Posted by sunny10 on November 16, 2004, at 12:47:03
In reply to Re: men can offend, posted by Toph on November 16, 2004, at 7:11:03
I think the reasons we don't communicate amongst the sexes are twofold- both have been glossed over, but mentioned...
Men are highly competitive.
Women are highly nurturing.Men use intimidation tactics to indicate their alpha male status. (Pointing, yelling, growling, threatening, making fun of their opponent, et cetera) In this example, I don't mean the men are doing this in an intentionally "domestic abuse" way- it is merely an inbred way of communicating. As long as a "conversation" such as this one is between two equal males, the tactics are completely harmless (although they definitely CAN be harmful if any of those are used as control over their partner, which happens more than I like... I've been "controlled" by one such as this...)Women watch this and are either a little scared of the alpha male, or disgusted.
Women, on the other hand, are inbred to "take care of" "to soothe", to "ease burdens and sorrows". And our ever-changing hormones make it difficult to remain in a state of calm for very long (until lucky enough for full menopause- after we live through the hot flashes..) We are B****y, we moan, cry, et cetera. We show our weakness and we disgusts the alpha male. If we do not exhibit these tendencies, we are mostly treated as men, but that can be very scary as the "male" conversations start taking place and ultimately scares the bejeezus out of her! In 2004, however, our roles have changed immensely. We are expected to be able to do everything. We still ease everyone else's burdens, but have many of our own to deal with. So we turn to our "sisters' to help us.
Women are trying to be LESS sensitive to communicate with men, and men are trying to be MORE sensitive to communicate with women.
For myself, I'm glad that at least everyone here is trying...
My 2cents, for what their worth...
poster:sunny10
thread:414965
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041114/msgs/416704.html