for months.
To keep this on the topic of psycho-babble, the questions I have are:
1. Having done that last night, does this set me back to square one?
2. Are my meds going to stop working now?
3. Can I expect now that my cognition and memory will steadily degrade?
Thanks,
amd
Posted by banga on February 24, 2005, at 17:00:57
In reply to One step forward, two steps back?, posted by AMD on February 24, 2005, at 14:32:32
From another previous addict:
I don't really think that you have shook the biochemistry so much as to alter the effects of the meds. Of course we never know what damage we do when we've combined meds with other drugs (I used to drink and combine prescribed drugs, I am still unsure how much damage I did--but that was for an extended period of time), but I'd think if you don't feel particularly bad right now it's probably OK. Even if you have a few more mood swings than usual in the next days it will probably right itself quickly enough. I don't think it is like you just hit the "reset" button...
The potential danger in my thoughts is more that 1--you touched on those addictive neural pathways, they may ask for more, esp in these next few days; 2--if it influences your resolve to keep away from the stuff, that tricky little subconscious of ours saying hey having just a little is no big deal...at least that's how my mind might go...I'd say its more time to go on hyperalert RE impulsive thoughts to drink/use for a few days, rather than worry about the biochemistry RE the meds--that piece should bounce back. All IMHO
Good luck! If I had a hat, I'd take it off to every person who manages to get off their addiction. Having been there I think it's the hardest and bravest accomplishment.
Posted by AMD on February 25, 2005, at 0:07:21
In reply to Re: One step forward, two steps back?, posted by banga on February 24, 2005, at 17:00:57
Thanks for your note.
It was easy to break my addition: I moved to the other side of the country!
Actually, I wasn't so much addicted physically as I want screwed up in general, and the cocaine just added to that complete sense of losing control. My bigger problem I think was drinking to the point of blackout, oh, three or four times a week. Party like a rock star, that's what I did.
Mentally -- I'm not sure. I am a little less sharp sometimes, I think, but then again that could just be my mind playing tricks on me. If you obsess over something long enough it starts to feel real.
I'm feeling OK now, so I hope within a few days I'll be back off dr-bob.org ;)
a
Posted by Spriggy on February 25, 2005, at 19:12:32
In reply to Re: One step forward, two steps back?, posted by AMD on February 25, 2005, at 0:07:21
I highly doubt that doing this once would mess with you long term.You might feel a little off for a day or two, but some of that could just be the anxiety of wondering if you messed yourself up.
Just remember that we all fall down sometimes. Just get back up and work your best at staying up.
You've come a long way and this was a just a minor setback! Keep your chin up!
Posted by AMD on February 27, 2005, at 20:17:51
In reply to Re: One step forward, two steps back?, posted by Spriggy on February 25, 2005, at 19:12:32
I went out /again/ last night, drank too much, and did about a gram of cocaine. I woke up this morning horrified -- right back to where you started, huh, amd? I feel so guilty, so irresponsible. I slept most of the day, and I still feel jittery.
Have I just upset my chemical balance -- and am going to be depressed for a long time again? Is the cocaine going to interfere permanently with my current drug regimen? (Lamictal and Celexa.) If not, how long before I feel normal again? (It's only been 14 hours since my last bump of coke, I suppose.)
Does cocaine cause brain damage in the way methamphetamines do?
Am I freaking out over one episode that, if I get myself help, it nothing to be overly worked up about?
Basically I just scared the hell out of myself. Two years. Two years I've taken to get back to this point, and what have I just done, thrown it all away?
Will my brain settle down again? Can I expect the Lamcital/Celexa combo to return to its regular efficacy in a resonable amount of time?
Thanks,
amd
This is the end of the thread.
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