Posted by ceesea on July 3, 2004, at 22:20:16
In reply to Re: atypical, posted by Elle2021 on July 3, 2004, at 17:19:52
thanks for your reply
my psych at the moment does therapy as well as my meds. however i still see a psychologist once a month (for 3 hrs!) - she was my psychologist but I moved 2 hours drive away, so i go back to where dad lives to see her cos she is so good. i don't want to change drs again, i don't know why my psych is not getting it right now, cos normally he is really really good. i paged him yesterday, so he knows i am not ok whatever happenns at work......maybe i need to take someone to tell him to help me, i just can't seem to let him know how serious it is, i can't be assertive.atypical depression........well that diagnosis doesn't exist here in australia, but I have read about it a lot in the US and a friend of mine there (who is my virtual twin, she and I are so alike it is scarey) has it. If you ever read Prozac Nation, it's what Elizabeth Wurtzel had/has. Instead of cycling through bad patches the bad patches just get worse and worse until it is nothing but bad. It builds up on top of itself. there are other symptoms, like sleeping lots more instead of lots less, and food symptoms (which don't apply to me cos i have an eating disorder so my eating is stuffed up anyway).
with "normal" depression they often medicate you heavily until you come through the depressive episode, come out the other side. Sometimes it can be a matter of just hanging on and surviving until it lifts again.
i won't come out the other side. I'll just get worse, that's the way it has gone for the last 3 yrs. I'd be going ok, start to get worse and end up hospitalised every second week because of self harm or OD's. The second time this happenned they did ECT, which restored some sort of balance and i was ok for a bit, then it starts again...........
now i have a job and i don't want to lose my life to depression again. it controls me enough but if it takes over completely i can kiss any plans for the future goodbyesorry i am ranting and raving again
i'm pretty desperate
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poster:ceesea
thread:362757
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040626/msgs/362905.html