Posted by Shame on December 7, 2005, at 14:27:51
Where you go, I choose to be. Does that make me your shadow? Or rather, does that make me your partner, your mate, the one you choose to spend your time with? I know I am difficult to be with. There is always my sickness, or something in my past that intrudes on my mind, or problems with my family that effects our time together. I would change it if I could.And so we live, distant as ever. Still, I follow you, your shadow in everything. There when you cry, and when you are angry, and when you are sad. Even there on the few occasions that you laugh, my heart laughing with you even if the smile never reaches my face. Always there because I choose to be.
And yet I try to be so much more. I try and stand before you, letting the world crash upon me like a wave before it reaches your delicate skin. Always there for you to cling to, as we both gasp for air. I try to be what every woman wants. A knight, honorable and fearless.
Maybe once my struggle is over, things will be like they were when we were new. Perhaps once my fight for sanity is through there will still be something left of us. If there is not, I hope you have the strength to leave me. It would hurt far worse to see you avert your gaze whenever I entered a room. Me? Well, I will always have hope.
But for now, I do what I can; sometimes as your shadow, sometimes as your knight, but always by your side. When the sky falls, the rivers run dry, and everything goes to hell, I will be here.
Because I love you.
poster:Shame
thread:586511
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20051205/msgs/586511.html