Posted by ceesea on December 13, 2004, at 21:09:45
In reply to Re: over everything » ceesea, posted by Toph on December 13, 2004, at 14:58:25
toph
nw and thanks for the reply now.lamictal is not available on the PBS for use with depression yet, only with epilepsy. for me that means i could be prescribed it and buy it but i would have to pay full price which i can't afford. my dr keeps an eye on it.
the last time i did something that made me feel good (not about myself, just good) was in 2003 when i went snorkelling for the first time. i was terrified to try it, i have asthma and was not convinced i could breathe through the snorkel, but i worked it out and it was amazing - Bali Hai in the Whitsunday Islands. Went back there this yr but my mother and stepfather came and drove us nuts so it wasn't as good.
the last extended period of being neutral/ok (although i had a raging eating disorder so i dunno how ok i was) was for 3 months in 1999, living with a host family in Germany. that had everything to do with the people surrounding me and how i was treated...wasn't diagnosed nutty back then and didn't know the feelings weren't normal.
are those the sorts of things you mean? i am never good enough for myself - no matter what i do it is not perfect therefore it is not good enough. i do try to talk myself out of that but with limited success so far. I understand CBT but i'm told that with my mood so low i don't have much chance implementing it anyway - have to feel a bit better before i can change my outlook/beliefs.
it'd be nice!
thanks again
CC
poster:ceesea
thread:427677
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041209/msgs/429145.html