Posted by alexandra_k on October 19, 2013, at 17:23:33
In reply to Re: different vs deficient, posted by Partlycloudy on October 19, 2013, at 5:05:02
i haven't seen the movie. i bet they did for her what they did for whats his name... beautiful mind...
i know people who were at Princeton around the time he was there. they said they remembered him writing on the windows etc. only... he wasn't writing brilliant stuff... he had in fact lost it in his later years. the movie... beautiful-ed him up, for sure. most people need that... most people are very superficial.
like how stephen hawking gets to be poster child for brilliant physicist though he has lost the plot these days, better work is being done by others, etc etc. he of course deserves respect for work he has done... but mostly what work he is doing now is more work in the public imagination than any real physics. there are philosophers like that, too... i guess they serve a function / play a role. something something about science communications...
there were people who designed 'better', 'more humane' execution chambers for the Nazi's.
how do we feel about them? were they empathetic?
i don't think autism is about lack of empathy... i don't think that is the right way to characterize it.
i think there is something about lack of shared gaze / shared attention. i think there is also something about failure to find shared attention / shared activity intrinsically rewarding.
could be developmental (is in some cases - never acquired). others seem to regress - like they have caught something... others seem to get a bit like this after nasty life experiences... a lot of work needs to be done in figuring out the different mechanisms... then eventually carving the 'spectrum' up into better (more valid) kinds...
i know this is overly simple... but i do think there is something cat vs dog going on, or whatever.
this emotional resonance thing that people do... for me... it is deeply personal / intimate. for most people it seems as casual as saying 'hey'. for me... it is something i'm only willing to do with people once there is a meeting of minds / once i feel that we connect on a rational level. other people don't speak what is on their minds (so we can see whether we connect or not) they speak whatever they think i want to hear so they get the emotional connection they desire.
the most frustrating thing to me (outside the university) is the number of people who say 'yes i totally see what you are saying' in order to get emotional connection when they didn't even understand what i was saying.
much of my life is spent in confusion that people don't follow through on things they say they will do, they don't expect me to follow through on things i've promised to do, they are unable to follow simple instructions, they are unable to follow simple explanations etc etc etc.
i feel... used. dirty. invaded. icky people. get them the hell away from me.
i really do think a large part of it is literacy. literacy teaches you to understand the meaning of words because there aren't other cues. the story isn't about 'daddy is feeling happy right now'. there is an actual plot. some people... just go from the feelings of one person to the feelings of the next person to the feelings of the following person... with no ability to think or reflect or make any sense of what is going on...
like the animals.
apparently these people are more 'socially skilled' than me
wtf?
that doctor lady who looked me in the eyes, genuinely smiled, and said 'you interviewed well'. she blatently lied to me. she is supposed to have better social skills than me.
social skills are about... emotionally connecting at all costs. never mind the actual meaning of the words being said. 'of course dear, have this pill you want' medicine. of course. people think grandin has good social skills because she is good at designing 'humane' execution chambers... people... are f*ck*d up.
most people...
it really is like they aren't people at all.
which is really a rather disturbing thought.
most people... don't even seem to have much of a capacity to suffer...
in sofar as they lack the ability to mental time travel (empathise in a kantian way) or even consider their own futures...
they need to put me back or i'm in danger. for sure.
the idea... this is freudian - right? that life would just be one big massive orgy if it wasn't for social norms. that the id... that that was what the id was like. maybe the male id is like that...
maybe it isn't repression... maybe there just are people who are more discriminate in their desires for human contact. i bet most women are lolz. i know i surely am. i have no desire for an emotional connection with people who are insensitive to backing off when i need them to. there is this poster 'no means no'. only... most people don't get it - right? most people are fine with knowing full well you are unwilling and proceeding to do whatever it is that they want to do...
that is why people are attracted to fields like 'health'. because there are a lot of vulnerable people over there... i guess teaching is the same...
i don't like most people.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1052545
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20130914/msgs/1052577.html