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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by River1924 on November 29, 2003, at 15:34:25
Hello everyone,
This is the problem. I know I have one but I don't have the term that allows me to "google" it.
I hope as I walk around the "disorder" you can tell me the name.
My story in a nutshell:
I am 35. At 19, I tried to kill myself and was given the ridiculous(and, as far as I know, made-up) diagnosis of "pre-schizophrenic." For several months I was on ascendin and loxitane. When I stopped the loxitane (because I could not remember a professor's words long enough to take notes,) I had an experience within a month that may or may not have been related to my brain readjusting to a neuroleptic free physiology.
I could think in words. Ideas would stay in my head. I could place them on mental hangers, rearrange them, compare them to new insights, adjust to input from my companion at the time. It was quite wonderful and it allowed me an "intimacy" I've never had before or since. Although I seem intelligent (if quiet) and although I seem to have a good grasp of the English language, I am isolated by some deficit of working memory or long term memory, a garbled-to-mute inner voice, or some kind of processing problem that limits my social conversation to quips and glib remarks and questions. If asked about my own life or thought, I often just don't remember. That one time, that one walk at 19, I could retrieve my memories of my life and my reflections and share them and improvise upon them.Is this a real disorder of some kind? Does it have a name?
Thank-you, I'd appreciate any suggestions.
River.
PS:This has become an issue again, my memory problems, since I plan to go to school again
and I would like to be in a relationship. Memory retrieval effects essay tests and any kind of speech that lasts longer than 10 seconds. Memory retrieval effects 1)basic intimacy, 2)depth of conversation, 3)"getting to know one another" and 4)creating shared plans, memories and jokes. Most of my isolation, depression, and social anxiety is a result of those incapacities.
Posted by Bananafish on November 29, 2003, at 15:54:07
In reply to please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by River1924 on November 29, 2003, at 15:34:25
Having read your entire post, I now understand the diagnosis of "pre-schizophrenia." Actually, I don't think it is all that ridiculous. You clearly have some sort of an impairment in processing and retrieving information--this is often one of the beginning signs of schizophrenia. However, it seems you never developed any further symptoms such as delusions, hallucinations, or negative symptoms.
Have you ever consulted a neurologist to see if there is a structural problem with your brain? Have you ever had a head injury? Ever tested for learned disabilities? Ever had an MRI of your brain? There a lot of things you can look into. But from what you've posted, you don't seem to have a clearly recognizable psychiatric illness.
Posted by crazychickuk on November 29, 2003, at 16:24:51
In reply to please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by River1924 on November 29, 2003, at 15:34:25
WOW big words for me, my opinion i dont think you have a problem, but myabe talk to someone in the profession.. Of what i could understand of your story, i say you are very inteligent...
Posted by MelD on November 29, 2003, at 16:59:56
In reply to Re: please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by Bananafish on November 29, 2003, at 15:54:07
I agree with Bananafish - it seems that a good neurological workup is called for. There are so many possiblities. For example, you could be having petit mal seizures, which could in the long run damage your hippocampus and cause memory problems. Best of luck to you, Mel
Posted by pablo1 on July 22, 2004, at 0:09:02
In reply to please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by River1924 on November 29, 2003, at 15:34:25
Loxitane is a dopamine antagonist (supresses dopamine) so going off it gave you extra dopamine (stimulating, pleasure). That stimulation effect sounds like an ADD-like medication response. Have you ever tried Strattera, Wellbutrin or anything that effects norepenephrine? Just curious, sometimes that works also. Some other things you describe sound more autistic/asperger-like such as the glib remarks and poor social interaction combined with intelligence which is somehow not useful.
It is very interesting and promising that you did feel different under that particular circumstance.
Posted by watergirl on July 22, 2004, at 15:58:27
In reply to please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by River1924 on November 29, 2003, at 15:34:25
Dear River1924,
Your post of experience/symptoms seems suggestive of somthing along the lines of autistic/asperger as pablol suggested.
Best Wishes,
Cindy
Posted by River1924 on July 25, 2004, at 2:18:52
In reply to Re: please help me find a possible diagnosis, posted by watergirl on July 22, 2004, at 15:58:27
This is the end of the thread.
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