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blood is thicker than time

Posted by rjlockhart37 on June 9, 2015, at 0:14:53

im just up having some deep feelings of the past, i used to have .... well, i have a brother, and i havent talked with him in years, and that is my part, i left, and ... it's difficult to process that i was the one that removed myself from both my family, in regret, they are all moved on, and the only thing i have of my brother and his family, is frozen in time, i know they all have moved on, the only memory i want to rerember is back around when i was a teenager, they believed in me, and was joyed to see me, i have to move on with my life my brother's family, that there gone now, put it to the side and move on, but it's a deep feeling because they where so close to me, its really a deep feeling of that loss, maybe the way i would get back is to call but i have a good hint that would not be a good option, maybe meet him and his family for christmas, but i feel the option to connect is gone, .... but the memory of them ... it's still there, and it's a feeling to have to move on but i can never forget them, and thats the thing when memories are in your mind, they don't leave......no matter how long suppression

it's gone now, as much regret and sadness, i have to move on, and meet other brother figures later on my journey, i have many times, but i never got attached, there's people that call me brother when their 5 or 6 years younger than me, maybe i will meet another mentor, but all of this was my fault, i did this, and ... i don't want to think about it, maybe it can be restored, you know, maybe it will and maybe will not, i have to be ready if it's not, and know to move on.....

it is heartbreaking, i know im a guy and not be too sentimental, but the relationship was ended......

hopefully in the future, will be restored

r


not a genius but understand pain
"unheard pain is told through good company

 

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