Posted by Dinah on May 23, 2011, at 7:30:48
In reply to Re: My Mom doesn't want me to go walking » Dinah, posted by Deneb on May 22, 2011, at 2:12:01
Is it possible that you see her as controlling because you aren't confident in your own sense of independence and adulthood? She can nag and fuss, but unless she has the power to control you or unless you give her the power to control you (which you don't seem to do), she can't really be controlling.
Your mother is frightened of things. Is she in general anxious? Or does she maybe not adventure much herself and sees the world as a dangerous place? To her, perhaps it is a scarier world? She has a more limited ability than you do to communicate with those around her. Mightn't that be scary?
And yes, she may seek to control you in some ways. Anxious people often do try to control their world. And I suppose you really don't have as much independence as you would if you lived separately. I never lived independently myself. But if you follow are respectful of them and the rules of their house, they can't really control an adult in other areas.
Can you ask her to go with you next time? To show her how not scary it is? Or take pictures?
poster:Dinah
thread:985893
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20110517/msgs/986016.html