Posted by Jai Narayan on October 9, 2004, at 9:41:46
In reply to Re: Ancient mother divine with an air cast » Jai Narayan, posted by Atticus on October 9, 2004, at 8:22:08
I posted on Grief babble about my dream last night. Love to have you read it.
You are so right on with your reading of this poem.
It started out with all the rich images of my aura.
I actually visualized them while having a Reikie treatment.
Then I personalized it and made it my own with all the feelings and ideas I am dealing with.
How I see the old woman in my reflection waiting for me.
I don't look as old as I feel these days.
I do feel old.
tired.
before my fathers death at 91 that's what he said....
"I'm so tired".
all his friends were dead.
Mom was still alive but 1/2 a block away in the mental institution stating that dad was already dead.
He just wanted the deep rest...
the long rest.
He was no longer afraid.I was supposed to fly home and visit him that weekend.
I was too sick to go. He died asking who I was, he had my letters in his hands and really didn't remember me. He was quite disturbed by this. I was heart broken I couldn't be there for both of us at his death bed (we didn't know it was his death bed time).
I know I must forgive myself for this.
It still brings tears to my eyes.Dad died the morning of Valentines day.
His heart broke and broken from my mothers rejection of him in his last months on the planet).
Oh well....
maybe I should spend the day on Grief babble.
ta
jai your blubbering buddy
poster:Jai Narayan
thread:400472
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20040925/msgs/400684.html