Posted by crazymaisie on September 26, 2004, at 5:02:24
In reply to Hmmm.. Unexpected Babble benefit, posted by Dinah on September 26, 2004, at 0:59:49
hi Dinah
i'm sorry you're going through all this, it sounds more stressful than i could bear.
i know this is really tough for you, but it sounds as though you're carrying so much guilt on your shoulders. i think the only thing i really wanted to say is that your parents have to make these decisions for themselves and while you can help and advise them and maybe see things a bit more clearly from the outskirts (isn't it always so much clearer from the outside) their choices are their own. and i think you should absolve yourself from as much guilt and resposibility as you can. they are adults, after all, and as long as they are capable of making decisions by themselves there's only so much you can do.i hope this makes sense and i hope you can be as kind to yourself in all this as can be. it's difficult to watch people you care about do something that seems so obviously to be the wrong thing, but sometimes you have to just do that, watch them do it if they insist upon it against all advice.
i hope this doesn't sound too cold. i'm speaking as someone who has removed my parents from my life because they are too toxic, and that's not a road i would recommend to anybody, but i do believe that sometimes you have to just let go. you're already a much better daughter than i am by being there and caring for and about them.
be good to yourself
maisie
poster:crazymaisie
thread:394020
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040923/msgs/395186.html