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discipline and mood

Posted by rjlockhart37 on February 19, 2020, at 19:46:24

i've been reading about indomitable will, its the strongest form of will power there is, you will stop at nothing to reach your goal. Mainly like past historical figures, who indomindated land, and conquered. But there's much pain with it, so its not for the soft heart. But i've been reading abut self-discipline, i admit, lack it, and ... when i do get into discipline routines, I've been reading about spartan mindset, i've looked online about absolute self discipline. When i apply a strong self-discipline, the mood or cognitive ability lags or falls behind. But still, i don't want to avoid anymore, learn how to grow and have a new mind set. Write down in papers how to deal with mood swings, during critical and demanding situations, and not fall apart.

You know, when i was a teenager, the first year of high school i was disciplined, i ran cross country, track, and i kept up with it. I skipped a year in my sophomore year, then in my junior year of high school, i did somewhat keep up but lost, we were running 5k or something, and i was last one just barely making it. And i was inshape, i wasn't overweight, i had a good figure, but i felt like i was gonna die trying to keep up. I saw other doing it like it's a 2nd natured, i would get this incredibly pain, where i had to stop running,. For a while....i admit there was product called T-BOMB, it was a synthetic form of testosterone, to make you vigorous and enhanced in performance. We were doing a fast 5k, and i was keeping up, i was in the middle of the pack, not at the end. It did boost, something, i was more aggressive to finish. These dudes that usually were at the front, i was ahead of them, i had all this aggression to keep going, slightly enhanced psychical performance. It made me competitive against their smirks that they were better, more fit. Then stopped taking it, and saw lesser performance,. I think really it's will power, to just surge those dopamine levels to keep going. Not be the one at the last of the pack. But they removed the original synthetic testosterone i think in 2005. FDA didn't like it.

So ... that has left me with a decision, i don't see a therapist, personally i don't like going to them, it's paid compassion, there paid to show you compassion and advice. Not a true friend. Being alone, i guess can teach to abstract, rather than the crowd. But you can learn abstract roads that no has done before. But i am no champion, no awards, nothing, i just put all my effort in trying help people see things, and use truth, There a lot of these people that write books, and they write in books to keep giving money, there wolves in sheep clothing. Gain and profit. Not saying that is bad....but, i don't know

im gonna start reading the spartan mindset, they have kindle books about it online. Need to buy couple. and redo the wiring.

I see all these people getting up everyday and having a will do things, work, gettings things done and sustain work ethic, and not fall behind. I have times were i let it out, and get it out. Then after that get back to normal. Sometimes in the near time, im gonna have to do something, and leave floater mindset. A weak mindset of comfort zone, hiding from the problems

anyways, well just keep you chin up, and keep going. There's always been a saying 'comfort zone will not get you anywhere' in achieving goals.

had let that vent out....

be strong and don't be like the crowd

"There comes a time in your life where you have to choose to turn the page, write another book, or simply close it"
-Shannon L Alder




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