Psycho-Babble Substance Use | about substance use | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

depression and relapse

Posted by carlo on May 29, 2005, at 0:38:32

I have been sober in AA for 23 years. After 19 yrs. chemically free, I was diagnosed with depression and perscribed Paxil. After 6 weeks of hell, I woke up one day and the depression was gone for 4 years!(40mg. in the am). My doctor decided to try 25 mg. of CR twice a day. It didn't have the same kick so I started self adjusting the dose up and down and I gradually drifted back into depression. During the last 3 years I've had 4 surgeries(2 rotor cuff and 2 carpal tunnel)I was prescribed Vicodin each time for the pain(in spite of telling the doctors that I was an addict and afraid I would kick off my addiction). I was able to quit using the pills each time when the pain subsided and I never took more than prescribed. Secretly I thought the Paxil made me bulletproof and I no longer was an addict. I started "borrowing" Vikes from my wife to help me get things done around the house. I started feeling guilty about using narcotics and talking about recovery. I confessed to my sponser and he told me that I dodged a bullet and needed to stop self medicating. So I did for a week or two. Then came the insomnia and being tired at work. Then I stole ten Vikes from my wife and started taking 3 per day. Then I conned her into rationing me pills every day. I stole Percosets and Xanax from my sister. Can't shake the Obsession! Haven't used opiates for 2 days. Currently taking 30mg Paxil twice a day and started 18mg. Stratera a week ago. I can't get that good feeling back that Paxil gave me for 4 years. The Stratera was my doctors idea thinking that might help the Paxil. I think I need to get off the Paxil. Any feedback would be appreciated.


Share
Tweet  

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post


Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Substance Use | Framed

poster:carlo thread:504540
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050506/msgs/504540.html