Posted by Poet on October 29, 2004, at 12:57:16
Dear Everybody Who's Turned Me Down for a Job,
I'm sure you found a candidate that better fits your needs. Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy that my overall qualifications are excellent, and that you wish me well. Well, well, well.
I am not well. Monday, I dragged myself out of bed at 6 a.m., got to my newly assigned temp job and nobody knew why I was there. Turns out they didn't need me and nobody told the temp agency. Okay, mistakes happen. I'm not a failure, no need to blame myself for this one.
I can just blame myself that I've been begging for a job since May and this was the first one I got. 12 interviews, and one non existant position.
Tuesday. Temp agency felt bad. Bad, bad, bad. They got me an interview that afternoon. I got turned down an hour after I got home. Felt bad, bad, bad. Cried so hard that the message I left on my therapist's voicemail sounded like gibberish. By time she called back had self medicated with wine and probably made less sense. Sympathy for therapist is in order.
Wednesday. I am so unlikeable that nobody even wants me on a temporary basis. Oh, sorry, that's my negative attitude. That's what my husband says keeps me from getting a job. Must be positive. Yes, I'm positive I'm a failure. See, new attitude. Saw pdoc, answer to self esteem is *born with out it.*
Thursday. Saw therapist. Apologized for disturbing her with phone call. Believed her that I need to call her when I'm melting down. Don't believe her that I made sense. Followed by another temp agency! Oh, boy, oh boy, oh boy.
Fifth floor of office building. Seriously wondered if window opened as I answered for the 14th time why I left my last job. Decided to avoid the window and got into car and cried, cried, cried.
Friday. in pajamas at 12:30 p.m. Will get dressed and rake leaves. Sick of the neighbor kids asking for a job raking leaves. Maybe I should go door to door with rake in hand. Give those kids some competition. Pathetic.
Oh, oh, oh. Negative attitude. Husband gets mad and says that's why I don't get jobs. Bad, bad, bad. I am bad.
Clearly this badness comes across to all who speak to me. On paper or cyberspace I must not send out those danger, danger avoid her signals that shoot out in person. The ones that say, she's qualified, but kind of creepy or something, you know what I mean?
Decided in the future to lie, lie, lie about last job. Funding ran out sounds so much better than doctoring up *psycho boss made my life a living hell.* My references don't include my ex boss, might be safe. HR would say I'm eligible for rehire 'cause I gave proper notice. Even though my stuff was packed into a box and I was escorted out the door. I am when hell freezes over eligible to go back there.
Thank you for reading this, assuming anybody did.
Poet
Queen of Employment Losers & Badness & Madness
poster:Poet
thread:408773
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041026/msgs/408773.html