Posted by AMD on March 19, 2006, at 14:31:40
Folks,
I insufflated an unwieldly amount of cocaine Wednesday before last, and today, Sunday, I'm still feeling extremely depressed and unmotivated. This is the longest post-use depression I've ever experienced, and it doesn't seem to be getter better. I can't focus, and when I attempt to read or do something complicated my mind drifts.
Can I expect this to lift, or did I do permanent damage this one night? Is that possible? Would a night's very heavy usage kill enough dopamine cells (or introduce excessive DAT) to lead to life-long depression and decrease in cognitive function?
I am so unmotivated and anhedonistic. I just don't care about anything. I want to sleep all day or stare at the ceiling.
I can't even feel myself getting better. There has been no real mood improvement over the past week, aside from a general lift in mood post the binge (during which I had physical symptoms such as hypersomnia).
I dread waking up each day because I know I'll feel the same.
My doctor just put me on Geodon, 20 m.g. twice a day. This is in addition to the Lamictal and Celexa I've been taking for years.
Can I expect Geodon to worsen or help lift the depression? It's a D2 antagonist, and dopamine is apparently linked to cognitive and executive function. Are these thus a bad mix?
I also worry I'm just getting worse day-to-day. That is, I feel no better than yesterday -- despite not drinking or taking any other substances -- and I have that strange fear my mind is melting away.
Any help would be appreciated. I know I've been here before. But it's not been like this.
(Oddly, this was my first slip in four months. I would have expected it to be a milder withdrawal.)
amd
poster:AMD
thread:622088
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20060205/msgs/622088.html