Posted by scratchpad on July 16, 2007, at 15:30:50
In reply to benzos and booze -Can't find any pleasure in life, posted by slinky on July 14, 2007, at 11:11:57
Isn't that the part of our brains that's broken down that we try to patch back together with benzos and booze?
Heck, it's all chemistry, I guess. I can't believe what a handful of pills and capsules I gobble down every day to get to the point of feeling wretched. Imagine if I didn't take even those! Yikes.I'm just one month away from having 2 years' sobriety; and it's only been in the last couple of months that it's remotely felt like it's been worth it. Talk about taking a long time to pay myself back... up until now it's been this hang-dog, longing look through the windows of the liquor stores, all those shiny, jewel-like colours of inebriation sitting there in their bottles in every shape and size. Pocket size, suitcase size, cardboard boxes for goodness' sakes. Worse than any toy store or Sears Christmas catalogue ever was, I swear.
More swear words.
But some days, and I have had several weeks' worth in a row of not being able to experience them, I am glad that I wake up in the morning without my teeth each wearing little knitted sweaters; nor my tongue feeling like a shag carpet, thick with who knows what. So I rejoice in this feeling. It is all that I have.
Scratchpad
poster:scratchpad
thread:769540
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20070626/msgs/769906.html