Posted by cockeyed on September 16, 2005, at 20:43:15
Hi, I've enjoyed...hell I've survived on these pages. But now my therapist wants me to write letters to me, my mom, my pop, etc.
I'm nothing if not flip or glib. But when I wrote a letter to my mom...It was the hardest writing I ever did. Hurt my guts. It's more fun to be nuts and just go where the neurons flow.
But I made my move. My life has come to nothing, and each day proves harder and harder. So I'm working at trying to remove the hate...I had no idea there was so much of it.
I thought a back-hand too the head was just great as discipline. I'm still stunned when kids not only respect their parents but can regard them with "fun" not fear.
This seems so lame. But I don't like it here, the head I've got, the rage simmering even as I deny it's not.
It runs in the family, and I'd like the run to stop. Because when I flip out, it's time for a cop. And, oh the remorse I feel, making it worse...but I'm the horse who ran away with the cadavers...hey, a bit of verse..but damn I'm tired of grimness, of iron-bound days, and then just a touch of the crazies then back in the ruts of all the days to come.
Just to get out of bed leaves me numb. I unserstand a boot in the a*s but there's no one to administer one. Except for me...that's when the damage seems to get done.
And on and on. Sorry but I had to get this out. Cockeyed. [Now I can head for the fun board-politics]
But first I'll read the posts. Had my eyeballs peeled and reading leaves me toast.
poster:cockeyed
thread:555828
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20050910/msgs/555828.html