Posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2010, at 17:46:53
In reply to Re: Could we stop the flogging now, posted by hyperfocus on November 17, 2010, at 8:41:54
> I think that Bob has limited power as to what goes on behind the scenes. True, he can view babblemails, but only ones that are sent to him with header info (or whatever the signature code or something or other) included. So behavior can occur that is against site guidelines without sanction if it is never reported to him.
>
> ggExactly right. To be able to verify that specific babblemails were sent, I keep a log of who babblemails whom when and "fingerprints", but not actual copies, of messages:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#babblemail
> Dr. Bob, please explain if this type of gossip and threats are allowable on the site.
>
> johnj1Babblemails should be civil. Threats aren't civil. Gossip isn't necessarily uncivil.
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> If (and when) a poster takes on the Gladys Kravitz's role and gets that reputation as what they "are" on a board, I am of the belief THAT can be contributory to the death of a site and a source of anger and harm that cause folks to retreat...
>
> glydin50Are you of the belief that Gladys Kravitz harmed people and contributed to the death of her community?
> Just don't participate; set a good example with this; don't reinforce the behavior, etc.
>
> I have encountered folks in my lifetime who seem to "thrive" on gossip. It's like it's a source of energy or vitality for them. If we fail to engage in this behavior with such persons, we take away their power.
>
> gg> I agree with you that not participating is the best thing to do when someone who gossips approaches you. But if a poster is new and does not know that the other poster is bringing "stories" and spreading rumors, (made up by gossiping poster) they may find themselves in a huge mess that turns out to be very confusing and hurtful.
>
> fayeroeWhat if someone's new in a "real" community? Is their only recourse to rely on people spreading rumors about other people spreading rumors?
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> If someone was new to this site and had to judge this place by some of the comments made in this thread, what would they think?
>
> I think of PB like a greenhouse of potted plants, while Facebook is like a massive Amazon rain forest.
>
> The lesson here, to me, is that things that are said casually on FB and elsewhere may carry a huge amount of weight and significance here and may indeed hurt someone badly. Posters should be aware of the differences between PB and elsewhere on the net and think carefully about what they say here.
>
> hyperfocusThanks for that reminder. I wonder what the Amazon would be like if plants there were civil, too. :-)
Bob
a brilliant and reticent Web mastermind -- The New York Times
backpedals well -- PartlyCloudy
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:970146
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20101029/msgs/970950.html