Posted by Deneb on July 11, 2005, at 0:25:31
In reply to Re: I'm not sure what is ok to say anymore » Deneb, posted by messadivoce on July 10, 2005, at 23:31:32
> Please forgive me, I don't know your history. Have you seen a pdoc? Have you been diagnosed with BPD and been treated? Why don't you think that anything will help?
I've been to p-docs and psychologists before. In high school I was pretty bad...probably the worst I've ever been. I saw the school psychologist for a while, then I was supposed to see this p-doc, but she refused to see me because my family doc said I was suicidal. So then I saw this other p-doc at the hospital two times. The first time he thought I was really crazy because I didn't talk and he made to count backwards by 7's. The second time was just to confirm that I wasn't crazy probably. He must've thought it wasn't very serious cuz he thought I was acting crazy because I might have lost a pet, which I hadn't. He concluded I had a social anxiety disorder and told me to be careful of alcohol and that I would meet a cool guy in university. He was a nice p-doc.
Things got bad again my first year in university. I saw a psychologist at the student counselling centre, she was nice but not much help IMO.
Then I saw the p-doc I've been seeing for the longest time, over 2 years I think, maybe even 3? She knows me well and told me recently that I had a BPD when I asked her. She's kept it from me for a long time I think because I didn't directly ask her. She's also nice. She's on maternity leave. I don't want to see her anymore because she's a busy person...lots of troubled uni students to see.
I don't have a p-doc anymore. I don't really think it was very productive anyways. She talked too slowly sometimes. I liked how she never freaked when I talked about suicide though.
I'm taking an SSRI at the moment. Not sure if it really does anything though. P-doc gave me enough refills for a year. GP told me to just take then and not think about it.
Perhaps I will simply grow out of it...if I survive that is. I really do hope I survive.
I don't think anything will help because no one really knows how to treat BPD. It also has a pretty high suicide rate and lots of stigma from the manipulation and crying wolf all the time. This makes it very difficult to know when a threat is real or not. Heck, even I can't tell the difference sometimes.
Deneb
poster:Deneb
thread:525945
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050708/msgs/526016.html