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from the rock to the hard place

Posted by ClearSkies on January 23, 2007, at 16:06:10

slammed back from an exhausting hypomania into depression. Meds play a role, who know what makes me feel one way or another? I think I have reason to be depressed, if it's any comfort. Not. I've only taken the starter dosage of lithium for this first week and I am turning into a golem. (Um, just for a visual, you know? I'm no protector of the ghetto or nothing. Just made of clay.) No energy whatever. Eating mindlessly sounds like a great form of exercise right now. Instead, I drink another glass of water and walk from room to room, forgetting why I'm even going there in the first place. Walk down to the laundryroom. Oh yeah, I forgot to bring the laundry with me. Up two flights of stairs to get the clothes, back down to the washing machine.

I guess it makes sense that I would find chat to be difficult while I'm feeling so very unstrung. I can't follow my own thoughts, much less anyone else's. I'm trying to puzzle it out. Paint my toenails. Read the same page in a book over and over again until the words are absorbed by visual osmosis. Is that how I got through school? I don't remember learning anything.

Therapy tomorrow. I can't remember why I was going to find another pdoc. What was that again? I had a fight with my current one? She doesn't listen to me? So, what? Just go in, get the scrips, schedule the next appointment. Leave the patient in the waiting room.


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poster:ClearSkies thread:725630
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20070122/msgs/725630.html