Posted by qbsbrown on September 24, 2009, at 19:39:39
In reply to Re: Scott: Discontinuing Tegretol, posted by qbsbrown on August 17, 2009, at 17:07:36
Man, it's been a wild and rough ride. try to follow lol.
So i had gotten down to 17mgs valium on my own. I had to leave the house and see a doc.
I saw a new doc , he put me on 200mgs of librium, and wanted me to taper in 1 years time. It initially helped, i could eat and leave the house, but it gave me the depression that benzos do induce in me, and the thought of tapering over another year made me even more sad.
I opted for detox. Took me off librium in a couple of days, swapped me out for phenobarbitol, tegretol.
I came out feeling ok, but just like confused and weirded out of my mind.
I re-instated 200mgs librium, it did not have it's orignial effect, and gave me suicidal ideation for about 5 days. thankfully it passed.
I came home to be with famiy, and immediately dropped to 75mgs librium, i didn't want to lose all of the ground i had gained. I was now having a horrific toxic/adverse/paradoxical reaction to the benzos, it was making me extremely sick emotionally and physically.
I saw my pdoc. He said that i would not make it with another year of tapering, as i have lost 50lbs, very sick, and couldn't eat or sleep. he said that he would not prescribe benzos, and i agreed telling him that i could not take another benzo as it is making me very very sick.
He said go to the hospital and detox w/ phenobarbitol. he would not prescribe it on an outpatient basis.
They would not treat me, or place me in a free detox clinic, even though he spoke with them over the phone. the only options were very expensive
I came home in a cold turkey state, and was feeling much better.
The plan was/is to lock myself in the house, which i have, and detox/cold turkey using depakote for seizures, and a beta blocker for my heart.
The first week was absolute unspeakable pure hell if you could imagine.
I then quit the depakote, kept on the beta blocker.
The second week, i became in kind of an odd euphoric,, blissful, weird la la land state. I was able to watch tv a bit, my sleep improved, and i could finally eat again, and gained 10 lbs rapidly which was needed.
I now returned to reality last night, and the acute withdrawal state has returned. Pins and needles, severe anxiety/agitation returning.
I am more than 2 weeks removed from benzos, and 1 week off depakote, only on the beta blocker remaining to become totally drug free which is the goal.
Spoke with PDOC today, said i could try to ride this out for a couple of days and see if it calms down, or that he wasn't opposed to the idea of starting neurontin.
Neurontin had helped me greatly during my first benzo withdrawal attempt. It helped me eat, sleep, calm down.
It seemed to help a bit during my taper attempt 3 years ago.
I like that it doesn't act directly on GABA (right?), and that it works on glutamate, which i think is going crazy from the kindling you had spoke about from all of the taper attempts, cold turkeys, re-instatements.
Unlike every other seizure meds, it doesn't induce depression and give me ugly depressive/dysphoric thoughts.
It had odly given me suicidal ideation for a couple of nights, which is kinda scary. I've never had suicidal ideation in my life unless it was induced by meds (I'm too med sensitive, hence me getting off all).
If you were in my shoes, would you give Neurontin a go? Or stay away from all drugs, especially those that act w/ GABA? Try to ride this out and see if it subsides?
Doc says it is my choice, as i am the one who has to live with this.Kind regards,
brian
poster:qbsbrown
thread:906673
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/wdrawl/20090801/msgs/918350.html