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Deeper than the dying *triger*

Posted by Joan797 on February 13, 2006, at 6:26:46

In reply to To One and All, and All in One, posted by Joan797 on February 11, 2006, at 7:48:11

It's just not the dying that is killing me mentally and physically. In fact, I welcome it. This isn't living for someone to be out of their freakin mind, urinating on themselves, in and out of pain, etc....etc..... But a part of me, a deeper and deeper part of me is tired of it all. Tired of having to do everything for someone who wasn't very nice to me my entire life. In fact, "not very nice to me" is a pretty big overstatement.

Abuse comes in many forms......apparently even in forcing a child to care for an elderly dying parent who was mentally, emotionally, and sometimes physically abusive to that child for 40 years.

Death can't come soon enough, and may God forgive me for wishing it sooner.

Joan

Oh, and thank you all for your support. It doesn help to know that there are people out there who aren't going to take advantage of my heart.

Sabrina, Please forgive me for this post, I know you suffered greatly at the loss of your father, and I in no means wish to cause anymore pain to you.

Damos, can we get married? Why is it that you seem to be the only man I have ever met who just "gets it" ?????

Deidre, Phillipa, Johnny's Girl..... Thank you for your kind words......

This too shall pass.............I just don't know when. I'm ready for a break and finally a new life. This one I've got really sucks.


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poster:Joan797 thread:608594
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060212/msgs/609125.html