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Re: gangrenous foot

Posted by alexandra_k on September 1, 2017, at 21:00:51

In reply to Re: gangrenous foot, posted by baseball55 on September 1, 2017, at 19:20:47

Thanks for sharing :-)

I know Economics is a broad field... I hope you know I don't disrespect you or your field. I just have a bit of a hard time with the Economics i've learned over the years / the Economists I've interacted with (mostly management undergraduates and government employees to be fair).

Trying to make sense of things...

I think there is this assumption that people should take what they can for as long as they can because they can. This idea that they are smarter than others because they saw the opportunity. So this belief that if they didn't take that opportunity then someone else would have taken it instead of them. So the harms to all would be the same and that only leaves the benefit to them being up for grabs and they did see the opportunity first...

And then perhaps some kind of enlightenment... Seeing that it isn't necessarily that they are smarter for seeing opportunities... It might well be about luck... But either way, other people are similarly going about their business in the world searching out these opportunities to get ahead on the great hierarchy of life...

I have been thinking a lot about opression. About groups of people being kept in oppressive environments. Thinking about how those in charge can justify that to themselves. I am starting to see that oppressed people don't complain so much. They tend to think that their problems are due to faults of themselves rather than due to others getting rich off of the exploitation of their environment...

I think... Why does the radio constantly broadcast these innane whiny victim songs... And copious amounts of advertising. This is blasted over loudspeakers in public spaces. I think... Why does the government allow people to visibly drink and marjuana smoke their lives away... Who profits? I think... What is in the water supply? Is it just me or do the people even look weedy and sick? Who profits?

When I lived in North Carolina I thought that people were very polite and that that was part of 'southern hospitality'. People stood up for me when I got on the bus to make sure I had a nice seat. People always held the door for me. People often said 'after you mam' and let me go ahead of them in the cue. It was later that I was told that the last was because they didn't want to be served by a black check-out operator. I remember feeling... Sad sad sad... At the surprise and gratitude and... Almost fear... When I held the door for the next guy - and the next guy happened to be black. Mostly black people took the bus.

When I lived in Auckland I thought that it wasn't very safe for me to take the bus. The people would jostle me and bump into me and paw at me. And I did find myself wondering... Whether people needed the sh*t kicked out of them so they learned to back off... Or whether there really might be another f*ck*ng way.

This idea of... If you keep the people oppressed... Well... That's because you saw the opportunity to oppress them and so you do for as long as you can because you can. And this is justified because... If they got the opportunity to oppress you... They would. Like the Auckland bus thing... Which was *fun* for them. They liked to bounce off of each other, you see.

Did they?

Some of them clearly did... If you looked like you weren't having a good time you were surely the target for 'special treatment'...

The amount of investment... That's the thing, really, isn't it... The amount of investment that goes into aspects of civilisation... If you can't see that the requirements on a high level ballet dancer or chess player or symphony orchestra musical piece are more resource intensive *by their very nature* than certain other forms of sport or music or art then... The *carry over*. Once upon a time... So you think you can dance... The technically trained dancers were most highly prized because the level of body control you develop carries over in a way that the converse does not...

At various points various things have been invested here... But not very much. Because, lets face it, the investors have their own problems, back home, and why the hell invest in all the way down here for? Why would you do that? Things aren't very good here...

Rebound phenomena... That's a made up word with the wrong connotations but I can't think of a better one...

I think I was around 6 months in Aussie before I fell apart, rather. I think it was like... How sometimes people deteriorate on hospital admission when you expect that the hospitalisation would see them improve for the better environment. Then... Well... It's about how when the situation improves, sometimes, there is a bit of a falling apart as... As you have the luxury for that to happen, if that makes sense. The trauma stuff of where I'd been came to the fore because things were safer now. Because I got out, got away, I could see that a bunch of stuff that happened to me was not okay. And I grieved for that a bit and spent a bunch of time going 'what am I doing here? I don't belong. Why did I deserve to get out while other people just like me are stuck back there?' and so on... And I did come right... Well... I did start producing work... Even in the face of everyone continually telling me it was rubbish rubbish rubbish (which was right when you consider all the amazing work that the best people in their field are doing middle career / before retirement)... But I started to see that talking talking talking to the converted was... Well... Shuffling the bits of paper around... (Because my work sucked)... And then it got harder and harder and harder for me to do it. But I actually was very productive... Objectively... The quality and quantity of my work output for someone at that stage of their career...

It is important to me... That it was not the case that when my environment was perfectly suited to working... I didn't work. I actually did work a lot. I got more and more reluctant to show that work to people. And then I did stop working, yes. The gym instead. I worked very hard in the gym. And then in hospitality...

I don't have much time right now...

Rebound phenomenon... That is important to me.

When I get the odd little bonus (that I get sometimes) I waste it on alcohol or rubbish like that. Because the odd little bonus (that I get sometimes) is only enough to get something like that. When I have more... It takes a few weeks / months before you start to relax into it... To see opportunities that you could do with that. That if you wait for a couple weeks you could invest in this thing... And then... The drinking actually stops. It has. For me. In that environment.

This is because I'm seriously thinking about 'power corrupts' and about whether it would corrupt me. Why / why not?

And the environment. You need to set that up properly. So... if you want to eat healthy then only have healthy food in the house. It might be possible to do the 'in moderation' thing on junk food - but I really think that it's just easier to detox from it and don't look back. But, of course, that only works in an environment when the people around you aren't in the position where they would rather you eat the rubbish they choose to live off or... They'd happily murder you in your sleep...

Dogs are better than people.

Except the people who you would trust enough... To tell that to. Of course.

Rebound phenomenon.

I need to be careful... When I start to feel a little bit validated... I need to be careful... It's just the rebound phenomenon thing and it really will pass... But it won't ever get the chance to pass if people think they are getting to know my character and not just experiencing rebound phenomenon...

Nobody likes a person who feels entitled... Nobody likes a person who rages at past injustices (against their own person). Everybody likes to feel smarter and kinder than everybody else...

I really just need to work. 2 Months of my life... Working working work... As best I can...

I don't have time to edit. Sorry...

Things really are sh*tty for a lot of people here. A lot of good people here. There are good people here. There are an awful lot of not good people here, though, too. People who think that they need to take what they can for as long as they can... These people are the majority...

Their vision of the world... The future of the world... The future of our species...

It's so very short sighted. Frontal lobe deficient. To the detriment of us all... They can't see...


 

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poster:alexandra_k thread:1094747
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20160906/msgs/1094814.html